(no subject)
living has never been so hard. moving through the day has never been such an opopanax. i don't know what will happen next. the events that lead on to the next clue just scare me and i sink further and further into this delirium. nothing makes sense. nothing's ever been so easy. the flow is disturbed, the world has suddenly moved on, and i'm left standing in the wake. fear grips me and i lash out like some wild animal. nothing makes sense but everything's alright. everything's just fine. it's all turning out wrong, but it's all alright. something's wrong with everyone but me, and i'm the most fucked up out of us all. the friends and allies of yore are better, but i'm still the best. my dillusion will live on, and i can't save the world anymore. i'm fucking sick of trying to fix the world, when i can't even fix myself. MY demons are too much, let alone the real ones that walk and breathe in their human looking suits. they want to eat me alive, eat me from the inside out. they gnaw slowly at my emotions, leaving only rage behind because of it's bitter taste, and move on to my guts. i can't do this. i just can't do this.