Return of Memoryfest - Day 25/31

Jan 24, 2007 23:05

Horror of horrors, I have not written any classroom-related memories except that one about the spelling word mispronunciation when we were eight years old. And school has been possibly the largest shaping force in my life other than my parents. For shame!

25. High School

It's a strange thing, this combination of egotism and insecurity: to hide intelligence because of the fear of other students shunning you, yet wanting the teacher to know that you know what you know, while also desperately afraid you'll be exposed at any moment as knowing less than you seem to-simultaneously believing you're smarter than most of them and also ignorant in the larger scheme of things. )

memoryfest ii

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mer_duff January 25 2007, 06:56:45 UTC
I think I mentioned earlier that my mother was one of my Grade 4 teachers. One of the grievances that I fling at her when I want to make her feel guilty about my (not-so) traumatic childhood is that she never picked me to answer a question in class. She claims this isn't true, but I remember desperately longing for her to pick me so that I could show her - and everybody else - that I knew the answer (that was also the year my parents separated, so I was more than a little insecure). When I realised that she frequently asked kids who didn't have their hands up, I stopped putting my hand up and she still didn't ask. When I pointed that out once, she said she knew I knew the answer, so it wouldn't have been any fun catching me out.

Ultimately I was reduced to more drastic attention seeking actions (which apparently included lounging with my feet on my desk and insisting on calling her Mom, not Mrs. E, though I seem to have conveniently blocked that from my memory). Most of them involved writing - a play that the enriched English section performed, my first Christmas pageant, a haiku that I just had to show her when there was a guest teacher in the room - so I guess I have my mother to thank for first starting me down my writing path.

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