Goddamn cousin Earl
Drank up all my Beam and Southern Comfort when he 'swung by' last night by busting through one of my windows while he was drunk and looking for more alcohol. I know he's got trauma from being abducted by the aliens, but that doesn't give him the right to rip me off.
"Goddammit boy what the hell are you doin?!" I ask him.
"Drinkin'..."
"You ain't drinkin' my stuff without my pre-MISSION...we is fightin' boy..."
So we got it on and he hit me with an upper-cut and I choked him and we traded the punches and hit the ground and I put my foot on his throat until he gave up. He broke my nose pretty good and gave me a black right eye, but that's alrite cause you have to defend your territory. Luanne got all pissed off at me cause I was fighting and the boy gave me his hippie lecture about how violence is wrong. Halfway made me want to smack THEM but I don't want to show up on COPs for being a wife battering asswipe.
Earl came earlier and asked me about what happened cause he was too drunk to remember anything he'd done. I told him we were fighting and he was all "Billy why'd you do that?" and I was all "You broken into my damn house, but what really pissed me off was when you got into my whiskeys." And yeah he understood cause he's a fucking drunk who would hit me with a crowbar if I did the same thing to him...not that I could cause there's never any beer or whiskey in his house cause he drinks all it as soon as he gets home from the liquor store.
I'm restless for the football season to start. I want to see the Sooners put a foot in Texas's ass like they've been doin' for the past couple years.
Anyhow just to show I don't hate all new music:
America...
America...
America, FUCK YEAH!
Coming again, to save the mother fucking day yeah,
America, FUCK YEAH!
Freedom is the only way yeah,
Terrorist your game is through cause now you have to answer too,
America, FUCK YEAH!
So lick my butt, and suck on my balls,
America, FUCK YEAH!
What you going to do when we come for you now,
it’s the dream that we all share; it’s the hope for tomorrow
FUCK YEAH!
McDonalds, FUCK YEAH!
Wal-Mart, FUCK YEAH!
The Gap, FUCK YEAH!
Baseball, FUCK YEAH!
NFL, FUCK, YEAH!
Rock and roll, FUCK YEAH!
The Internet, FUCK YEAH!
Slavery, FUCK YEAH!
FUCK YEAH!
Starbucks, FUCK YEAH!
Disney world, FUCK YEAH!
Porno, FUCK YEAH!
Valium, FUCK YEAH!
Reeboks, FUCK YEAH!
Fake Tits, FUCK YEAH!
Sushi, FUCK YEAH!
Taco Bell, FUCK YEAH!
Rodeos, FUCK YEAH!
Bed bath and beyond (Fuck yeah, Fuck yeah)
Liberty, FUCK YEAH!
White Slips, FUCK YEAH!
The Alamo, FUCK YEAH!
Band-aids, FUCK YEAH!
Las Vegas, FUCK YEAH!
Christmas, FUCK YEAH!
Immigrants, FUCK YEAH!
Columbine, FUCK YEAH!
Democrats, FUCK YEAH!
Republicans (republicans)
(fuck yeah, fuck yeah)
Sportsmanship
Books
That movoe was pretty right on...except for the cocksucking thing. But I can forgive that for labeling all those Hollywood movie bitches as the F.A.G. organization.
"Goddammit boy what the hell are you doin?!" I ask him.
"Drinkin'..."
"You ain't drinkin' my stuff without my pre-MISSION...we is fightin' boy..."
So we got it on and he hit me with an upper-cut and I choked him and we traded the punches and hit the ground and I put my foot on his throat until he gave up. He broke my nose pretty good and gave me a black right eye, but that's alrite cause you have to defend your territory. Luanne got all pissed off at me cause I was fighting and the boy gave me his hippie lecture about how violence is wrong. Halfway made me want to smack THEM but I don't want to show up on COPs for being a wife battering asswipe.
Earl came earlier and asked me about what happened cause he was too drunk to remember anything he'd done. I told him we were fighting and he was all "Billy why'd you do that?" and I was all "You broken into my damn house, but what really pissed me off was when you got into my whiskeys." And yeah he understood cause he's a fucking drunk who would hit me with a crowbar if I did the same thing to him...not that I could cause there's never any beer or whiskey in his house cause he drinks all it as soon as he gets home from the liquor store.
I'm restless for the football season to start. I want to see the Sooners put a foot in Texas's ass like they've been doin' for the past couple years.
Anyhow just to show I don't hate all new music:
America...
America...
America, FUCK YEAH!
Coming again, to save the mother fucking day yeah,
America, FUCK YEAH!
Freedom is the only way yeah,
Terrorist your game is through cause now you have to answer too,
America, FUCK YEAH!
So lick my butt, and suck on my balls,
America, FUCK YEAH!
What you going to do when we come for you now,
it’s the dream that we all share; it’s the hope for tomorrow
FUCK YEAH!
McDonalds, FUCK YEAH!
Wal-Mart, FUCK YEAH!
The Gap, FUCK YEAH!
Baseball, FUCK YEAH!
NFL, FUCK, YEAH!
Rock and roll, FUCK YEAH!
The Internet, FUCK YEAH!
Slavery, FUCK YEAH!
FUCK YEAH!
Starbucks, FUCK YEAH!
Disney world, FUCK YEAH!
Porno, FUCK YEAH!
Valium, FUCK YEAH!
Reeboks, FUCK YEAH!
Fake Tits, FUCK YEAH!
Sushi, FUCK YEAH!
Taco Bell, FUCK YEAH!
Rodeos, FUCK YEAH!
Bed bath and beyond (Fuck yeah, Fuck yeah)
Liberty, FUCK YEAH!
White Slips, FUCK YEAH!
The Alamo, FUCK YEAH!
Band-aids, FUCK YEAH!
Las Vegas, FUCK YEAH!
Christmas, FUCK YEAH!
Immigrants, FUCK YEAH!
Columbine, FUCK YEAH!
Democrats, FUCK YEAH!
Republicans (republicans)
(fuck yeah, fuck yeah)
Sportsmanship
Books
That movoe was pretty right on...except for the cocksucking thing. But I can forgive that for labeling all those Hollywood movie bitches as the F.A.G. organization.