the last straw?

[bingbongbam]

Another argument. I know I started this one. This one is kinda tough for me, more than the others. I feel like it’s a last straw type deal. I guess I really have to back off on complaining about things that bother me about our friendship. To me, if I don’t let you know what’s wrong, or things that bother me, how are things supposed to get fixed? And wouldn't that cause a bigger drift between us?

I was really hurt that you called me miserable and a drag to be around too. If it’s true that you don't enjoy my company, I shouldn’t hang out with you. I know I’m always happy to see you and hang with you but if I’m making your life miserable (in more ways than one too), then I should probably just take a step or two back. I don’t want this. If I stop asking you to hang out and stuff, we would never see each other. You never ask me if I want to go anywhere or do anything but that’s probably because you think I’m miserable to be around. I already feel like our friendship is so detached from what it used to be. So I feel like if I step back, it’ll just be worst. I know things change. Maybe we weren’t supposed to be close friends after college. That would be sucky. I feel like I’ve invested so much time into the friendship already, it would be a waste. Plus I like being around you. Maybe I am fooling myself this whole time though.

This is so depressing to think about.