I know that you disabled comments on your latest post and probably for a good reason. but im going to be a bastard and post a comment to that post in this post. because I need to thank you. thank you for putting into words something that i have been needing to articulate for myself.
most especially the last bit...
"Depression is pain, drowning, pressure... but most of all it is nothing. The understanding that this is all nothing. That I do nothing, and that I care for nothing. That nothing matters, that I do nothing for all those who care for me. it is the understanding that this post means nothing. It's not a cry for help or attention. That my feelings mean nothing. They are feelings. Their existance should have no affect on my actions.
My efforts are for nothing. I try to act OK, but that just makes it worse.
My lies are nothing.
There is nothing left of me."
hell...in all reality i could copy and paste the whole darn thing right into my own journal because every word rings true.
so once again, thank you for your words. they are much better than mine. and thank you for letting me know that im not the only one who feels exactly this way. its comforting even though it means that someone else has to go through this too.
but im going to be a bastard and post a comment to that post in this post.
because I need to thank you.
thank you for putting into words something that i have been needing to articulate for myself.
most especially the last bit...
"Depression is pain, drowning, pressure... but most of all it is nothing. The understanding that this is all nothing. That I do nothing, and that I care for nothing. That nothing matters, that I do nothing for all those who care for me. it is the understanding that this post means nothing. It's not a cry for help or attention. That my feelings mean nothing. They are feelings. Their existance should have no affect on my actions.
My efforts are for nothing. I try to act OK, but that just makes it worse.
My lies are nothing.
There is nothing left of me."
hell...in all reality i could copy and paste the whole darn thing right into my own journal because every word rings true.
so once again, thank you for your words. they are much better than mine.
and thank you for letting me know that im not the only one who feels exactly this way. its comforting even though it means that someone else has to go through this too.
*hugs*
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