300 pounds of dead weight
alright, so not terribly long ago my mother kicked my stepdad out and she moved to arizona to start a new job and stuffs. well obviously this caused a huge upheaval in many ways, as that sort of thing is wont to do. i suppose that the somewhat strange side-effect of this was that my stepfather and stepsister decided that they not only hate my mother (which, while being totally lame and petty is somewhat understandable) but also that they hate my sister and i...who, incidentally, have not really done anything to garner this hatred.
whatever. i can adjust to this, it's not as though either of them had been contributing anything good toward my life. but i must admit that it sort of hurts that a man who consistently trashed my biological father for bailing out of my sister's life and my life, who claimed over and over that he truly cared about us and wanted to be there for us, who GAVE ME AWAY AT MY WEDDING a short seven months ago--now wants nothing to do with us. of course that hurts. but even more bizarre is the reaction of his daughter, my stepsister, who granted has shown quite a history of major character flaws to the point that i actually believe she should seek psychiatric help (i'm not being catty here, she's seriously batshit insane). she has wasted no opportunity to talk trash about my sister and i behind our backs, at least that's what the word on the street is. i generally tend to take gossipy stuff with a grain of salt, especially in an area like where my sister lives and we all went to high school because everyone knows everyone and the smallest little thing can turn into a huge fiasco overnight. you never really know if the stuff you're hearing is true or just sensationalized crap. so i had decided to not get drawn into the whole he-said, she-said of it. and i hadn't.
today i logged on to my myspace page to find a message from my sister telling me to check the page of my stepsister's husband, because stepsister had left a comment there that i needed to read. the comment said something along the lines of "blah blah, i love my stepbrother (from her mother's current marriage) and now i'm so glad that i don't have stupid wastes of sisters, i feel like i've shed 300 pounds of dead weight!"
first of all, chelsea and my combined weight is not 300 pounds, bitch. haha, sorry i couldn't resist.
also, listen. this is sooooo assanine. if this person has something she wants to say to me, she has my phone number. call me up. please. bitch me out, say whatever it is that you need to say. but my question is, why? because my mother made the decision to divorce my stepfather? so now my sister and i are somehow to blame for this? why? i live in chicago. CHICAGO. the other side of the country, for the geographically challenged. please tell me how i could possibly be responsible for this turn of events. or is it something else? is there some other reason to hate me that was a secret up until now, and now that we no longer have to get together for holidays it's ok to trash me on some stupid passive-agressive internet club? i'm not really angry, because anger directed toward something so pathetically childish as this would just be a waste of energy. i am a bit hurt, just because i feel like i've wasted all these years of my life trying to repair a fundamentally flawed relationship between myself and my steps has been a complete waste of time. i thought i'd made progress. i thought that we were starting to understand each other. how very wrong i was, apparently, if all it takes is something like this to make me into "dead weight."
and fwiw, the whole 300 pounds of dead weight is actually one of jill's many passive agressive insults toward me and my body. here is why. my little sister is just that--little. super thin, yeah she's tall, but she still generally weighs in at just over 100 pounds. so basically she's implying that i weigh almost 200 pounds. if you think that i'm reading too much into this, you don't know jill. this is the kind of thing she excels at...passive agressive insults and backhanded compliments.
anyway, i guess that's enough ranting for now. at least it's back to being my mom and my sister and i. at least we aren't going to screw each other over (knock on wood)
whatever. i can adjust to this, it's not as though either of them had been contributing anything good toward my life. but i must admit that it sort of hurts that a man who consistently trashed my biological father for bailing out of my sister's life and my life, who claimed over and over that he truly cared about us and wanted to be there for us, who GAVE ME AWAY AT MY WEDDING a short seven months ago--now wants nothing to do with us. of course that hurts. but even more bizarre is the reaction of his daughter, my stepsister, who granted has shown quite a history of major character flaws to the point that i actually believe she should seek psychiatric help (i'm not being catty here, she's seriously batshit insane). she has wasted no opportunity to talk trash about my sister and i behind our backs, at least that's what the word on the street is. i generally tend to take gossipy stuff with a grain of salt, especially in an area like where my sister lives and we all went to high school because everyone knows everyone and the smallest little thing can turn into a huge fiasco overnight. you never really know if the stuff you're hearing is true or just sensationalized crap. so i had decided to not get drawn into the whole he-said, she-said of it. and i hadn't.
today i logged on to my myspace page to find a message from my sister telling me to check the page of my stepsister's husband, because stepsister had left a comment there that i needed to read. the comment said something along the lines of "blah blah, i love my stepbrother (from her mother's current marriage) and now i'm so glad that i don't have stupid wastes of sisters, i feel like i've shed 300 pounds of dead weight!"
first of all, chelsea and my combined weight is not 300 pounds, bitch. haha, sorry i couldn't resist.
also, listen. this is sooooo assanine. if this person has something she wants to say to me, she has my phone number. call me up. please. bitch me out, say whatever it is that you need to say. but my question is, why? because my mother made the decision to divorce my stepfather? so now my sister and i are somehow to blame for this? why? i live in chicago. CHICAGO. the other side of the country, for the geographically challenged. please tell me how i could possibly be responsible for this turn of events. or is it something else? is there some other reason to hate me that was a secret up until now, and now that we no longer have to get together for holidays it's ok to trash me on some stupid passive-agressive internet club? i'm not really angry, because anger directed toward something so pathetically childish as this would just be a waste of energy. i am a bit hurt, just because i feel like i've wasted all these years of my life trying to repair a fundamentally flawed relationship between myself and my steps has been a complete waste of time. i thought i'd made progress. i thought that we were starting to understand each other. how very wrong i was, apparently, if all it takes is something like this to make me into "dead weight."
and fwiw, the whole 300 pounds of dead weight is actually one of jill's many passive agressive insults toward me and my body. here is why. my little sister is just that--little. super thin, yeah she's tall, but she still generally weighs in at just over 100 pounds. so basically she's implying that i weigh almost 200 pounds. if you think that i'm reading too much into this, you don't know jill. this is the kind of thing she excels at...passive agressive insults and backhanded compliments.
anyway, i guess that's enough ranting for now. at least it's back to being my mom and my sister and i. at least we aren't going to screw each other over (knock on wood)