History beneath me
Today has been pretty ok. Didn't wake up until 3 pm, only because i didn't get home until 5 am and sleep by 5:30. Other than that, I am waiting now until midnight to go to a SICK college party and I can not keep my patience because I need to get out of this place (house).
I wanted to let everyone know the history all about me, but I pretty much summed it up in my ton fifteen list. An important thing I always explain is how I can never stay good to a boyfriend and if I did, they always seem to be more into me than I am into them. One ex beat some other guy down for talking to me, gave him stitches in his lip. Another ex shot himself while I was on the phone with him, *he did die, but was brought back... :)* and my current boyfriend had a gun pulled on him because he was pissed some other guy pushed me around. Now people wonder why it is SO hard for me to get attached to a guy or let a guy get attached to me. I think about it often and wonder if I should keep to myself for a while, but I guess the thought of not having a boyfriend makes me feel alone. Today I thought hard about it, but I thought to myself again, I am not quite as serious to him as I want to be, but from the past, I'm glad that things aren't the way they were with my boyfriend now as they were with past boyfriends. I hope to one day find the right one... but then again, don't we all. Whether it is now or in ten years, I will only wait for it, not look for the opportunity.
I wanted to let everyone know the history all about me, but I pretty much summed it up in my ton fifteen list. An important thing I always explain is how I can never stay good to a boyfriend and if I did, they always seem to be more into me than I am into them. One ex beat some other guy down for talking to me, gave him stitches in his lip. Another ex shot himself while I was on the phone with him, *he did die, but was brought back... :)* and my current boyfriend had a gun pulled on him because he was pissed some other guy pushed me around. Now people wonder why it is SO hard for me to get attached to a guy or let a guy get attached to me. I think about it often and wonder if I should keep to myself for a while, but I guess the thought of not having a boyfriend makes me feel alone. Today I thought hard about it, but I thought to myself again, I am not quite as serious to him as I want to be, but from the past, I'm glad that things aren't the way they were with my boyfriend now as they were with past boyfriends. I hope to one day find the right one... but then again, don't we all. Whether it is now or in ten years, I will only wait for it, not look for the opportunity.