not in a good place right now
earlier this past week a i found out that mr. pilon died. he was like a grandfather to me. it didnt really hit me until i had to go to the wake on friday. there were sooooo many people there for him. we were waitin in line for over an hour
before i even got to the casket. i didnt think i would ever get so emotional about it either. i've been to a wake before buthis one was soo different. i realized how different my life would be without him. i made it thro the wake tho.
saturday morning my mom and i went to the funeral. it was so nice. he planned everything out on his own and it was just beautiful. there were about 50 cars in the persession to the church and to the cemetery. it was so sad. i really broke down when i heard the bag pips playing. seeing my mom and my aunts so upset really got to me too. at the cemetery they had military honors too. that was sad. everything was just so beautidful tho.
it made me really realize how precious everyone in my life really is. epcially my mom and dad..ron and janice. i really dont ever want to see any of them go.
i have this huge pratical tomorrow. and i was planning on studying all weekend but i didnt think that i was going to be so upset either. so i didnt get to study at all. and i tried studying early and i just cant concentrate. its so bad. im so fucked. i just wish i could start this semester over. i would do so much so differently. but i cant. only 4 and a half more weeks until im at home.
im prolly gunna hafta take sum of these classes over in the summer, i dont think im going to pass. which really sucks because im not used to failing.. uhh.
im going to bed. and i dont want to wake up in the morning.. because i know i have to go to that pratical.. and BOMB it..
im goin to wrk out tomorrow that usually makes me feel better.
before i even got to the casket. i didnt think i would ever get so emotional about it either. i've been to a wake before buthis one was soo different. i realized how different my life would be without him. i made it thro the wake tho.
saturday morning my mom and i went to the funeral. it was so nice. he planned everything out on his own and it was just beautiful. there were about 50 cars in the persession to the church and to the cemetery. it was so sad. i really broke down when i heard the bag pips playing. seeing my mom and my aunts so upset really got to me too. at the cemetery they had military honors too. that was sad. everything was just so beautidful tho.
it made me really realize how precious everyone in my life really is. epcially my mom and dad..ron and janice. i really dont ever want to see any of them go.
i have this huge pratical tomorrow. and i was planning on studying all weekend but i didnt think that i was going to be so upset either. so i didnt get to study at all. and i tried studying early and i just cant concentrate. its so bad. im so fucked. i just wish i could start this semester over. i would do so much so differently. but i cant. only 4 and a half more weeks until im at home.
im prolly gunna hafta take sum of these classes over in the summer, i dont think im going to pass. which really sucks because im not used to failing.. uhh.
im going to bed. and i dont want to wake up in the morning.. because i know i have to go to that pratical.. and BOMB it..
im goin to wrk out tomorrow that usually makes me feel better.