Rain
It's raining outside. I'm stuck inside. Sounds like a perfect time to update my journal. Not like anyone reads this thing anywho. Past few days have been somewhat entertaining. Halo 2 tourny, having people over. Last night alone I had Shaun, Brian, Foster, Gary, Courtney, Destiny, and Katey over. Twas fun. But now it's back to the old aloneness thing. Just me sitting here having nothing to do but think (which everyone who knows me knows thats NOT a good thing). It's amazing how when you're bored you can think about everything but not really have any thoughts about it. Still jobless. All my friends have jobs. Cept me. I feel so useless. I've applied to almost 15 places and not even one call. Maybe I'm supossed to be the class failure that everyone thought might succeed. That's prolly it. Here I am almost 18 and don't even have a valid permit. Maybe something will pop up for me. I'm normally not that lucky. Everyone elses lives around me are changing a bunch. Gary's got a job, and it's changing him. I can tell already he's starting to be a more "responsible" person. Not a bad thing, I just never really liked change. Change has almost always been bad for me. Crystals got a new guy thing going on. Already going out I guess. Don't know much about the guy since she doesn't talk to me but I've decided if I don't know anything about him and I don't make any predictions, I can't be right. That probably doesn't make sense to any of you but it does for me. It's kind of like knowing someones going to get really hurt, and them not believing you. Then when it happens you're kinda like "HA!!! I WAS RIGHT!!!" but you feel like shit cuz the guys hurt now. Something similar. Well I'm home alone for the 12 days now (3 down, woo-hoo!) I encourage anyone to call me up, come over, kick my ass, rob me, or tie me to the back of a truck and drive it off a cliff. By all that I mean just do something that involves me so I'm not alone for 2 weeks. I don't know if any of you know what it feels like to have no friends and sit around the house by yourself all day, but I do. I know some of you may think you do but I've been there. 6th grade, expelled, no friends, no family all day, for 11 months. Not only that, but I didn't even have a single friend til 4th grade. You can even ask him. Gary. Just need stuff to do. Don't care who asks me. If I've talked to you before chances are I'm willing to hang out. But, I have no clue who I'm talking to since noone reads this thing. Poo. I'll update sometime soon. Maybe tomorrow depending on if anyone calls me. 466-0119 btw if you didn't know. I'll be the only one home so I'll be the only person picking up. Talk to everyone who won't read this later. Peace.