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It had been pretty quiet around the hotel, Faith had been pretty much sticking to her room, which I had to say was a relief and troubling at the same time. Angel had yet to go in and talk to her and I really didn't know what to say to her, other than what I already had. At least she was still here. That was good in someone's book somewhere. I
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My eyes follow her wearily around the room as she rambles on. Who the bloody hell is Dennis? She's already sharing her apartment with someone else? "Who is Dennis? I ask weakly, trying to get in a word edgewise. I'm not to certain I like being around anyone right now. I'd rather be left alone. Unless it's Cordelia. I mean she knows what happened, she was there. I don't have to pretend in front of her, hide anything. She knows I'm scared. That I'm a...coward. I suppose everyone was right after all. Coward. Failure.
Sighing, I put down the scone I'm trying to eat, not that I'm actually hungry for once, and look at her. I'm about to tell thank her for her offer but 'no, really, it's not necessary'. I'm taken aback once again by the pleading tone in her voice. And I'm not at all happy with the fact that she'll be staying at the Hyperion with...her. I rub a shaky hand over my forehead and sigh again, pain stabbing through my ribs reminding me that I'm not really up to refusing. "Alright," I tell her with a defeated tone. "I don't know why this is so important to you, but if it makes you feel better I'll stay at your place. I just hope it won't bother this...dennis fellow to much." With a wince I slump down in the chair and blink at her.
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"It will make me feel better, and you. You'll love it." I say sitting up on the edge of my seat. "Dennis right. Well, he's... he's my resident ghost. He's really sweet and really amazing with a loofa. That probably sounded really... bad, but he is and he's nice. He is a busy ghost. He's not so big on visitors, but I'll convince him it's safe for you to be there."
I stand up and look around, wanting to go right now, he looked really tired and in pain. I feel badly for him. I start to gather his belongings and putting them carefully into his bag. I finish up and look at him, putting the bag over my shoulder.
"Unless you have other things, let's head over there right now." I say, nodding. "I think it'd be best if we got out of here. You need more pain killers before we cab it?"
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Coward.
Getting up on unsteady legs, I shake my head again. "No, I'm fine," I lie to her. Right as rain, that's me. No problem here. I glance around the room to see if she missed anything. Not that there was much too miss. Everything I have fits into the one sodding bag and the saddle bags of my motorcycle. The rest is all in the big vault at the station. I guess I should go get those too later. Just some books.
Ignoring the stabs of pain when I finally manage to get up, I give her a weak smile. I reach out to push up my glasses, once again remembering that...she...crushed them, quickly I revert my hands to reach out and take over the bag. "Let me help you. Oh..." Looking at her thoughtfully I glance over her shoulder out the window. "My motorcycle," I mutter. Damn, how are we going to get that over to her apartment?
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"Your- oh no, uh uh. We are so not riding on that thing like we are right now." I shake my head and look out into the parking lot, seeing the bike parked. "Hmm... I have an idea, he owes me anyway right?" I move to the phone and pick it up, dialing Doyle. Answering machine. I smile at Wesley.
"Doyle! Thank god you're there, do you think you could come and pick up Wesley's bike at his hotel... the Blue Palm?" I say into the receiver after the machine beeps. "You can, that's great! It's in the parking lot, okay? Okay, thanks bye." I set the receiver down and turn back to Wesley who's looking at me suspiciously.
"What? I can't give him time to answer, he'd say no. Now that I expect him, he'll come." I say shrugging and hoisting the bag back up to my shoulder. "Let's get a cab, there was one out in the parking lot when I came in." I walk past him to the door and pull it open, watching as he limps toward me.
"And as far as you helping me, how about you master walking first." I smile sweetly in my bitchy little way and wait for him just outside the door. "Let me help you, okay?" I gently put my arm around him, careful to avoid any broken things and still manage to help him to the cab in the parking lot. I give the cabby my address and we are off, finally pulling up at my apartment.
"Thanks for that enjoyable ride, really it's called air freshner." I smile smugly at the cab driver after I hand him the cash for the ride. "Well, this is it. Home sweet home." I walk to the door and pull it open, waiting for an injured Wesley to make it inside.
"Thank god for elevators." I say pushing the button as we stand and wait. "You'll like Dennis, he's great."
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The drive over is painful, since the bloody driver doesn' t really care where he's driving. Cordelia is keep up a steady stream of chatter though. I just nod at the appropriate time, or when I guess it's appropriate and try not to wince to much. Maybe I should've taken those damn pills. No, better keep them for when it gets really bed. I don't have the money for a follow up recipe.
"I can...walk," I mutter, remembering her remark from when we were still at the hotel. Well, limp, but I can move. Oh thank god, lifts. Yes, I'd rather not try to make it up any stairs. Yet. Not that I can't, because I can walk. And just how am I trying to kid here? I follow her toward her apartment, mustering up a small smile as she talks about this Dennis. I'm going to have to come up with a way to help with the rent and things. I mean, I'd be staying there and she'd be at the hotel. With...her, near that... Right, lets not think about that right now. It's not as if I can tell Cordy what to do or not. I can only ask she be careful. Very, very careful.
Leaning against the wall I wait for her to open the door. So far this is looking hundred times better then the rathole I was in. She pushes the door open and I push myself from the wall to follow her inside when the door slams closed again. "I'm sure I'll like Dennis," I nod wryly. "I'm not at all sure he's going to like me though." Why else would he slam the door closed? Assuming it was him. Though I can't think of anyone else who would.
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"Alright Dennis, he's a friend. He's here to stay for a bit, we both got hurt. Let him in now." I say annoyed. "Dennis." After a few moments pause the door swings open and Wesley is standing there with a look on his face. I move over to him and help him in, settling him down on the sofa, which is soft and kinda lumpy. But mine. All of this was mine. After leaving that hell hole called Sunnydale I got this place, it wasn't much but it was all I had. I paid for it myself too. I smiled proudly.
"Drink? I've got water and juice I'm sure. Milk, but it's probably expired." I walk into the kitchen and pop open my fridge. "Diet soda too. Questionable chicken that is ... " I smell it. "Going away now." I drop it in the garbage can and look around. The place is spik and span, Dennis is a good little house ghost. I put the kettle on and move back into the living room, sitting across from Wesley.
"Well, what do you think?" I smile and look around, crossing my legs. "Dennis, this is Wesley. Wesley, Dennis... but you can't really see him he's just sorta... here. It's odd. Anyway, you are welcome to sleep in my room, bed's comfy and all. I put on some water and I'll make you some tea, then I think I should head back to the Hyperion. I haven't talked to Angel in a while... see what's going on with Fa-" I stop and look at him, then get up and head for the kitchen. I stare at the kettle, waiting for it to boil.
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I listen as she keeps on talking, while keeping an eye out for this Dennis. "That's alright," I say softly. "I'm not much of an eater anyway. I'll get some things for you later today." Right, I'll walk to the nearest store and get her some food. As if I know what she likes. It's not as if I'm very hungry. At all. Especially not after...her. I don't even have any money. Nor would I be able to walk very far. But I'll get her some things dammit! I owe her at least that much.
I wait on the sofa for her, my hands with their fingers entwined almost painfully in my lap. "Err...he-hello, Dennis," I muster up a smile and nod into the thin air. "Nice to meet you." I'm talking to air. Suddenly I blink as a pen floats up and falls down again. I suppose that was Dennis. Fascinating. Turning back toward Cordelia I nod at her and smile a bit broader as she mentions tea. "Tea sounds heavenly." My smile fades and dies, as she nearly mentions...her. I quickly look away, my fingers wringing together painfully again. I can feel the cuts on my wrists pulling. Good, I can concentrate on that, not on the fact that Cordelia is going back to that...that...her.
"I'm aware that I can't stop you from...helping....her. But promise me you'll be careful. At least don't go near her again without Angel nearby?" I'm terrified the Sla...Faith...her name is Faith...I'm terrified that Faith will hurt her again.
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I look up at him as he says this, the tea kettle starting to scream. Screams that left my throat as I watched Wesley nearly get killed and felt my own deal of backhands and head smashings. I pull it off the stove and set it on the counter looking down at the tile. I grab a cup from the cupboard quietly and fill it with boiling poker water, dipping the tea bag into it and watching it bleed steep. I turn and move into the living room, carefully handing him his tea, and setting myself on the floor facing the couch.
"I will be careful. I promise." I say quietly, feeling myself waiver once again between helping Faith and trying to get her the hell out of the Hyperion. I don't understand why I was helping this wretched girl who had done nothing but cause grief and pain since she first showed her tail in Sunnydale. "I don't know what I'm doing Wesley, hell... half my life I've never known what I was doing. I saw her and- she's broken Wesley, and part of me hurts when I see the look in her eyes. The other part of me wants to scream and rip her hair out, telling her she deserves this feeling. Deserves."
I stand up and walk over to the window looking out, chewing on my thumbnail, blinking to avoid crying. I'm not going to cry over her again, she's not worth it. She's a horrible broken little girl and she needs to feel love pain. I look back over my shoulder and then back out the window.
"I have been around her without Angel, she... she never hurt me." I say numbly, watching as a bird perches on the telephone line outside my window. "She could have but she didn't. I think I'm safe." God I hope I am, but I slept last night and she didn't come for me. No knife at my throat. Nothing.
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I suppose no one bothered to look for the girl behind the Slayer either. The person behind Faith. I was to busy seeing her as a weapon, a Slayer and nothing else. My up-bringing being getting in the way of seeing beyond that image. Seeing that little girl lost, crying out for help, crying out for attention. Of course it didn't help that she was constantly in the shadow of Buffy Summers. Just as I was constantly in the shadow of one Rupert Giles.
Sighing, I get up, it's a bit of a struggle but I manage and join her at the window. Oh, nice view. Annoyed with myself I shake of that thought and put a shaky hand on her shoulder. "Cordelia? I know you're confused, but-but if you've been around her without Angel and you're still... " Alive? In one piece? Standing? "...anyway. I saw how she reacted to you. If anyone has a chance to get through to her it will be you. I've every confidant in that."
Why the hell am I saying this? I don't care about Faith. She doesn't care about me right? No she doesn't. If it were up to her, I'd be dead now. Some way to cry for attention. "I suppose Faith being a Slayer this was the only way for her to cry out for help. It's what they do, what they're used off, their nature. Do violence is all they know. She never had a chance to learn anything else because no one showed her. " Oh marvelous, now I'm defending her too. "It's not an excuse I know this. And it doesn't make what she did right." And I still hate her. Right.
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I laugh and look up at him as he continues talking, feeling angry tears sting my eyes. It sounded like he was defending her too, we both felt we had wronged her somehow, and yet we both were ignorant to when.
"Damn right it doesn't." I say quietly and let out a sigh. "I highly doubt I'll be the one to get through to her, unless if by through you mean her fist going through me. That's the verb demonstration of her meaning of through." I roll my eyes and head over to the sofa, plopping down and wiping at my eyes. I look at Wesley and he looks like death warmed over, I really should let him rest.
"Alright, let me get out of your hair and let you rest." I say softly and stand up moving to him. "Take some meds and pass out, Dennis will keep things safe around here. Doyle will bring your motorcycle and I'll... come back in a couple of days, okay?" I set my hand on his arm and smile.
"Thanks Wesley."
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"You're never in the way. This is your apartment after all," I shrug and bite down on a cry when I feel my shoulder protest again. "Thank you for letting me stay here, I'm very grateful." She gives me one of those patent Cordelia Chase looks and huffs at me. Mustering up a shy smile I get up and follow her to the door. "Please ask this Doyle fellow to let me know when he drops of the motor. I'd like to thank him for his trouble." She nods at me again with that far to bright smile that makes me think something is not quite right there. Patting the hand on my arm I muster up a smile for her. "Don't thank me, Cordy." What is she thanking me for? For being a coward? For not having been able to help her out? For being such a bother? " I should be thanking you. I'll see you in a couple of days then. And please be careful," I plead softly.
The door closes behind her and I quickly lock it, sagging against it. My eyes glance around the apartment for a long time before another pen is flying in front of my face. "Oh sorry, Dennis. I hope you don't mind me staying here? I wouldn't want to impose." The pen goes from left to right. I take it that is a no? I suppose so. Pushing back from the door I limp over to the sofa again when a rattling sound draws my attention. The bottle of pills are in front of my face. "Errr...no, thank you Dennis. I'm fine. Really." The bottle rattles a little louder and I grab the pills with a resigned sigh.
Marvelous. I'm having a ghostly mother hen as a room mate. Narrowing my eyes I glance up into the thin air.
"You're not getting near me with that loofa in the shower though. Or...or anywhere in the shower for that matter."
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