emo moment
okay okay this is rediculous.
why do i always freak out and think that people hate me when they arent talking? like right now im no joke about two steps away from crying because fucking lucas isnt talking to me. and if i somehow fucked that up im going to be so mad. really i cant do any better than him, and i never will. and the way i see it all ive done so far is been really sweet to him and made sure to make him feel better and not stressed about me but i cant deal with not talking to him, sometimes he talks to me all day other times he doesnt talk to me at all like today and i get worried that he hates me and idont know why he would really, like theres no reason he should hate me. i mean would you hate some one who just tells you how perfect and amazing you are and how lucky they are to be friends with you? idk maybe its a boy thing. but i cant stop thinking about him and i probably wont, and its not just some regular zoe likes a boy thing its a zoe has a crush on a boy thing and that doesnt happen to me ever and you can ask any of my friends that. i hook up with a boy and we talk for a while and then i forget about them or find some reason to hate them. and i just cant deal with even thinking about lucas not liking me anymore cause id be, crushed so bad. but like reall he has no reason to hate me hes probably just busy, i mean he has a life but why cant he take like two seconds out of his life and text me and say hi or anything, i dont get it. i hate this. i hate feeling like this and i hate not knowing how some one else is feeling.
im just. so confused and so aggravated and ill probably wake up at 3am worried and have a text from lucas saying that he was sorry and that he was just busy. but i cant deal with that. i wish i just, didnt talk to people and iwish that ididnt care about him at all.
i fucking hate this.
why do i always freak out and think that people hate me when they arent talking? like right now im no joke about two steps away from crying because fucking lucas isnt talking to me. and if i somehow fucked that up im going to be so mad. really i cant do any better than him, and i never will. and the way i see it all ive done so far is been really sweet to him and made sure to make him feel better and not stressed about me but i cant deal with not talking to him, sometimes he talks to me all day other times he doesnt talk to me at all like today and i get worried that he hates me and idont know why he would really, like theres no reason he should hate me. i mean would you hate some one who just tells you how perfect and amazing you are and how lucky they are to be friends with you? idk maybe its a boy thing. but i cant stop thinking about him and i probably wont, and its not just some regular zoe likes a boy thing its a zoe has a crush on a boy thing and that doesnt happen to me ever and you can ask any of my friends that. i hook up with a boy and we talk for a while and then i forget about them or find some reason to hate them. and i just cant deal with even thinking about lucas not liking me anymore cause id be, crushed so bad. but like reall he has no reason to hate me hes probably just busy, i mean he has a life but why cant he take like two seconds out of his life and text me and say hi or anything, i dont get it. i hate this. i hate feeling like this and i hate not knowing how some one else is feeling.
im just. so confused and so aggravated and ill probably wake up at 3am worried and have a text from lucas saying that he was sorry and that he was just busy. but i cant deal with that. i wish i just, didnt talk to people and iwish that ididnt care about him at all.
i fucking hate this.