[Locked] And the questions pour out... (I did not understand)
In the Kashtta Tower, there's a locked weapons cabinet.
Suzie Costello never did have a problem with locks.
It only takes a minute to get it open, and then she's pulling out a pistol that looks servicable enough. It's kept loaded and ready. All the better -- she doesn't have much time. But then, what she's planning will only take a minute, anyway.
Thane's gone, yes. No thanks to her. Jack's gone as well, and for all that he was the one that helped her trick Thane into rebuilding instead of just destroying, most of her's still in rubble. Most of her's still in an empty strip mall, with her life in pieces.
The trouble with having a new foundation, she thinks, is no one thought to show her what to build on it. The old structures no longer apply, and she's got no idea how to make something new.
This is what she is, what she'll always be: the traitor, the woman who gave herself to someone she hated, and not for the selfless reasons she'd convinced herself of before she left. The woman who lost everything, and who failed at redemption.
She wanted him to destoy her, wanted to see if she'd survive it, just wanted him for more reasons than she has words for. And she got what she wanted.
But I survived. There's a joke. How can you survive something you still haven't left?
Even the idea of Suzie Costello is a fragile, shaky thing. Suzie Costello's been closed off for almost as long as she can remember, and this person in her skin is painfully open, vulnerable in ways she can only make the barest attempt at hiding.
But it doesn't matter. She remembers being shot. Now he can't hurt me anymore. And there was certainty, and for a moment there was even something approaching peace, before survival instinct kicked in, before Owen, before... everything.
She hasn't left that room with Thane. She hasn't found a way to be anything other than his. And that particular situation's intolerable. If it's a choice between continuing on as the thing he made her, and nothingness, that's a choice she's already made.
She'd apologise to Jack, but Jack's gone. She's said her goodbyes to Malek, and if he didn't understand, he will.
She brings the barrel of the gun under her chin, and... She remembers. For a moment, she hesitates. For a moment, she chokes on a sob.
But there's no Ressurection Gauntlet now, no miracle to bring her back, just one bullet and the darkness. (Again.)
She's crying.
She's smiling.
Because I could not stop for death...
She's squeezing the trigger.
WARNING: This thread contains content which may be disturbing and/or triggering. Proceed at your own risk.
Suzie Costello never did have a problem with locks.
It only takes a minute to get it open, and then she's pulling out a pistol that looks servicable enough. It's kept loaded and ready. All the better -- she doesn't have much time. But then, what she's planning will only take a minute, anyway.
Thane's gone, yes. No thanks to her. Jack's gone as well, and for all that he was the one that helped her trick Thane into rebuilding instead of just destroying, most of her's still in rubble. Most of her's still in an empty strip mall, with her life in pieces.
The trouble with having a new foundation, she thinks, is no one thought to show her what to build on it. The old structures no longer apply, and she's got no idea how to make something new.
This is what she is, what she'll always be: the traitor, the woman who gave herself to someone she hated, and not for the selfless reasons she'd convinced herself of before she left. The woman who lost everything, and who failed at redemption.
She wanted him to destoy her, wanted to see if she'd survive it, just wanted him for more reasons than she has words for. And she got what she wanted.
But I survived. There's a joke. How can you survive something you still haven't left?
Even the idea of Suzie Costello is a fragile, shaky thing. Suzie Costello's been closed off for almost as long as she can remember, and this person in her skin is painfully open, vulnerable in ways she can only make the barest attempt at hiding.
But it doesn't matter. She remembers being shot. Now he can't hurt me anymore. And there was certainty, and for a moment there was even something approaching peace, before survival instinct kicked in, before Owen, before... everything.
She hasn't left that room with Thane. She hasn't found a way to be anything other than his. And that particular situation's intolerable. If it's a choice between continuing on as the thing he made her, and nothingness, that's a choice she's already made.
She'd apologise to Jack, but Jack's gone. She's said her goodbyes to Malek, and if he didn't understand, he will.
She brings the barrel of the gun under her chin, and... She remembers. For a moment, she hesitates. For a moment, she chokes on a sob.
But there's no Ressurection Gauntlet now, no miracle to bring her back, just one bullet and the darkness. (Again.)
She's crying.
She's smiling.
Because I could not stop for death...
She's squeezing the trigger.
WARNING: This thread contains content which may be disturbing and/or triggering. Proceed at your own risk.