AHGGGHHHFFFF!!!!
NAME: Bilbo Baggins son of Bungo Baggins of Bag End.
QUEST: To annoy my living relatives until they just can't take it anymore, and to hold the possibility of suicide since you can't do that when you're a ghost. To regain my sanity...and a lemon, with ice...yes...
AVERAGE AIR-SPEED VELOCITY OF AN UNLADEN SWALLOW (AFRICAN):
Still too slow.
LAST KNOWN GENDER:
[X] MALE
[ ] FEMALE
[ ] WHATEVER
CAUSE OF DEATH (SELECT ONE):
[ ] SEVERE SMITING
[ ] BATTLE WOUNDS
[ ] VENEREAL DISEASE
[ ] ALCOHOL POISONING
[ ] CONVENTIONAL SUICIDE
[ ] SEPPUKU
[ ] HOMICIDE
[ ] OTHER...ICIDE
[ ] BALROG
[ X] SEXUAL EXHAUSTION
[ ] BUNNIES
[ X] NATURAL CAUSES / APOCALYPSE
OCCUPATION/LIFE PURSUIT AMONG THE LIVING (SELECT ALL THAT APPLY):
[ ] SOVEREIGN/POLITICAL LEADER
[ ] RETAIL
[ ] MEDICAL PROFESSIONAL
[ ] WARMONGER
[ ] HORSEFUCKER
[ ] PROSTITUTE/PAMPERED SLUT
[ ] EVIL
[ ] BOREDOM
[ ] ITALICS
[ X] ENTERTAINMENT INDUSTRY (ADULT OR OTHERWISE)
[ ] INANIMATE OBJECT
[X] PARENT/PROVIDER/HOMEMAKER
[X ] GENERAL WANDERING
JUSTIFY YOUR WORTHLESS EXISTENCE, USELESS PEON (REASON FOR RESURRECTION): .....I've got a lovely bunch o' coconuts...
WOULD YOU OBJECT TO BEING REINCARNATED AS A RADISH?: Yes. But then again, a radish may be fun. UNTIL SOME HORSE EATS ME!!!!
DO ANY OF YOUR INTACT PHYSICAL REMAINS EXIST ANYWHERE WITHIN THREE PLANES OF EXISTENCE?: Probably not.
DO YOU MORPH INTO ANYTHING FREAKY, LIKE EVER?: A TEENAGE MUTANT NINJA TURTLE!!!! Actually...no. Sometimes I'm French?
REQUESTED ALTERATIONS OF LAST PHYSICAL STATE:
[X] RETURN TO ORIGINAL (UNALTERED NATURAL) BODY
[ X] LIMB REATTACHMENT/GENERAL REASSEMBLY
[ ] SECOND HEAD
[ ] TAIL
[ ] LOS DOS RONDOS ASS ENHANCEMENT? (V10,000/$50,000 GONDORIAN)
[ ] CELECOCK? ENHANCEMENT (V15,000/FIVE CASES OF JACK DANIELS)
[ ] ISILDUR TITS? (V20,000/INDENTURED SERVITUDE)
[ ] NONE
[ ] OTHER:
QUOTE AT LEAST THREE LINES OF A SONG WRITTEN OR PERFORMED BY ANY PUPPET'S ICON (INCLUDE PUPPET'S NAME):
Smaug
How do you do, I
See you've met my
Faithful handyman.
He's just a little brought down
Because when you knocked
He thought you were the candyman.
Don't get strung out by
the way I look.
Don't judge a book be its cover.
I'm not much of a man by the light of day
But by night I'm one hell of a lover.
ARE YOU STRONG ENOUGH FOR A MAN, BUT MADE FOR A WOMAN?:
YES.
--------------DO NOT WRITE BELOW THIS LINE--------------
FOR PROCESSOR ONLY:
[ ] ACCEPT
[ ] REJECT
NOTES:
QUEST: To annoy my living relatives until they just can't take it anymore, and to hold the possibility of suicide since you can't do that when you're a ghost. To regain my sanity...and a lemon, with ice...yes...
AVERAGE AIR-SPEED VELOCITY OF AN UNLADEN SWALLOW (AFRICAN):
Still too slow.
LAST KNOWN GENDER:
[X] MALE
[ ] FEMALE
[ ] WHATEVER
CAUSE OF DEATH (SELECT ONE):
[ ] SEVERE SMITING
[ ] BATTLE WOUNDS
[ ] VENEREAL DISEASE
[ ] ALCOHOL POISONING
[ ] CONVENTIONAL SUICIDE
[ ] SEPPUKU
[ ] HOMICIDE
[ ] OTHER...ICIDE
[ ] BALROG
[ X] SEXUAL EXHAUSTION
[ ] BUNNIES
[ X] NATURAL CAUSES / APOCALYPSE
OCCUPATION/LIFE PURSUIT AMONG THE LIVING (SELECT ALL THAT APPLY):
[ ] SOVEREIGN/POLITICAL LEADER
[ ] RETAIL
[ ] MEDICAL PROFESSIONAL
[ ] WARMONGER
[ ] HORSEFUCKER
[ ] PROSTITUTE/PAMPERED SLUT
[ ] EVIL
[ ] BOREDOM
[ ] ITALICS
[ X] ENTERTAINMENT INDUSTRY (ADULT OR OTHERWISE)
[ ] INANIMATE OBJECT
[X] PARENT/PROVIDER/HOMEMAKER
[X ] GENERAL WANDERING
JUSTIFY YOUR WORTHLESS EXISTENCE, USELESS PEON (REASON FOR RESURRECTION): .....I've got a lovely bunch o' coconuts...
WOULD YOU OBJECT TO BEING REINCARNATED AS A RADISH?: Yes. But then again, a radish may be fun. UNTIL SOME HORSE EATS ME!!!!
DO ANY OF YOUR INTACT PHYSICAL REMAINS EXIST ANYWHERE WITHIN THREE PLANES OF EXISTENCE?: Probably not.
DO YOU MORPH INTO ANYTHING FREAKY, LIKE EVER?: A TEENAGE MUTANT NINJA TURTLE!!!! Actually...no. Sometimes I'm French?
REQUESTED ALTERATIONS OF LAST PHYSICAL STATE:
[X] RETURN TO ORIGINAL (UNALTERED NATURAL) BODY
[ X] LIMB REATTACHMENT/GENERAL REASSEMBLY
[ ] SECOND HEAD
[ ] TAIL
[ ] LOS DOS RONDOS ASS ENHANCEMENT? (V10,000/$50,000 GONDORIAN)
[ ] CELECOCK? ENHANCEMENT (V15,000/FIVE CASES OF JACK DANIELS)
[ ] ISILDUR TITS? (V20,000/INDENTURED SERVITUDE)
[ ] NONE
[ ] OTHER:
QUOTE AT LEAST THREE LINES OF A SONG WRITTEN OR PERFORMED BY ANY PUPPET'S ICON (INCLUDE PUPPET'S NAME):
Smaug
How do you do, I
See you've met my
Faithful handyman.
He's just a little brought down
Because when you knocked
He thought you were the candyman.
Don't get strung out by
the way I look.
Don't judge a book be its cover.
I'm not much of a man by the light of day
But by night I'm one hell of a lover.
ARE YOU STRONG ENOUGH FOR A MAN, BUT MADE FOR A WOMAN?:
YES.
--------------DO NOT WRITE BELOW THIS LINE--------------
FOR PROCESSOR ONLY:
[ ] ACCEPT
[ ] REJECT
NOTES: