(no subject)
I have been taking trileptal for a year, I'm up to 900mgs, I have bipolar II. supposedly.
recently I became extremely depressed as winter typically does that to me, my living situation isn't amazing, and most importantly I've been working a 3am-11am shift at work.
The sleep deprivation is literally causing me to hallucinate with anxiety. Twitch, have bad mood swings, and become suicidally depressed, along with abusing caffeine. I'm up to about 600mgs of caffeine a day.
So they started me on celexa. I feel that my moods have improved in the sense that I'm not one constant ball of depression, however, in the middle of my up swings I get these impulses.
It's bad.
It's not the normal "I'm so depressed my life is so empty it has never been better and it will never get better" suicidal. It's "TRALAFUCKINGLALALALALALA I SHOULD TAKE A BOTTLE OF XANAX AHAHAHAHAH GONNA SLIT MY WRISTS I REALLY NEED TO BE IN A HOSPITAL ROFLROFLROFL"
...I mean it's just abnormal.
I told my psych this and he's just increased my dosage of celexa.
Has anyone else felt this? god please tell me I'm not just completely insane. Also does anyone else hallucinate?
EDIT: ALSO does anyone SI waaaaaaaaaaaay more on ssris?
recently I became extremely depressed as winter typically does that to me, my living situation isn't amazing, and most importantly I've been working a 3am-11am shift at work.
The sleep deprivation is literally causing me to hallucinate with anxiety. Twitch, have bad mood swings, and become suicidally depressed, along with abusing caffeine. I'm up to about 600mgs of caffeine a day.
So they started me on celexa. I feel that my moods have improved in the sense that I'm not one constant ball of depression, however, in the middle of my up swings I get these impulses.
It's bad.
It's not the normal "I'm so depressed my life is so empty it has never been better and it will never get better" suicidal. It's "TRALAFUCKINGLALALALALALA I SHOULD TAKE A BOTTLE OF XANAX AHAHAHAHAH GONNA SLIT MY WRISTS I REALLY NEED TO BE IN A HOSPITAL ROFLROFLROFL"
...I mean it's just abnormal.
I told my psych this and he's just increased my dosage of celexa.
Has anyone else felt this? god please tell me I'm not just completely insane. Also does anyone else hallucinate?
EDIT: ALSO does anyone SI waaaaaaaaaaaay more on ssris?