(no subject)
finally my computer is fixed. i haven't done anything with this is so long that no one will remember it exsists. but that's kinda cool b/c i don't have to worry about embarassing myself or offending anyone else.
but anyway.
recently i've been thinking about one of my friends. Well actually she drives me totally crazy but we used to be best friends. And i wish so much that we could be friends again, but i know she's changed too much. i don't like her anymore. But if she were like her old self i would love to be friends with her. Or maybe i've changed and not her but either way things are too different between us now. I think i just miss having a best friend like i did when we were close. becauses i'll always have sarah-and she really is my best friend. But even though she only lives like 30 minutes away, that's still too far away sometimes. especially when neither of us can drive. But still i want a best friend like close by. I have kirstie and kasey and i love them both very very much, but no matter what they'll always love each other more than they love me. They go on vacation together and to the movies together and shopping together and even tho i'm invited sometimes i'm usually the "maybe we could invite amanda?"And i understand that they're best friends and i'm ok with that. And the last thing i'd want to do would be tear them apart and i definently don't want to not be friends with them. It's just i can't go out with just kasey or just kirstie. If i'm with one its a given that the other is of course going to come too. But i'm not necessary to them like they are to each other. but that's neat and i don't want them to change i just want a friend like that. sarah has a friend at her school like that and i had one here until last year. But I'm just now starting to miss that friendship.