(no subject)
Figured we all need a good laugh ( especially me, cuz I'm am having a bady day ).
Enjoy and be well!
Chuck
This is an actual job application a 17 year old boy submitted at a
>>McDonald's fast-food establishment in Florida . . . . . . . .and they
> hired
>>him because he was so honest and funny!
>>
>>NAME: Greg Bulmash
>>
>>SEX: Not yet. Still waiting for the right person.
>>
>>DESIRED POSITION: Company's President or Vice President. But
>>seriously, whatever's available. If I was in a position to be picky,
>>I wouldn't be applying here in the first place.
>>
>>DESIRED SALARY: $185,000 a year plus stock options and a Michael Ovitz
>>style severance package. If that's not possible, make an offer and we
> can
>>haggle.
>>
>>EDUCATION: Yes.
>>
>>LAST POSITION HELD: Target for middle management hostility.
>>
>>SALARY: Less than I'm worth.
>>
>>MOST NOTABLE ACHIEVEMENT: My incredible collection of stolen pens and
>>post-it notes.
>>
>>REASON FOR LEAVING LAST JOB: It sucked.
>>
>>HOURS AVAILABLE TO WORK: Any.
>>
>>PREFERRED HOURS: 1:30-3:30 p.m., Monday, Tuesday, and Thursday.
>>
>>DO YOU HAVE ANY SPECIAL SKILLS?: Yes, but they're better suited to a
> more
>>intimate environment.
>>
>>MAY WE CONTACT YOUR CURRENT EMPLOYER?: If I had one, would I be here?
>>
>>DO YOU HAVE ANY PHYSICAL CONDITIONS THAT WOULD PROHIBIT YOU FROM
>>LIFTING UP TO 50 LBS?: Of what?
>>
>>DO YOU HAVE A CAR?: I think the more appropriate question here would
>>be, "Do you have a car that runs?"
>>
>>HAVE YOU RECEIVED ANY SPECIAL AWARDS OR RECOGNITION?:
>>I may already be a winner of the Publishers Clearing House
>>Sweepstakes.
>>
>>DO YOU SMOKE?: On the job no, on my breaks yes.
>>
>>WHAT WOULD YOU LIKE TO BE DOING IN FIVE YEARS?: Living in the Bahamas
> with
>>a fabulously wealthy dumb sexy blonde super model who thinks I'm the
>>greatest thing since sliced bread.
>>Actually, I'd like to be doing that now.
>>
>>DO YOU CERTIFY THAT THE ABOVE IS TRUE AND COMPLETE TO THE BEST OF YOUR
>>KNOWLEDGE?: Yes. Absolutely.
>>
>>SIGN HERE:
>>Aries
x-posted
Enjoy and be well!
Chuck
This is an actual job application a 17 year old boy submitted at a
>>McDonald's fast-food establishment in Florida . . . . . . . .and they
> hired
>>him because he was so honest and funny!
>>
>>NAME: Greg Bulmash
>>
>>SEX: Not yet. Still waiting for the right person.
>>
>>DESIRED POSITION: Company's President or Vice President. But
>>seriously, whatever's available. If I was in a position to be picky,
>>I wouldn't be applying here in the first place.
>>
>>DESIRED SALARY: $185,000 a year plus stock options and a Michael Ovitz
>>style severance package. If that's not possible, make an offer and we
> can
>>haggle.
>>
>>EDUCATION: Yes.
>>
>>LAST POSITION HELD: Target for middle management hostility.
>>
>>SALARY: Less than I'm worth.
>>
>>MOST NOTABLE ACHIEVEMENT: My incredible collection of stolen pens and
>>post-it notes.
>>
>>REASON FOR LEAVING LAST JOB: It sucked.
>>
>>HOURS AVAILABLE TO WORK: Any.
>>
>>PREFERRED HOURS: 1:30-3:30 p.m., Monday, Tuesday, and Thursday.
>>
>>DO YOU HAVE ANY SPECIAL SKILLS?: Yes, but they're better suited to a
> more
>>intimate environment.
>>
>>MAY WE CONTACT YOUR CURRENT EMPLOYER?: If I had one, would I be here?
>>
>>DO YOU HAVE ANY PHYSICAL CONDITIONS THAT WOULD PROHIBIT YOU FROM
>>LIFTING UP TO 50 LBS?: Of what?
>>
>>DO YOU HAVE A CAR?: I think the more appropriate question here would
>>be, "Do you have a car that runs?"
>>
>>HAVE YOU RECEIVED ANY SPECIAL AWARDS OR RECOGNITION?:
>>I may already be a winner of the Publishers Clearing House
>>Sweepstakes.
>>
>>DO YOU SMOKE?: On the job no, on my breaks yes.
>>
>>WHAT WOULD YOU LIKE TO BE DOING IN FIVE YEARS?: Living in the Bahamas
> with
>>a fabulously wealthy dumb sexy blonde super model who thinks I'm the
>>greatest thing since sliced bread.
>>Actually, I'd like to be doing that now.
>>
>>DO YOU CERTIFY THAT THE ABOVE IS TRUE AND COMPLETE TO THE BEST OF YOUR
>>KNOWLEDGE?: Yes. Absolutely.
>>
>>SIGN HERE:
>>Aries
x-posted