Combat baby, come back baby. Fight off the lethargy--don’t go quietly.

[whateverthemess]

Karrin Murphy is at a coffee shop near the Empress Theater. She has a stack of books in front of her--a number of them on mythology, with titles like The Myth of the Male Divine and Mythical Trickster Figures. The rest are case studies on organized teenage violence and books about the mythos of the Christian biblical angel. Murphy rubs her eyes.

Comments

[bythatmuch]

Max screams.

He's still jumpy from that monster thing a few weeks ago, and Tomei's sudden entrance was just enough to freak him the hell out.

"AHHHHHWHATTHE-"

Oh, wait a second. Max knows that guy! He relaxes a little, then squints at the fireplace. "Tomei?"

[marchforthedead]

Tomei yells back, though it's less a scream than a Deep and Manly Waaaugh of surprise. He twists around to gape at Max.

"Ah... Hello." He still has no idea what he's doing in the common room fireplace. He struggles out of it, grabbing on to the lintel to help himself upright.

[bythatmuch]

Part of Max's brain gives him an image of Tomei in a Santa suit.

It's not Christmas, Max.

"Are you okay? How far did you-" His eyes trail up the wall. The chimney must go up the entire building. How is Tomei not dead?

...maybe he's a zombie.

Cue the wary look.

[marchforthedead]

"I don't know." He peers up the chimney. "I was in the gym. Not up there."

When Tomei sees the look on Max's face, he eyeballs the man with much the same expression. "What?"

[bythatmuch]

"Oh." Well, that doesn't make any sense. "Okay."

The look on Max's face fades quickly. Zombies usually look... dead and decaying. He knows this because he's seen them in movies, and Tomei looks as handsome as ever very much alive.

"Hi, then?"

[marchforthedead]

"Hello." He grunts and straightens up, taking a proper look at Max. ...Who looks kind of haggard, come to think of it. "What happened?"

He looms over Max in that accidental way that Tomei looms over everyone, inspecting the other man. He pokes a thumb against one of the shadows under Max's eyes. "You look bad."

[bythatmuch]

Max goes slightly wide-eyed at Tomei's touching of his face and just sort of sits there with a deer in the headlights look. "Um." He swallows. "I - there was a monster. It almost killed me. I ALMOST DIED."

Ah, yes.

There's the Max we're used to, yelling like a crazy.

[marchforthedead]

Tomei tugs back, eying Max like he miiight be a little crazy. "Monster?"

In his world, there aren't monsters so much as there are very dangerous animals that people don't want to deal with. ...There's also a war on, so the whole almost-dying thing has something less of an impact than it otherwise might. "I'm sorry? You're alive, yeah?"

[bythatmuch]

"Monster," Max repeats, nodding. "It had tentacles." He demonstrates this with noodle-arms and a growlyface. "And it grabbed me and swung me around and tried to KILL ME. I could have died, Tomei. DIED."

But Max doesn't want to look like a total pansy, so he quickly adds: "I bit it."

HE IS MANLY.

[marchforthedead]

Tomei scratches the back of his head and ducks to hide a smile. "Ah... Very brave. You killed it?"

He's trying to picture Max killing a monster. He really is. It's nooot quite working.

[bythatmuch]

"...well, no. Some woman shot it and then I fainted and she carried me... back... here... um."

There is a moment of silence as Max runs a hand over his face. Then: "I could've killed it if I had a gun or a flamethrower or something, you know!"

[marchforthedead]

He's not laughing at you, Max. The sheepish-sounding chuckle is entirely unrelated, he swears. "Guns... Flamethrower?" He shakes his head. "Makes everyone dangerous and no one skilled, I think. A sword, a forged weapon, that's part of you."

Tomei taps a finger against his chest. "It's strength."

He shrugs and scratches his head again. "But, here is different, I guess? And you're alive because of guns, so." He frowns thoughtfully. "You should learn a weapon."

[bythatmuch]

"I have weapons that are part of me. Two of them, in fact."

And this is where Max holds up his fists.

Oh, yes. He is totally going there.

"I am a martial arts master. I'm even teaching two girls self-defense!" Or trying to, anyway. Max can't deny that it would be totally awesome to learn how to use a real sword, though.

He smiles up at Tomei. "But... I guess it couldn't hurt to learn something new."

[marchforthedead]

Tomei ducks his head again, very much the six-foot-squillion kid who thinks he'll probably get in trouble for being amused. "Attack me now."

He schools his expression into seriousness and nods to Max. "I'll test you. See what you know."

He's not one of Minsheng's generals at his age for no reason. He doesn't stand any differently, looks entirely relaxed, but he's ready.

[bythatmuch]

"Wh- now? Right here?"

Max studies Tomei for a second, possibly admiring that adorable smile - or possibly just sizing him up the way Max sizes up any enemy, which is more likely, we swear - then stands.

"Okay. I hope you're ready for this!"

Here comes the leg sweep!

[marchforthedead]

He steps into the attack, stooping low and wrapping his arms around Max's thighs to sweep the man's legs from under him.

He could do it at speed, if he wanted--but that would hurt. He catches Max's shoulder before the man quite has a chance to hit the ground and drops him gently onto the carpet instead.

"I'm bigger than you," he notes. "You can't attack me that way. Not so straight, direct--is that what you know? Not so good for a small man." He scratches behind his ear, mouth quirked to one side in an expression that suggests he disapproves and knows he doesn't have the right to. "It can be, you know, it can work, but..."

BASICALLY, MAX, HE'S TRYING TO FIGURE OUT A WAY TO SAY 'YOU'RE NOT VERY GOOD AT THIS' WITHOUT SAYING IT.