Meta: The Most Pointless Romance Since Twilight
*Weeks later, I deliver promised meta. At this rate, my next fanfic will show up sometime next year.
The Cloud Minders. Het city! Spock actually shows genuine interest in a woman! Kirk holds a woman in his arms! Is this the mirrorverse? Oh, but like the city in the clouds, it seems to be all an illusion. Seriously though, when I watched this a few weeks ago for a second time, I was surprised at how souless the Spock het romance was compared to other episodes such as This Side of Paradise, The Enterprise Incident, and All Our Yesterdays. Of course, this is a third season episode and we all know that most of those are on the side of "who gives a shit, really?", but despite that I think there's a bit of slash to be had. Yep, even in these dark, vagina-influenced times, there is still evidence that Kirk and Spock are just playing straight for kicks.
The reason this episode is so het-centered is most definitely because both the writers and director are not friends of slash. There are two writers, one who only did work on The Trouble with Tribbles and its sequel More Tribbles, More Troubles in TAS and the other who wrote The Galileo Seven and Let That Be Your Last Battlefield. Not only have the writers not been involved much in the show, these episodes are not big on slash, The Galileo Seven only saved because Nimoy and Shatner can take the most innocent of dialogue and infuse it with enough sexual energy to light up Vegas for a week. Even worse, the director is responsible for such serial het atrocities such as Wink of an Eye, The Paradise Syndrome, and The Mark of Gideon. Not only is he pro-het, he also combines that with episodes that have fairly boring plots with weak female characters. And heeeeere's another one!
Now make no mistake-I'm hear to tell you that Spock is attracted to Droxine. As Henry Mudd said in Mudd's Women, Vulcans are not affected unless they want to be affected, and it's obvious that Spock is under not outside influence here. Upon meeting Droxine (who is wearing the coolest dress ever. That material is awesome), Droxine says, "I have never met a Vulcan" and Spock answers with, "Nor I, madam, a work of art." Notice, my slash brethren, not only Kirk's look at Spock because Spock never flirts, but also notice how Kirk keeps staring at Spock, like he just. Can't. Believe this shit. And then notice that, as they walk along, Kirk moves further away from Spock. What's this? They were standing in their usual places, all chummy, and now Kirk just happens to want to move away for some reason?
Later Kirk and Spock are in their rest chambers (yep, sharing a room again. In a big palace. Nothing gay here, move along.) Kirk is asleep on the bed while the camera pans, and you know how when you're watching something and you hope for a gay moment and it never comes? You're like, "oh man, I hope X looks at Y as he takes his shirt off, that would be awesome." Well, in Star Trek, your slashy wishes come true because Spock is staring at Kirk as he sleeps. Spock's thinking about the state between the people on the ground and the people in the sky, and his thoughts wander over to Droxine. I find it a bit interesting that in the flashback overlay sequence, it lingers on Kirk wrestling a woman to the ground. It's very Amok Time-ish, me likes.
So Spock goes to talk to Droxine, and you know he's interested because a) he keeps using positive adjectives when thinking of her such as 'charming' and 'sweet' and b) when we cut back to them after Kirk's scene with that one chick, they're fucking talking about pon farr. I shit you not, Droxine is talking about the seven year cycle and asks Spock point blank if nothing can break that cycle. And Spock, that suave motherfucker, actually sits next to her and says that extreme feminine beauty is always disruptive.
This statement is interesting on two levels. The first level relates to Spock revealing that Vulcans can have sex outside their cycle, which now makes that little footnote in the TMP novel even more full of horse shit. Don't remember that footnote? It's Kirk's little commentary on the rumors of he and Spock having a sexual relationship, not-so-subtly written because the definition of t'hy'la seems rather gay, even though Roddenberry didn't have to make it that gay. Remember how Kirk says that he would not be foolish as to be having sex only once every seven years? LOL, well, either Kirk really did believe this was true or he was playing on the public's perception of Vulcans. The second level deals with Spock saying "feminine beauty", which at first glance might be a downer as he doesn't just say "beauty" in general. Now really, this doesn't mean that Spock only sees feminine beauty, he's just talking to a female and is specifically referencing her and letting her know he's interested. And why shouldn't he be interested? He's not married to Kirk (yet), and Droxine is pretty. She's also smart, because she mentions that Vulcans are on the same level in the brains department. But he calls her "innocent" and he goes to talk with her in the first place because he wonders what she would do with the knowledge of the harsh reality of the world below. He is operating under the notion that she's smart, but oblivious to everything, naively accepting of the world around her.
The next scene changes all that. They come in and Kirk is with that woman and Spock asks, "did we interrupt something?" and dear lord, just look at Kirk's smirk. It's like they're playing a game. A kind of het chicken, if you will. 'Ha, work of art my ass, how will he like it if I'm with a woman too?' Droxine has the slave girl taken away and, whoops, turns out that she actually thinks it's grand that the primitive people stay below, working to build a paradise they'll never enjoy. From this point on, it's clear that Spock's opinion of her has changed, signified with the incredulous eyebrow lift he gives when she states, "Just as your minds are not accustomed to logic," and isn't that telling that they use the word logic here. He no longer flirts and he doesn't seem overly hurt about her not being right for him , not like he was with Leila or Zarabeth or hell, even the Romulan commander. We're not supposed to take Droxine seriously, and that, to me, makes it much more palatable. Hell, Spock is half-human, and all of us have been attracted to someone but then realized they were complete idiots.
My favorite part of the whole episode comes when Droxine is mooning over Spock and how he has sensitive hearing and, why, if she called out he could hear her and come down to visit. Her father bad-mouths Kirk and says Spock is as bad as he is, but Droxine is all, "I'm sure Mister Spock would not behave so." ...While he's attempting to beam your Dad up and Start Shit. *dies laughing* What is with Spock liking girls who don't understand him? I don't think he's had one romance in which the other person actually knows him. Even Leila, who had a prior history with Spock, didn't even know where his heart was located. And now you have Droxine who fawns over him and thinks he'll beam down for a tea party.
My second favorite part is when they beam Kirk up while he's still going through the effects of the Anger Gas. Spock grabs Kirk as he's attacking Droxine's father, and yells, "the zenite gas!" Kirk, I swear, makes the exact same grunting noise he made when he grabbed Spock in the turbolift scene during And the Children Shall Lead, then lifts his fist to hit Spock, but stops midway and they just stare at each other for several long seconds, and Kirk breaks out of it. There are no words to describe how much I love that Kirk and Spock can make each other come back to reality, can ground each other, and they do this all the time throughout the series. After this Kirk is all cutesy again and they move together like they're magnets, McCoy torn between being pissy that Kirk does stupid students and pissy that Kirk and Spock can't resolve their tension already. " Another seemingly slashless episode saved by Shatnoy, who seem unable to make a single episode without having Kirk and Spock flirt shamelessly.
Finally, we get Spock leaving Droxine, and it's hilarious when you compare this with other women he's said goodbye to. There was Leila and that moving speech he gave, his regret that he was untruthful with the Romulan Commander, and his utter pain at leaving Zarabeth alone to die. Droxine redeems herself a little by saying she'll visit the mines and then not-so-subtly says she'd like to visit Vulcan. Oh my goodness, I crack up every time I watch because Spock doesn't even answer her, just nods his head a little with a tight expression like he's thinking, "Yeah, right." Then Spock wastes no time following Kirk and Droxine stares after their hasty retreat like she's wondering what the fuck just happened. When they're standing at the top of some stairs about to beam up, Spock's not even staring at her wistfully. Instead, he's casually looking around or at Kirk like he's ready to get out of there before it starts raining or something. Truly their love was the stuff of legend.
The Cloud Minders. Het city! Spock actually shows genuine interest in a woman! Kirk holds a woman in his arms! Is this the mirrorverse? Oh, but like the city in the clouds, it seems to be all an illusion. Seriously though, when I watched this a few weeks ago for a second time, I was surprised at how souless the Spock het romance was compared to other episodes such as This Side of Paradise, The Enterprise Incident, and All Our Yesterdays. Of course, this is a third season episode and we all know that most of those are on the side of "who gives a shit, really?", but despite that I think there's a bit of slash to be had. Yep, even in these dark, vagina-influenced times, there is still evidence that Kirk and Spock are just playing straight for kicks.
The reason this episode is so het-centered is most definitely because both the writers and director are not friends of slash. There are two writers, one who only did work on The Trouble with Tribbles and its sequel More Tribbles, More Troubles in TAS and the other who wrote The Galileo Seven and Let That Be Your Last Battlefield. Not only have the writers not been involved much in the show, these episodes are not big on slash, The Galileo Seven only saved because Nimoy and Shatner can take the most innocent of dialogue and infuse it with enough sexual energy to light up Vegas for a week. Even worse, the director is responsible for such serial het atrocities such as Wink of an Eye, The Paradise Syndrome, and The Mark of Gideon. Not only is he pro-het, he also combines that with episodes that have fairly boring plots with weak female characters. And heeeeere's another one!
Now make no mistake-I'm hear to tell you that Spock is attracted to Droxine. As Henry Mudd said in Mudd's Women, Vulcans are not affected unless they want to be affected, and it's obvious that Spock is under not outside influence here. Upon meeting Droxine (who is wearing the coolest dress ever. That material is awesome), Droxine says, "I have never met a Vulcan" and Spock answers with, "Nor I, madam, a work of art." Notice, my slash brethren, not only Kirk's look at Spock because Spock never flirts, but also notice how Kirk keeps staring at Spock, like he just. Can't. Believe this shit. And then notice that, as they walk along, Kirk moves further away from Spock. What's this? They were standing in their usual places, all chummy, and now Kirk just happens to want to move away for some reason?
Later Kirk and Spock are in their rest chambers (yep, sharing a room again. In a big palace. Nothing gay here, move along.) Kirk is asleep on the bed while the camera pans, and you know how when you're watching something and you hope for a gay moment and it never comes? You're like, "oh man, I hope X looks at Y as he takes his shirt off, that would be awesome." Well, in Star Trek, your slashy wishes come true because Spock is staring at Kirk as he sleeps. Spock's thinking about the state between the people on the ground and the people in the sky, and his thoughts wander over to Droxine. I find it a bit interesting that in the flashback overlay sequence, it lingers on Kirk wrestling a woman to the ground. It's very Amok Time-ish, me likes.
So Spock goes to talk to Droxine, and you know he's interested because a) he keeps using positive adjectives when thinking of her such as 'charming' and 'sweet' and b) when we cut back to them after Kirk's scene with that one chick, they're fucking talking about pon farr. I shit you not, Droxine is talking about the seven year cycle and asks Spock point blank if nothing can break that cycle. And Spock, that suave motherfucker, actually sits next to her and says that extreme feminine beauty is always disruptive.
This statement is interesting on two levels. The first level relates to Spock revealing that Vulcans can have sex outside their cycle, which now makes that little footnote in the TMP novel even more full of horse shit. Don't remember that footnote? It's Kirk's little commentary on the rumors of he and Spock having a sexual relationship, not-so-subtly written because the definition of t'hy'la seems rather gay, even though Roddenberry didn't have to make it that gay. Remember how Kirk says that he would not be foolish as to be having sex only once every seven years? LOL, well, either Kirk really did believe this was true or he was playing on the public's perception of Vulcans. The second level deals with Spock saying "feminine beauty", which at first glance might be a downer as he doesn't just say "beauty" in general. Now really, this doesn't mean that Spock only sees feminine beauty, he's just talking to a female and is specifically referencing her and letting her know he's interested. And why shouldn't he be interested? He's not married to Kirk (yet), and Droxine is pretty. She's also smart, because she mentions that Vulcans are on the same level in the brains department. But he calls her "innocent" and he goes to talk with her in the first place because he wonders what she would do with the knowledge of the harsh reality of the world below. He is operating under the notion that she's smart, but oblivious to everything, naively accepting of the world around her.
The next scene changes all that. They come in and Kirk is with that woman and Spock asks, "did we interrupt something?" and dear lord, just look at Kirk's smirk. It's like they're playing a game. A kind of het chicken, if you will. 'Ha, work of art my ass, how will he like it if I'm with a woman too?' Droxine has the slave girl taken away and, whoops, turns out that she actually thinks it's grand that the primitive people stay below, working to build a paradise they'll never enjoy. From this point on, it's clear that Spock's opinion of her has changed, signified with the incredulous eyebrow lift he gives when she states, "Just as your minds are not accustomed to logic," and isn't that telling that they use the word logic here. He no longer flirts and he doesn't seem overly hurt about her not being right for him , not like he was with Leila or Zarabeth or hell, even the Romulan commander. We're not supposed to take Droxine seriously, and that, to me, makes it much more palatable. Hell, Spock is half-human, and all of us have been attracted to someone but then realized they were complete idiots.
My favorite part of the whole episode comes when Droxine is mooning over Spock and how he has sensitive hearing and, why, if she called out he could hear her and come down to visit. Her father bad-mouths Kirk and says Spock is as bad as he is, but Droxine is all, "I'm sure Mister Spock would not behave so." ...While he's attempting to beam your Dad up and Start Shit. *dies laughing* What is with Spock liking girls who don't understand him? I don't think he's had one romance in which the other person actually knows him. Even Leila, who had a prior history with Spock, didn't even know where his heart was located. And now you have Droxine who fawns over him and thinks he'll beam down for a tea party.
My second favorite part is when they beam Kirk up while he's still going through the effects of the Anger Gas. Spock grabs Kirk as he's attacking Droxine's father, and yells, "the zenite gas!" Kirk, I swear, makes the exact same grunting noise he made when he grabbed Spock in the turbolift scene during And the Children Shall Lead, then lifts his fist to hit Spock, but stops midway and they just stare at each other for several long seconds, and Kirk breaks out of it. There are no words to describe how much I love that Kirk and Spock can make each other come back to reality, can ground each other, and they do this all the time throughout the series. After this Kirk is all cutesy again and they move together like they're magnets, McCoy torn between being pissy that Kirk does stupid students and pissy that Kirk and Spock can't resolve their tension already. " Another seemingly slashless episode saved by Shatnoy, who seem unable to make a single episode without having Kirk and Spock flirt shamelessly.
Finally, we get Spock leaving Droxine, and it's hilarious when you compare this with other women he's said goodbye to. There was Leila and that moving speech he gave, his regret that he was untruthful with the Romulan Commander, and his utter pain at leaving Zarabeth alone to die. Droxine redeems herself a little by saying she'll visit the mines and then not-so-subtly says she'd like to visit Vulcan. Oh my goodness, I crack up every time I watch because Spock doesn't even answer her, just nods his head a little with a tight expression like he's thinking, "Yeah, right." Then Spock wastes no time following Kirk and Droxine stares after their hasty retreat like she's wondering what the fuck just happened. When they're standing at the top of some stairs about to beam up, Spock's not even staring at her wistfully. Instead, he's casually looking around or at Kirk like he's ready to get out of there before it starts raining or something. Truly their love was the stuff of legend.