Fic! "If You Build It (He Will Come)," SGA, John/Radek, milking machine fantasy

[bironic]

Title: If You Build It (He Will Come)
Fandom: SGA
Pairing: Sheppard/Zelenka
Rating: Adult
Word Count: 2,300
Summary: John loses a bet but gains an opportunity to confess a long-loved kink.
Contains: Modified milking machine, pervertible, mutual porn-watching and fantasizing, talk of bondage and toys, nonjudgmental kidding around about

Comments

[kassrachel]

af;ksdjflkadsfj;adlskfja;dslfkjad;lskfjads;lkfj

[bironic]

Two keyboard smashes in one week! Success. <3

[livrelibre]

Nnngh, hot!

[bironic]

Yay! Thanks.

[dragonladyk]

I worked at a dairy for three years, so I really couldn't get into this fic because...

...that's actually really dangerous. The boss would flat-out tell male new-hires not to try it on the off-chance on of them might, because chances were good they would lose their dick in the doing.

I'm sure for the porno they either severely modified the milker or even built an entirely new machine that only looks like a milker--

--but that is so dangerous in real life. o.0

[bironic]

Yikes! Yes, this definitely falls into the category of "don't try this at home." (Maybe I should add a note to that effect above? Hm.) While I have no idea what that guy may have done in the videos, Radek would certainly engineer or modify the machine for John so it wouldn't be dangerous. Injuring himself is not the particular appeal of this kink for John!

[dragonladyk]

(Maybe I should add a note to that effect above? Hm.)

Actually... *sheepish* That's why I commented. Normally I just don't comment on stuff that doesn't work for me, but given the dangers of someone trying this out without doing research beforehand... especially since the only way to get a cow milker to serve as a sex toy is to turn off the safety... Yeah.

Radek would certainly engineer or modify the machine for John so it wouldn't be dangerous.

Absolutely! And they do have perfectly safe machines designed for human sexual use on the market that have the same overall concept and function.

The reason the fic didn't work for me was that every time the narrative touched on what was going on in the porn film all I could think of was "OMG, Porn Guy, do you really want to find out what gangrene in your dick feels like?!!!" Which distracted from the John/Radek yumminess quite a bit. XD

[bironic]

Heh. Sounds like I could have tweaked this to use for my "danger" Bingo square, if John were into that more than the mechanical nature. Anyway - you may have seen that there's now a little PSA at the bottom just in case. Appreciate your concern, and thanks for reading despite your reaction to the porn clip & letting me know.

[catilinarian]

Oh, this was gorgeous. There's something very stripped-down, almost stark, about your descriptions that gives them a lot of impact. I love Radek in this (and I haven't even seen much SGA!). And needless to say, you hit my not-exactly-secret machine kink. :) Love it.

[bironic]

\o/

Yay, very glad this worked for you. Radek comes across as awkward with people he's romantically interested in on the show, but I'd bet that once he's in a relationship he would become all sweet and devious and engineering-agile like this. He was fun to write, anyway. His voice was even a bit easier than John's. Oh, John.

(And, hi!)

[catilinarian]

Hi! *waves* I've been lured out of my lurkerdom. :) It's been too long since we've properly talked.

[tdancinghands]

Oh yays! It's been much too long since anyone's posted any new Radek/John fic, and this one is pitch perfect. Radek is definitely your man for 'better living through technology'.

[bironic]

Oh, glad to hear it. Thanks so much. And yes, I'd imagine there would be many skill-related perks to dating Radek! :)