love...
it is a funny thing, love is. it always seems so wonderful and easy to fall into it and yet so meaningful and relevant. You think it will last forever, or at least you hope so, and you live in this kind of splendid bliss for as long as you can stand it.
it is a funny thing, hurting is. is always seems so horrible yet easy for one to hurt you and yet you stick by them because you love them and think it is just a phase and that everything will be better when it passes. We all have our bad days and our rough spots. i mean one must at least expect a few bumps in the road, and one can even learn to tolerate them, even the bigger ones that last for over 3 months.
it is a funny thing, leaving is. i dont want to and it is hard as hell because i am in love, but in the end i am just hurting myself by staying with you. by being nice and pretending that i didnt suffer all those times you said you'd call and you didn't. by pretending that all those things you didnt do was excuseable. by allowing you to trample all over me and still be willing to call you with a splendid answering machine message prepared for all of those millions of times you didnt call. and for pretending i wasnt cold or sad with all of those wet footsteps home when you didnt come after me. it is hard to leave those you love, but i suppose you must once you finally let it hit you that they dont love you back.
i suppose the hurting and the loving is all my fault. the leaving is the one thing that ought to have been yours but you didnt even have the balls to do that when you realized you didnt love me. instead you string me along, maybe because you fear being lonely or i seem to have something all figured out that you dont. i dont know. but to tell the truth, i dont have it all figured out and i dont know all the answers, or even a lot of them, truth be told, but i do know that is not nice to be held onto as a stuffed bear so that you dont feel lonely and afraid as you brave the dark or whatever it is that seems to have you quivering in your under roos.
this is me telling you that i cannot stand it anymore. it was good that you slipped up tonight and told me it was all a farce. i will be sure to return your things to you as soon as i can. and oh, i will make sure to tell you the secret that you so desperately desire.
but for now i am tired, and unlike you, the cold, stony heart of man. i cannot let things go and i cannot just push them out of my thoughts and say goodnight. so instead i will attempt to sleep in hopes that i dont cause you distress by informing you that you deprived me of it. but if you ever really want to know the answer to that question (when did you hurt me?) just ask it again and i will be sure to send over the answer as soon as my hands can produce it.
ps i still love you for whatever that is worth, and due to all of your ridiculous eyelash wishes that seem to have come true, at least in my eyes, it seems i will be stuck in such a state forever.
good luck with the job hunt, hope the transfer pans out.
sincerely.
the girl who is tired of it all.
it is a funny thing, hurting is. is always seems so horrible yet easy for one to hurt you and yet you stick by them because you love them and think it is just a phase and that everything will be better when it passes. We all have our bad days and our rough spots. i mean one must at least expect a few bumps in the road, and one can even learn to tolerate them, even the bigger ones that last for over 3 months.
it is a funny thing, leaving is. i dont want to and it is hard as hell because i am in love, but in the end i am just hurting myself by staying with you. by being nice and pretending that i didnt suffer all those times you said you'd call and you didn't. by pretending that all those things you didnt do was excuseable. by allowing you to trample all over me and still be willing to call you with a splendid answering machine message prepared for all of those millions of times you didnt call. and for pretending i wasnt cold or sad with all of those wet footsteps home when you didnt come after me. it is hard to leave those you love, but i suppose you must once you finally let it hit you that they dont love you back.
i suppose the hurting and the loving is all my fault. the leaving is the one thing that ought to have been yours but you didnt even have the balls to do that when you realized you didnt love me. instead you string me along, maybe because you fear being lonely or i seem to have something all figured out that you dont. i dont know. but to tell the truth, i dont have it all figured out and i dont know all the answers, or even a lot of them, truth be told, but i do know that is not nice to be held onto as a stuffed bear so that you dont feel lonely and afraid as you brave the dark or whatever it is that seems to have you quivering in your under roos.
this is me telling you that i cannot stand it anymore. it was good that you slipped up tonight and told me it was all a farce. i will be sure to return your things to you as soon as i can. and oh, i will make sure to tell you the secret that you so desperately desire.
but for now i am tired, and unlike you, the cold, stony heart of man. i cannot let things go and i cannot just push them out of my thoughts and say goodnight. so instead i will attempt to sleep in hopes that i dont cause you distress by informing you that you deprived me of it. but if you ever really want to know the answer to that question (when did you hurt me?) just ask it again and i will be sure to send over the answer as soon as my hands can produce it.
ps i still love you for whatever that is worth, and due to all of your ridiculous eyelash wishes that seem to have come true, at least in my eyes, it seems i will be stuck in such a state forever.
good luck with the job hunt, hope the transfer pans out.
sincerely.
the girl who is tired of it all.