SPN Fic: Lord of the Holes

[big_pink]

I wrote this in honour of my good pal Kimonkey7 having finished Fortress and it being such an excellent bloody fic…what’s that? Oh, she hasn’t finished it yet? What’s up with that? Dear lord, that real life thing must be a bitch! Okay, I got her in trouble all excited the last time I suggested golf!fic, and so it’s pretty much my turn, isn’t it? Nothing

Comments

[kimonkey7]

If it were anatomically possible, I might want to have your babies. Big, giant, wide-mouthed babies with ISSUES.

LMFAO. Oh, my God. I just...Dean making children cry. While playing mini-golf. I have to check the claendar, because this feels like my BIRTHDAY.

Do you know Canadian actor Bruce Greenwood? Lovely guy. I interviewed him some years ago...right after he made 'The Sweet Hereafter' - he's got two fake front teeth. Beautiful. Really nice guy. Popped them out for me right there. We laughed for ten minutes.

Who's next? Is it lemmy's turn now?

There must be more golf!fic. You don't just WALK IN TO GOLF!FIC.

[big_pink]

DEAR LORD. Nonononono. I want to have your babies...Bruce Greenwood?! You interviewed Bruce Greenwood! *swoons* Man, he's lovely. And the Sweet Hereafter was just...guh. Great Canadian cinema (stop laughing already). I did not know his two front teeth were false. But this is actually based on going into a club with my ex, and there was blacklight, and I was, 'What the fuck is up with your TEETH?' He'd neglected to tell me that one of the front ones was false. I totally went indoor mini-golfing this weekend (alas, not at one so charmingly themed as Lord of the Holes. Lord of the Balls. That would have been good, too, actually. No, the one I went to was freaky weird, with underwater shit but knights in a castle too, so. Whatever.)

I think it's Lemmypie's turn.

Take your time with Fortress -- this was meant as a gift, not a prod!

[kimonkey7]

No, really. Best interview I ever did. I mentioned to him what a great job they did withhis teeth in TGH, and he smiled, popped 'em right out. Said he lost 'em in a bar fight. He was gorgeous. And really funny. He gave me his home phone number after, in case I had follow-up questions. I totally should have stalked him. THAT would be a story, huh?

No, Lord of the Holes is PERFECT. But I could have used some vomit. Or peeing. I'm like that. Especially since, you know, HOLES. But I digress. As I often do.

*is off to beat the crap out of Dean one last time*

[lemmypie]

Oh baby jebusss. I'm thinkng driving range fic? Shake things up a little.........

I want to have twin babies one for both of you!!!!!

[big_pink]

Driving range works. You gotta let it come to you, though, right? I wasn't PLANNING on writing golf!fic this weekend, but then we went minigolfing and there it was!

[kimonkey7]

I'm mildly disturbed by the continual referencing of my name and my dangling participle of an unfinished story. What is it with you? Poking me like that, when you could be poking Lemmy?

Because it's lemmy whot needs to be poked.

I imagine if Dean got himself on an actual DRIVING range, he might really dig it. He's a power-slammin', all-out, send it to hell kind of guy. ANd what better sport for a guy who looks like Dean to shark?

I mean...Dean on a range on a Saturday morning? Looking like a moron in his machine boots and leather jacket? And then John Lunchpail and his 2.5 sons from hell show up and...

It almost writes itself.

Unlike this last fucking chapter of Fortress.

[lemmypie]

The man next to him is wearing pink and purple plaid pants a pink shirt and Dean is all. "Sam get the holy water, the only explination for a man dressing like that is possesion."

[kimonkey7]

And in detail, really, you need to describe the choke-up...when Dean's standing over the ball, and the club ticks up a few times, and he shifts his weight from foot to foot and wiggles his ass before the muscles in his back stretch and twist and pull with his swing...

Because that right there is a mighty pretty sight, don't you think?

Especially the ass wiggle. :)

[lemmypie]

I understand that you can't FORCE a golf!fic it's an organic process. I'm just gonna have to threaten myself with brick pants pictures....