Hey!
I apologize for always only coming around periodically. I really do love the internet and I do love LJ. But I also really love sleep!! lol
My days consist of waking up, working out, showering, go to work, come home, eat (unless I'm meeting friends for dinner), call up friends to hang out and sip some drinks, and come home late and go to bed, only waking up in the morning wishing I had skipped out on partying and gone to bed at 9 o'colock!!! lol
But anywhoses. I'm single now. Don't feel bad, it's not a sad story. And its not an interesting enough story to tell, so I won't even bore you with that. lol
I just really really enjoy being single, but LOVE company. you get what I mean? I like friends, buddys, one-nighters. (Hey I'm just being honest!!) I can honestly see myself as a runaway bride. Commitment doesn't "scare" me, but once I feel and once I realize I'm in a relationship that has me too sucked in, too "committed", too exclusive, I wake up and come to terms and realize I don't want that.
It happens everytime folks. And Ryan and I were open, we weren't monogamous. But something felt too exclusive. If that made sense. I suppose it's because I knew he wanted to be with me forever, possibly marriage, and I don't even want to think of that, and I couldn't lead him on. So it had to end. But we're not on bad terms. I still see him all the time, we hang out and drink. ANd point blank, if we're in the mood to fuck, we will. And anyway, he's okay with "us", he's not hurt (ok he was, but he's not overly hurt.)
I think he's relieved and ok just by knowing I didn't ditch him to go be exclusive with another guy, planning my future with him. Since I don't want that, and he knows I don't want that, Ryan is relieved, even though I'm not with him. You know what I mean?
My days consist of waking up, working out, showering, go to work, come home, eat (unless I'm meeting friends for dinner), call up friends to hang out and sip some drinks, and come home late and go to bed, only waking up in the morning wishing I had skipped out on partying and gone to bed at 9 o'colock!!! lol
But anywhoses. I'm single now. Don't feel bad, it's not a sad story. And its not an interesting enough story to tell, so I won't even bore you with that. lol
I just really really enjoy being single, but LOVE company. you get what I mean? I like friends, buddys, one-nighters. (Hey I'm just being honest!!) I can honestly see myself as a runaway bride. Commitment doesn't "scare" me, but once I feel and once I realize I'm in a relationship that has me too sucked in, too "committed", too exclusive, I wake up and come to terms and realize I don't want that.
It happens everytime folks. And Ryan and I were open, we weren't monogamous. But something felt too exclusive. If that made sense. I suppose it's because I knew he wanted to be with me forever, possibly marriage, and I don't even want to think of that, and I couldn't lead him on. So it had to end. But we're not on bad terms. I still see him all the time, we hang out and drink. ANd point blank, if we're in the mood to fuck, we will. And anyway, he's okay with "us", he's not hurt (ok he was, but he's not overly hurt.)
I think he's relieved and ok just by knowing I didn't ditch him to go be exclusive with another guy, planning my future with him. Since I don't want that, and he knows I don't want that, Ryan is relieved, even though I'm not with him. You know what I mean?