alright its been awhile lets update.....lol
Alright.....I havent really done much of nothing these last couple of days but try to stay busy and keep shit off my mind.....but now.......its worse but I feel like I did the right thing....but the right thing is so so painful.....shewww :( but anyways lets update..
July 29th, 2005
Well I was dads this day still yet (Kay didnt leave yet lol) I stayed up all night Im pretty sure and did nothing but talk on the computer.....fun huh? lol
July 30th, 2005
I was at dads until about 6 and then David came and took me to Tabbi's I stayed there until about 9:30 and them mom came and picked me up I played basketball pretty much while I was up there lol.......me and Tabbi didnt have much time to do talk or anything because my mother comes to fast!!!!! lol.....but this night into the early morning came a big decision.....but it happened at 12 something so I'll go to that one lol.
July 31st, 2005
At exactly 12:00 am I decided that enough was enough.......I took enough shit....I had so many bad dreams.......empty feelings loss of appetite and shit like that........so I decided that I wasnt going to bed until I got ahold of Chelsea.....so I got Tabbi on 3 way and called her number (since her dad wont let me talk to her if he answered I was going to get Tabbi to ask for him) well he answered and Tabbi asked where Chelsea was........he said she was at Dustin's hmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm..........at 12:00 am on a Tuesday Night into Wednesday morning.........now how many people 13 years old gets to do that now days??.......HAHAHA.......well........guess what I did....:D.......I told Tabbi that I would call her back that I was going to get that fuckers number and call her ass over there......(at this point I was pissed off) well I got his number and I called Tabbi back on 3 way and I told her that if anyone answered other than Chelsea to ask for Chelsea and we called.....Dustin answered and Tabbi asked for her.....well as soon as Chelsea got the phone I said "We need to talk." she said "How did you get this number." I said "I have my ways."...and at this point....I just went off.....I didnt get crazy mad and start screaming but I dont remember anything I said.....but I do remember what I called to ask her.....I remember asking what did she want and if she still loved me.....and she said can you call me back.......and I said no I need to know now and I started saying more stuff and then finally she said......."I dont know" and then I said well Im going to get over you and she said ok and I said bye.......click........well now after that was over........shewwww I got off the phone and damn.......you talk about pain.....Im glad Tabbi was there for me to talk to me on the phone.......after all that or I would have broke down.....but she has really helped me through this........and Chelsea if you read this if you're not busy with Dustin or all your other guys.......yeah Tabbi was on the phone with me when I called you because I didnt want your dad not telling me where you were......so I got Tabbi to ask him and Dustin when I called.......and Yeah Chelsea.....Tabbi was on there when I told you that I loved you........hmmmmmmmm Chelsea.......why did you want me to call you back anyways??? Busy??? or didnt want to let Dustin know who you were talking to.......Im sorry for that....I know what its like to be interrupted......and Tabbi heard me tell you that I loved you....and all you put on your yahoo messenger was "I guess" when I told you that........wow Chelsea........thats love........it really is.......do you know what I've been doing all this morning Chelsea (Aug. 2nd at 7 in the morning) reading our history on this computer.......it goes all the way back in February you know when we first met and started talking.....since you dwell on the past and shit Chelsea........do you know what you told me TWO WEEKS before me and you started talking???.......you said you were desperate and you were trying to figure out who to date.....Wesley or Lawrence........thats nice Chelsea.....I never read our past because I let it go....but all the times you made me feel bad because I told you Ricky helped me get hooked up with you because you said I did it because of pity.......WELL CHELSEA.......YOU WERE DESPERATE!!!!!!!!!!! IS THAT WHAT I WAS CHELSEA????? WHOS BEEN LIVING A FUCKING LIE NOW CHELSEA RAE???!!!!!!! WHO!!!!!!!!? I read the shit on this computer........NOT ONCE did you say you liked me you were talking about all kinds of other guys.....Bradley Kelly Lawrence Wesley people like that.....and this was 2 weeks before me and you started talking.......then we started dating about a week after we started talking.......now I want you to really think about all this Chelsea Jewell.......you can think what you want.....Im going back and forth back and forth back and forth between you and Tabbi..........ARE YOU REALLY THAT STUPID.......WHY THE FUCK WOULD I SIT IN A DAMN HOUSE ALL FUCKING DAY AND WAIT ON A DAMN PHONE CALL THATS NOT GOING TO COME BECAUSE SOMEONE IS TOOOOOOO BUSY DOING OTHER THINGS WITH OTHER GUYS!!!!!!!!!! NOW CHELSEA.......I GOT A QUESTION FOR YOU??? HAVE YOU REALLY EVEN LOVED ME? I REMEMBER WHEN YOU CRIED ON MY SHOULDER WHEN WE WERE LAYING IN THE BED AND YOU TOLD ME THAT YOU NEVER WANTED TO LOSE ME.....BUT THEN YOU TELL ME THAT YOU CAN MAKE YOURSELF FAKE CRY??? THAT MAKES ME THINK CHELSEA.......WAS ALL THIS FAKE??????? WERE YOU DESPERATE WHEN YOU GOT WITH ME??? AND THEN YOU JUST GREW TO LIKE ME?? IS THAT WHAT IT WAS CHELSEA??? WHAT WAS IT???? YOU GAVE THE FIRST GUY WHO CAME ALONG A CHANCE??? BECAUSE CHELSEA........YOU NEVER REALLY TOLD ME THAT YOU LIKED ME.....I HEARD IT FROM OTHER PEOPLE.....I WAS ON THE PHONE ONE TIME WHEN TISHA CALLED YOU ON 3 WAY WHEN ME AND HER WAS TALKING.......AT ONE TIME....YOU ADMITTED THAT YOU DIDNT LIKE ME.......BUT YOU TALKED SHIT TO TISHA FOR TALKING TO ME.........UHHH OHHH....WAS THAT A LIE???? CHELSEA JEWELL LIED TO ME BEFORE OMG!!!!!!!!! YOU HOLD ONTO THE PAST CHELSEA???? ALL MY FUCKING MISTAKES THAT I'VE DONE......YEAH I REGRET IT ALL.....NOW WHAT ABOUT YOU CHELSEA.....BECAUSE THERES A WHOLE SHIT LOAD OF PAST ON YOU THAT I COULD SAY BUT IT ISNT FOR PUBLIC VIEW..........UNDERSTAND THIS CHELSEA........I COULD DO THIS ALL NIGHT.......THRIVE ON THE PAST.......AND BRING UP EVERY LITTLE THING THAT YOU DID TO ME........BUT I JUST WANT TO KNOW ONE THING WAS IT A LIE??? DESPERATE OR WHAT?? OR SINCE YOU MOVED AWAY YOU WANT TO START OFF NEW.......WHERE PEOPLE DIDNT KNOW YOU.....AND YOU WERE TRYING TO FIND A REASON TO DESTROY ME AND BRING UP THE PAST THAT WEEK AND JUST TO GET RID OF ME.....BECAUSE OVER THERE YOUR EASY ACCESS IN THAT TRAILER PARK........WOOOOOOOOOO WEEEEE DUSTIN LIKES THAT I BET TOO.........DAMN I'D LIKE IT TOO IF A GIRL CAME TO MY EVERYDAY ALL HOURS OF THE NIGHT WHEN I HAD A GIRLFRIEND........REMIND ME TO SHAKE HIS HAND WHEN I SEE HIM.....(BUT WAIT....HAVENT TALKED TO YOU IN LIKE A YEAR SO HE MIGHT HAVE DROPPED HER FOR YOU) HA.......I DOUBT IT.......DOES HE EVEN HAVE TO CHELSEA?? LMAO.....BECAUSE YOU'RE HIS ANYWAYS YOU PRACTICALLY LIVE WITH HIM.....HAHAHAHAHAHA LMAO THIS IS FUNNY CHELSEA.........DO YOU GET MAD AT HIM AND BITCH HIM OUT FOR HAVING ANOTHER GIRL??? BECAUSE DAMN YOU TALK SHIT TO ME LAST WEEK BECAUSE OF TABBI AND IM NOT EVEN WITH YOU.......WHAT ARE YOU TRYING TO DO CHELSEA??? HAVE 2 GUYS IN DIFFERENT STATES LMAO.....WELL I WONT LIE TO YOU YOU HAVE ME......BUT HIM....SOUNDS LIKE HE HAS YOU.......HES HAD YOU FOR AWHILE NOW LOL.....HAS HE USED (OHH IM GOING TO BREAK UP WITH HER JUST GIVE ME TIME) ON YOU YET???????? =)) ANYWAYS CHELSEA.......I COULD COMPLETELY TAKE YOU DOWN TALK SHIT TO YOU ALL NIGHT GO ON AND ON.......MAKE YOU FEEL BAD (HA I DOUBT IT) BUT ALL THAT UP THERE ^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^ IS PAST ISNT IT???? OR IS IT?? SEE I COULD DO IT ALL NIGHT.......BUT I DONT CHELSEA.....NOT WHEN I TALKED TO YOU........AND NOW.....YOU TALK SHIT TO ME IN LIVEJOURNALS.......WE CAN PLAY THIS GAME IF YOU LIKE.......HELL ME AND MEGAN DONE IT.......OR WOULD YOU RATHER DO THE SARAH EXPERIENCE YOU'RE DOING IT RIGHT NOW.....KEEPING ME ON THE SIDE WHILE WITH DUSTIN WITHOUT TELLING ME THAT YOU DIDNT WANT ME.......I HAD TO TRACK YOU DOWN IN ORDER TO TELL YOU THAT I WAS MOVING IT.......THATS SAD CHELSEA.....IT REALLY IS.......YOU DIDNT WANT ME TO TALK SHIT TO YOU LIKE I DID MEGAN.......WELL I HAVENT YET.....BUT DAMN YOU'RE GOING A GOOD ROUTE.....BECAUSE SARAH ADDAIR.....FORGET MEGAN.....SHES A WHORE.....SARAH PROBABLY DID THE WORST TO ME BECAUSE SHE LIED.......AND MADE ME BELIEVE OTHER THINGS WITHOUT TELLING ME THAT SHE WANTED THE OTHER GUYS.....LIKE YOU WERE DOING.....AND I HATE THAT!!!! THATS THE WORSE THING YOU COULD DO TO ME.......THAT IS SAD CHELSEA........TO BE COMPARED TO THOSE TWO GIRLS.........THAT REALLY IS.....AND HERE TO THINK I ACTUALLY THOUGHT YOU WERE THE ONE.......ALL SWEET AND INNOCENT.......AWWWW....YEAH....HAHAHA I THOUGHT WRONG........BUT NOW IM GOING ON TO THE NEXT DAYS.......IF YOU HAVENT ALREADY CHECK OUT YOUR JOURNAL....OHH AND CHELSEA.......I LOVE YOU.......NO MATTER HOW BAD I FEEL AND HOW PISSED I GET.......FOR NOW I LOVE YOU.......BUT IM TRYING TO GET OVER YOU.....THATS ALL I CAN SAY.....I MEAN HELL WHO COULD BLAME ME.....
YOU'RE EX BF/REBOUND BOY/# WHATEVER ON THE SIDE GUY,
BRAD.
Aug 1st, 2005
Well after my big war I went to Tabbi's around 6 and played ball until about 9:00 and then I went and spent the last hour I had with Tabbi.....then I had to leave.....I came home here and talked to Tabbi some more and stuff and then I sit up all night and thought about this shit you know....then I got on here and typed it all.....but Im ok now.......still a little mad going through one of my moods again.....I hate this....I might try and lay down now maybe....and Chelsea.....when you read this I want you to leave me a comment ok........and dont go crazy and cuss and shit.."Fuck fuck fuck fuck gd this gd that fuck fuck fuck" yeah.....try to calm your new self for once.....if you can tell the old Chelsea I said hi and that I miss her really bad and that I would give anything to get her back.....ok Im gone on that one Im breaking down again....leave comments
Thanks,
Brad
July 29th, 2005
Well I was dads this day still yet (Kay didnt leave yet lol) I stayed up all night Im pretty sure and did nothing but talk on the computer.....fun huh? lol
July 30th, 2005
I was at dads until about 6 and then David came and took me to Tabbi's I stayed there until about 9:30 and them mom came and picked me up I played basketball pretty much while I was up there lol.......me and Tabbi didnt have much time to do talk or anything because my mother comes to fast!!!!! lol.....but this night into the early morning came a big decision.....but it happened at 12 something so I'll go to that one lol.
July 31st, 2005
At exactly 12:00 am I decided that enough was enough.......I took enough shit....I had so many bad dreams.......empty feelings loss of appetite and shit like that........so I decided that I wasnt going to bed until I got ahold of Chelsea.....so I got Tabbi on 3 way and called her number (since her dad wont let me talk to her if he answered I was going to get Tabbi to ask for him) well he answered and Tabbi asked where Chelsea was........he said she was at Dustin's hmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm..........at 12:00 am on a Tuesday Night into Wednesday morning.........now how many people 13 years old gets to do that now days??.......HAHAHA.......well........guess what I did....:D.......I told Tabbi that I would call her back that I was going to get that fuckers number and call her ass over there......(at this point I was pissed off) well I got his number and I called Tabbi back on 3 way and I told her that if anyone answered other than Chelsea to ask for Chelsea and we called.....Dustin answered and Tabbi asked for her.....well as soon as Chelsea got the phone I said "We need to talk." she said "How did you get this number." I said "I have my ways."...and at this point....I just went off.....I didnt get crazy mad and start screaming but I dont remember anything I said.....but I do remember what I called to ask her.....I remember asking what did she want and if she still loved me.....and she said can you call me back.......and I said no I need to know now and I started saying more stuff and then finally she said......."I dont know" and then I said well Im going to get over you and she said ok and I said bye.......click........well now after that was over........shewwww I got off the phone and damn.......you talk about pain.....Im glad Tabbi was there for me to talk to me on the phone.......after all that or I would have broke down.....but she has really helped me through this........and Chelsea if you read this if you're not busy with Dustin or all your other guys.......yeah Tabbi was on the phone with me when I called you because I didnt want your dad not telling me where you were......so I got Tabbi to ask him and Dustin when I called.......and Yeah Chelsea.....Tabbi was on there when I told you that I loved you........hmmmmmmmm Chelsea.......why did you want me to call you back anyways??? Busy??? or didnt want to let Dustin know who you were talking to.......Im sorry for that....I know what its like to be interrupted......and Tabbi heard me tell you that I loved you....and all you put on your yahoo messenger was "I guess" when I told you that........wow Chelsea........thats love........it really is.......do you know what I've been doing all this morning Chelsea (Aug. 2nd at 7 in the morning) reading our history on this computer.......it goes all the way back in February you know when we first met and started talking.....since you dwell on the past and shit Chelsea........do you know what you told me TWO WEEKS before me and you started talking???.......you said you were desperate and you were trying to figure out who to date.....Wesley or Lawrence........thats nice Chelsea.....I never read our past because I let it go....but all the times you made me feel bad because I told you Ricky helped me get hooked up with you because you said I did it because of pity.......WELL CHELSEA.......YOU WERE DESPERATE!!!!!!!!!!! IS THAT WHAT I WAS CHELSEA????? WHOS BEEN LIVING A FUCKING LIE NOW CHELSEA RAE???!!!!!!! WHO!!!!!!!!? I read the shit on this computer........NOT ONCE did you say you liked me you were talking about all kinds of other guys.....Bradley Kelly Lawrence Wesley people like that.....and this was 2 weeks before me and you started talking.......then we started dating about a week after we started talking.......now I want you to really think about all this Chelsea Jewell.......you can think what you want.....Im going back and forth back and forth back and forth between you and Tabbi..........ARE YOU REALLY THAT STUPID.......WHY THE FUCK WOULD I SIT IN A DAMN HOUSE ALL FUCKING DAY AND WAIT ON A DAMN PHONE CALL THATS NOT GOING TO COME BECAUSE SOMEONE IS TOOOOOOO BUSY DOING OTHER THINGS WITH OTHER GUYS!!!!!!!!!! NOW CHELSEA.......I GOT A QUESTION FOR YOU??? HAVE YOU REALLY EVEN LOVED ME? I REMEMBER WHEN YOU CRIED ON MY SHOULDER WHEN WE WERE LAYING IN THE BED AND YOU TOLD ME THAT YOU NEVER WANTED TO LOSE ME.....BUT THEN YOU TELL ME THAT YOU CAN MAKE YOURSELF FAKE CRY??? THAT MAKES ME THINK CHELSEA.......WAS ALL THIS FAKE??????? WERE YOU DESPERATE WHEN YOU GOT WITH ME??? AND THEN YOU JUST GREW TO LIKE ME?? IS THAT WHAT IT WAS CHELSEA??? WHAT WAS IT???? YOU GAVE THE FIRST GUY WHO CAME ALONG A CHANCE??? BECAUSE CHELSEA........YOU NEVER REALLY TOLD ME THAT YOU LIKED ME.....I HEARD IT FROM OTHER PEOPLE.....I WAS ON THE PHONE ONE TIME WHEN TISHA CALLED YOU ON 3 WAY WHEN ME AND HER WAS TALKING.......AT ONE TIME....YOU ADMITTED THAT YOU DIDNT LIKE ME.......BUT YOU TALKED SHIT TO TISHA FOR TALKING TO ME.........UHHH OHHH....WAS THAT A LIE???? CHELSEA JEWELL LIED TO ME BEFORE OMG!!!!!!!!! YOU HOLD ONTO THE PAST CHELSEA???? ALL MY FUCKING MISTAKES THAT I'VE DONE......YEAH I REGRET IT ALL.....NOW WHAT ABOUT YOU CHELSEA.....BECAUSE THERES A WHOLE SHIT LOAD OF PAST ON YOU THAT I COULD SAY BUT IT ISNT FOR PUBLIC VIEW..........UNDERSTAND THIS CHELSEA........I COULD DO THIS ALL NIGHT.......THRIVE ON THE PAST.......AND BRING UP EVERY LITTLE THING THAT YOU DID TO ME........BUT I JUST WANT TO KNOW ONE THING WAS IT A LIE??? DESPERATE OR WHAT?? OR SINCE YOU MOVED AWAY YOU WANT TO START OFF NEW.......WHERE PEOPLE DIDNT KNOW YOU.....AND YOU WERE TRYING TO FIND A REASON TO DESTROY ME AND BRING UP THE PAST THAT WEEK AND JUST TO GET RID OF ME.....BECAUSE OVER THERE YOUR EASY ACCESS IN THAT TRAILER PARK........WOOOOOOOOOO WEEEEE DUSTIN LIKES THAT I BET TOO.........DAMN I'D LIKE IT TOO IF A GIRL CAME TO MY EVERYDAY ALL HOURS OF THE NIGHT WHEN I HAD A GIRLFRIEND........REMIND ME TO SHAKE HIS HAND WHEN I SEE HIM.....(BUT WAIT....HAVENT TALKED TO YOU IN LIKE A YEAR SO HE MIGHT HAVE DROPPED HER FOR YOU) HA.......I DOUBT IT.......DOES HE EVEN HAVE TO CHELSEA?? LMAO.....BECAUSE YOU'RE HIS ANYWAYS YOU PRACTICALLY LIVE WITH HIM.....HAHAHAHAHAHA LMAO THIS IS FUNNY CHELSEA.........DO YOU GET MAD AT HIM AND BITCH HIM OUT FOR HAVING ANOTHER GIRL??? BECAUSE DAMN YOU TALK SHIT TO ME LAST WEEK BECAUSE OF TABBI AND IM NOT EVEN WITH YOU.......WHAT ARE YOU TRYING TO DO CHELSEA??? HAVE 2 GUYS IN DIFFERENT STATES LMAO.....WELL I WONT LIE TO YOU YOU HAVE ME......BUT HIM....SOUNDS LIKE HE HAS YOU.......HES HAD YOU FOR AWHILE NOW LOL.....HAS HE USED (OHH IM GOING TO BREAK UP WITH HER JUST GIVE ME TIME) ON YOU YET???????? =)) ANYWAYS CHELSEA.......I COULD COMPLETELY TAKE YOU DOWN TALK SHIT TO YOU ALL NIGHT GO ON AND ON.......MAKE YOU FEEL BAD (HA I DOUBT IT) BUT ALL THAT UP THERE ^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^ IS PAST ISNT IT???? OR IS IT?? SEE I COULD DO IT ALL NIGHT.......BUT I DONT CHELSEA.....NOT WHEN I TALKED TO YOU........AND NOW.....YOU TALK SHIT TO ME IN LIVEJOURNALS.......WE CAN PLAY THIS GAME IF YOU LIKE.......HELL ME AND MEGAN DONE IT.......OR WOULD YOU RATHER DO THE SARAH EXPERIENCE YOU'RE DOING IT RIGHT NOW.....KEEPING ME ON THE SIDE WHILE WITH DUSTIN WITHOUT TELLING ME THAT YOU DIDNT WANT ME.......I HAD TO TRACK YOU DOWN IN ORDER TO TELL YOU THAT I WAS MOVING IT.......THATS SAD CHELSEA.....IT REALLY IS.......YOU DIDNT WANT ME TO TALK SHIT TO YOU LIKE I DID MEGAN.......WELL I HAVENT YET.....BUT DAMN YOU'RE GOING A GOOD ROUTE.....BECAUSE SARAH ADDAIR.....FORGET MEGAN.....SHES A WHORE.....SARAH PROBABLY DID THE WORST TO ME BECAUSE SHE LIED.......AND MADE ME BELIEVE OTHER THINGS WITHOUT TELLING ME THAT SHE WANTED THE OTHER GUYS.....LIKE YOU WERE DOING.....AND I HATE THAT!!!! THATS THE WORSE THING YOU COULD DO TO ME.......THAT IS SAD CHELSEA........TO BE COMPARED TO THOSE TWO GIRLS.........THAT REALLY IS.....AND HERE TO THINK I ACTUALLY THOUGHT YOU WERE THE ONE.......ALL SWEET AND INNOCENT.......AWWWW....YEAH....HAHAHA I THOUGHT WRONG........BUT NOW IM GOING ON TO THE NEXT DAYS.......IF YOU HAVENT ALREADY CHECK OUT YOUR JOURNAL....OHH AND CHELSEA.......I LOVE YOU.......NO MATTER HOW BAD I FEEL AND HOW PISSED I GET.......FOR NOW I LOVE YOU.......BUT IM TRYING TO GET OVER YOU.....THATS ALL I CAN SAY.....I MEAN HELL WHO COULD BLAME ME.....
YOU'RE EX BF/REBOUND BOY/# WHATEVER ON THE SIDE GUY,
BRAD.
Aug 1st, 2005
Well after my big war I went to Tabbi's around 6 and played ball until about 9:00 and then I went and spent the last hour I had with Tabbi.....then I had to leave.....I came home here and talked to Tabbi some more and stuff and then I sit up all night and thought about this shit you know....then I got on here and typed it all.....but Im ok now.......still a little mad going through one of my moods again.....I hate this....I might try and lay down now maybe....and Chelsea.....when you read this I want you to leave me a comment ok........and dont go crazy and cuss and shit.."Fuck fuck fuck fuck gd this gd that fuck fuck fuck" yeah.....try to calm your new self for once.....if you can tell the old Chelsea I said hi and that I miss her really bad and that I would give anything to get her back.....ok Im gone on that one Im breaking down again....leave comments
Thanks,
Brad