This I Believe
I've settle in at the Foxboro Unitarian Universalist Church. I guess I'm feeling member-ish, since I've signed on to make the stole for the minister when she gets ordained in March. Anyway, this weekend is a lay-led service based on the NPR series "This I Believe," in which people (famous and non-) read essays about their core values and beliefs. I thought I'd take a shot at verbalizing mine, and have volunteered to read at the service Sunday. This is what I wrote:
I believe in the MFQ: the Maximum Fun Quotient.
I first encountered the MFQ in college, where my friends and I played a wide variety of games. We noticed that people have different styles and approaches to game-playing. Some are very tied to the rules, eager to demonstrate their mastery of all the details, and unnerved if anyone tries to change the gameplay, to modify it to fit the players or the situation. Others - most people in fact - are certain that the point of a game is to win it. Why else keep score?
My friends and I tended to focus on the Maximum Fun Quotient, the idea that the point of a game is to enjoy playing it, and that each person's goal is not just to enjoy the game themselves, but to maximize the fun had by all. That an evening spent losing hilariously is far better than one spent crushing my opponents.
As I've continued through life, I've come to see that the MFQ need not apply only to playing games. Caring about enjoyment, not just for oneself, but also for those around, is part of many activities - planning a meal, choosing a movie - and I believe it's worth expanding. We don't have to join in on the daily rounds of Misery Poker that our society encourages. Yes, bad things large and small do happen, but so do good things, and our positive stories deserve equal time in our conversations. Once I started to focus more of my attention on pleasant experiences, I found myself increasingly inspired to actively create more of them. Grocery shopping may be a chore, but being friendly and offering random acts of helpfulness can make it an opportunity for pleasant interactions with total strangers, or at least befuddled gratitude. No one enjoys commuting, but I can at least reduce the stress by remembering that merging is a cooperative phenomenon. Meetings tend to be tedious - but I brought my knitting one day, and the next day half the faculty had brought theirs. And when I teach, I certainly see no reason why my lectures can't be both educational and laugh-out-loud entertaining.
My belief isn't that different from the old standbys: the Golden Rule, Be Nice, or, simply, “Share.” But the MFQ is special, because the center of it is “Fun.” At it's core is the belief that we are all here together for a limited time - let's have fun. Don't be so obsessed with the rules of daily life that you forget to live. Don't be swayed by the materialistic sense that society is keeping score, and we should all struggle to be the winner. You're not here to prove your grasp of the instruction manual; you're not here to win. You're here to play. Help each other have fun doing that.
I believe in the MFQ: the Maximum Fun Quotient.
I first encountered the MFQ in college, where my friends and I played a wide variety of games. We noticed that people have different styles and approaches to game-playing. Some are very tied to the rules, eager to demonstrate their mastery of all the details, and unnerved if anyone tries to change the gameplay, to modify it to fit the players or the situation. Others - most people in fact - are certain that the point of a game is to win it. Why else keep score?
My friends and I tended to focus on the Maximum Fun Quotient, the idea that the point of a game is to enjoy playing it, and that each person's goal is not just to enjoy the game themselves, but to maximize the fun had by all. That an evening spent losing hilariously is far better than one spent crushing my opponents.
As I've continued through life, I've come to see that the MFQ need not apply only to playing games. Caring about enjoyment, not just for oneself, but also for those around, is part of many activities - planning a meal, choosing a movie - and I believe it's worth expanding. We don't have to join in on the daily rounds of Misery Poker that our society encourages. Yes, bad things large and small do happen, but so do good things, and our positive stories deserve equal time in our conversations. Once I started to focus more of my attention on pleasant experiences, I found myself increasingly inspired to actively create more of them. Grocery shopping may be a chore, but being friendly and offering random acts of helpfulness can make it an opportunity for pleasant interactions with total strangers, or at least befuddled gratitude. No one enjoys commuting, but I can at least reduce the stress by remembering that merging is a cooperative phenomenon. Meetings tend to be tedious - but I brought my knitting one day, and the next day half the faculty had brought theirs. And when I teach, I certainly see no reason why my lectures can't be both educational and laugh-out-loud entertaining.
My belief isn't that different from the old standbys: the Golden Rule, Be Nice, or, simply, “Share.” But the MFQ is special, because the center of it is “Fun.” At it's core is the belief that we are all here together for a limited time - let's have fun. Don't be so obsessed with the rules of daily life that you forget to live. Don't be swayed by the materialistic sense that society is keeping score, and we should all struggle to be the winner. You're not here to prove your grasp of the instruction manual; you're not here to win. You're here to play. Help each other have fun doing that.