(no subject)

[bigmamac]

I can't handle it anymore....you can't do this to yourself. I thought about everything and anything I could do to make you stop cutting. I couldn't even look at you without seeing IT everywhere. There is so much that people don't know and I don't know what to do. I'm starting to lose it. You can't expect me to look at you with all that shit all over you and not expect me to want to cry. You wore something that totally showed everything you had done. WHY? I just don't understand. I read your entry and had to make myself think it was not as bad as it sounded. But it was worse. I've never seen cuts like that. I was scared....that's partly why I left. It made my heart break and my eyes well up with tears. I'm not that strong.....I can't handle. I'm scared.

I've never been so sorry About the name Mama. Mama makes everything better..and I can't don't it..I can't make everything better. Courtney can't do anyhting..I'm sorry I can't me MAMA!