Alone again
Somehow, over the weekend, I managed to get on the wrong side of two close friends. Both times it happened so suddenly that I didn’t know until at least a day later that there was something up, and in at least one case I’m not entirely sure how it happened at all. I’ve written to both of them trying to smooth it over… and neither has bothered to get back to me. They were nothing very serious in the first place. Misunderstandings, in the totally literal sense of the word.
Am I the only one who seems to be completely dysfunctional when it comes to dealing with people? Sometimes I wonder if thinking about being with people is better than actually getting out. Safer, at least. There’s no chance to embarrass myself or to hurt others’ feelings.
I’ve been clinging to two things over the past month, trying to get back on track. I tell myself that I’m happiest when I’m working and getting things done, and that I feel better when I spend time with friends. “Excuse me?” Mia puts in. “Are you sure about that? Wouldn’t you rather be left alone?” Last week the answer was no. Now I’m not so sure. The possibility of doing anything social is quickly followed by a “why bother?”
Am I the only one who seems to be completely dysfunctional when it comes to dealing with people? Sometimes I wonder if thinking about being with people is better than actually getting out. Safer, at least. There’s no chance to embarrass myself or to hurt others’ feelings.
I’ve been clinging to two things over the past month, trying to get back on track. I tell myself that I’m happiest when I’m working and getting things done, and that I feel better when I spend time with friends. “Excuse me?” Mia puts in. “Are you sure about that? Wouldn’t you rather be left alone?” Last week the answer was no. Now I’m not so sure. The possibility of doing anything social is quickly followed by a “why bother?”