the deal with me and my bike
to those people that have never seen me race please dont judge me, and for those of y'all that have seen me race, unless you were there to see gordon crying and janet and my mother holding me down, sorry but you cant speak ether. I realy wasnt there ether but every ones stores more than make up for my memory.
I hit a wall two months later and thought my life was over. thats when it started. The beer, the pot, the lack sleep, and the incredible urge to do any thing else that would hender my ablity to ride. It didnt do any good. I showed up meraculsly perhaps fit for the seasion i placed 14 in the second race of the year and incridible performace for some one who was 20 pound over weaght 3 weeks before. Still the cumpulsion was there, ciggeretes made there appernce. it was like there was two of me the kid who wached every calorie he ate and the one who would smoke half a pack a druken night.
I was doing better and all that had stoped, then it came the one two three combination for certian failure. I maxed out my very small cedit card, injured my knee, and my sister got in to dartmoth. Now i know that the last one dosnt sound so bad and realy it isnt. But in order for the finacial aid to work out so that janet could go to and ivy i had to stay in school. there went my option of moving to califonia and making a go of it. Surprisingly i was releved, i had been lying to my self for to long and it felt so good to be able to define my self in other terms out side of cycling. Im not saying i am going to quit riding my bike and start smoking a pack a day. Just that i might start using my head again. Janet has taken alot of shit for me and i am more that happy to step up and do my part and im sure it will be better for me in the long run any way. Thats the deal, thanks for reading if you made it this far.
Peace
I hit a wall two months later and thought my life was over. thats when it started. The beer, the pot, the lack sleep, and the incredible urge to do any thing else that would hender my ablity to ride. It didnt do any good. I showed up meraculsly perhaps fit for the seasion i placed 14 in the second race of the year and incridible performace for some one who was 20 pound over weaght 3 weeks before. Still the cumpulsion was there, ciggeretes made there appernce. it was like there was two of me the kid who wached every calorie he ate and the one who would smoke half a pack a druken night.
I was doing better and all that had stoped, then it came the one two three combination for certian failure. I maxed out my very small cedit card, injured my knee, and my sister got in to dartmoth. Now i know that the last one dosnt sound so bad and realy it isnt. But in order for the finacial aid to work out so that janet could go to and ivy i had to stay in school. there went my option of moving to califonia and making a go of it. Surprisingly i was releved, i had been lying to my self for to long and it felt so good to be able to define my self in other terms out side of cycling. Im not saying i am going to quit riding my bike and start smoking a pack a day. Just that i might start using my head again. Janet has taken alot of shit for me and i am more that happy to step up and do my part and im sure it will be better for me in the long run any way. Thats the deal, thanks for reading if you made it this far.
Peace