SORRY JAS I KNOW I'M EARLY BUT I GOT TOO EAGER AND I WANT TO BE FIRST
we now tell a story, a tale of two girls
we'll make it a rhyme, let's give it a whirl!
one will be red, one will be blue--
(though they do swap their colors, when they play TF2.)
it starts on a day when they are barely eighteen,
of the blue one the red was not particularly keen.
"she writes like a pro; she must be a tool,"
but this train of logic was quite like a fool's
no offense, dear red, but you were mistaken
and when blu imed red their worlds were both shaken!
"a junior in high school? no way, oh gee!
so am i, girl! that's totes way to be!"
and so began their whole, brand new story--
of acerb and bhujerba, one of great glory!
they had no fandoms in common,
or similar interests to date,
but it all came together
they were two good ol' mates.
some people thought, "oh, they just can't be straight!"
and before joining a game, red laid out the bait
"first base? home plate? blu and i are at bat!
--just kidding, dear chaps, we're just joining amat."
what fun! what jokes! sex euphemisms galore!
of the baseball variety, we particularly adore.
we were quite proud of red, what absolute shtick!
we are quite sure that they all just shat bricks.
"aki's my hubby, shinji's your boy,
the thought of it fills me with absolute joy!
to be honest i've already wetted my bedding;
we may as well go and just have a joint wedding."
together forever, they went to and fro
to any place in the world, in tandem they'd go
they met tons of friends--tons of guys, tons of gals
jake, marie, kaia, all five of 'em pals
but then time as time went, red started to wonder
if all of these times would just go all under.
"how long will this go? how long can this last?"
we'll now sink these worries deep into the past.
one in CA, the other in MASS,
neither of them timid, both a bit crass,
one of them eloquent, the other one lame,
finding it hard to craft words to fit with her aim.
but then she found poetry--a bit shitty, it's true
"though it's quite worth the shot," deeply thought blue.
for today is the birthday of the girl we call red
and she is the butter to this blue loaf of bread.
she's kind and she's cool; she's rough and she's tumble
"my ego's quite large," but she's truly quite humble.
she's what to her what? let's give this a spin.
to chie, she's yuki,
to saber, she's rin.
but analogies are cute for only so long,
and now we are closing to the end of this song.
to red, we must state, don't ever worry--
blue won't ever leave you, not in haste or a flurry.
an "internet friendship" is a dumb statement at best,
for blue to have known you, she truly is blessed.
they're best friends forever, of that do not doubt,
and this is a love that will never die out.
now at our conclusion, there's one thing to say:
happy birthday, dear red; have a wonderful day!