(no subject)
havent done this in quite some time. well... lets see if anyone wants to donate some money to me so that i can live when my dad kicks me out that would be fanfuckingtastick because hes not doing shit to help. fucking asshole. ok excuse me if im wrong but why would some one have a child if you are going to treat him as a burden and not his brother who is an alcoholic and wrecked the car that should have been my graduation present? thats another thing i was pushed and pushed to graduate unlike my father, brother and well most of my family this generation and last, and i do but i have no help for college. i know grants and loans bullshit but what the fuck is that going to do to get me there? nothing. i work yes, but i asked for a ride once this week and he expected 20 bux for it. 20 dollars to take me five minutes down the road. what the fucking hell? ill walk for less. so he wants me out and isnt going to help by attempting to give me rides to my minimum wage job without making me pay him out the asshole. keep in mind he doesnt have a job. oh i know hes diabled but there are plenty of jobs out there for people like him. hes just too lazy to get off his ass and look for one. i had a car and my dads friend that he trusted so much fucked up the transmission when he put the motor in so bye bye to that one, it was a nice couple of months. then there was a white car that he let the alcoholic take out one too many times because he eventually did something to fuck it up. so there goes the other one. then of course he couldnt let his precious son, who didnt graduate and is a fucking loser, go witout a car so he let him use the truck. i tried to tell him so many times "dont let him use it hers out driving around drunk." but did he listen? no. now we have abusted ass truck that thankfully works. but yoou know what at least hes happy he has his girlfriend that works and that makes him even more lazy. you know i didnt see gas as an issue when he went to galveston just to take a ride this week. and if money was such a big thing to him then why doesnt he quit smoking cigs. and it wouldnt hurt to not buy a fucking 12 pack every night. i swear to fucking god what a selfish piece of shit. i fucking hate it here. so heres the situation im in now. i have to be out in a couple of weeks i have no place to live no car no help from the one person that should be helping me and no money to do it. i might have the chance to move to new york but i doubt it. plus i wouldnt know what to do when i got there. so i may not be on here for too much longer. what goods the internet and a computer when you are living in a box somewhere? you knowthere are some big boxes at work i bet i could get one. it doesnt sound like a bad idea really. you know id kill myself if it werent the fucking popular thing to try to for attention. people try to and talk about it so much now just because they want someone to feel sorry for them. well dont fucking feel sorry for me if i do. id really be trying to end my life. no i dont want your attention or pity. im just asking for help.