LJ Idol Exhibit B: It's A Table for Two Kinda World, Baby.
This sucks.
"What sucks?"
Fine, allow me to elucidate. It sucks that we are talking about finding stupid partners again!
"Wait... what? That's not very nice."
Depends on what you think I meant. I mean, I'm talking specifically about the fact that I was supposed to find a partner and pair up and write an LJ Idol entry and had all of one morning to do so before I literally went camping out to a place with no internet, no phone and no way of dealing with this particular challenge.
"Oh. Bitter much?"
Fine by you, of course, with your internet access all weekend. I mean, I could have written something and posted it just fine on my own! But no, I had to find a partner. In the middle of no where. YOU were probably sitting all lush and cool, with your internet, and your partner, and your super cool topics that mesh perfectly.
"Geez! Calm down! It's just a game!"
Again, easy for you to say. You weren't sitting in a tent while it rained, alone, partnerless...
I mean, LJ Idol-wise of course. I'm not talking about the fact that it seems like Noah's Ark around here with everyone being all paired off and shit and some of us just... being alone.
Single.
Doomed to die by ourselves and not give our mother's grandchildren.
"...I think you're a little confused... This is a writing competition thing, right?"
I'm NOT confused! Just because I don't have a partner doesn't somehow make me LESS THAN. Screw you, partnered folks! I don't have to spend money to buy Valentine's Day presents.
"...come again?"
... don't suppose you'll agree to pretend I didn't just say that, will ya? No? FINE, THEN I'LL SAY IT. SOMETIMES IT SUCKS TO BE PARTNERLESS! Happy now? Jerks.
"Hey. I didn't mean it like that..."
You did too. Now I'm going to cry into my keyboard and probably short it out and probably die of electrocution... ALONE. BECAUSE NO ONE IS MY PARTNER. ARE YOU HAPPY THAT YOU KEEP POINTING THAT OUT?!
"I didn't mean that. I'm sure..."
What? That I have a lovely personality? You know that's code for ugly, right?
"I didn't say that."
WHAT'S WRONG WITH MY PERSONALITY?
"Calm down!"
What? For a partnered person, you sure are dumb. Don't you know that calm down is like saying be a completely crazy irrational bitch?!
"Look. I don't appreciate being called 'partnered person.'"
Don't mock me. Jerk. Don't mock me with your partnered status by pretending it's not a big deal. I'm just me, all alone...
"You may be just one person... but I'm increasingly skeptical that there is only one of you in there..."
Jerk.
"What's with the name calling?"
Oh. Sorry. Jerk.
"Well then. I think we can all see why you don't have a partner."
WHAT IS THAT SUPPOSED TO MEAN?!
"Oh, I think you know."
...
"Yep. You know."
This entry was written for LJ Idol: Exhibit B Topic 3. I choose to write about "Oh, Lord, we're not talking ______ again, are we?." All the entries can be viewed at therealljidol. I encourage everyone to check out the game for some really incredible writing.
Obviously, we are supposed to be partnered for this week, but alas... It was not meant to be. So, me and my neurosis wrote this for the amusement of any who have been single in a Table for Two Kinda World.
"What sucks?"
Fine, allow me to elucidate. It sucks that we are talking about finding stupid partners again!
"Wait... what? That's not very nice."
Depends on what you think I meant. I mean, I'm talking specifically about the fact that I was supposed to find a partner and pair up and write an LJ Idol entry and had all of one morning to do so before I literally went camping out to a place with no internet, no phone and no way of dealing with this particular challenge.
"Oh. Bitter much?"
Fine by you, of course, with your internet access all weekend. I mean, I could have written something and posted it just fine on my own! But no, I had to find a partner. In the middle of no where. YOU were probably sitting all lush and cool, with your internet, and your partner, and your super cool topics that mesh perfectly.
"Geez! Calm down! It's just a game!"
Again, easy for you to say. You weren't sitting in a tent while it rained, alone, partnerless...
I mean, LJ Idol-wise of course. I'm not talking about the fact that it seems like Noah's Ark around here with everyone being all paired off and shit and some of us just... being alone.
Single.
Doomed to die by ourselves and not give our mother's grandchildren.
"...I think you're a little confused... This is a writing competition thing, right?"
I'm NOT confused! Just because I don't have a partner doesn't somehow make me LESS THAN. Screw you, partnered folks! I don't have to spend money to buy Valentine's Day presents.
"...come again?"
... don't suppose you'll agree to pretend I didn't just say that, will ya? No? FINE, THEN I'LL SAY IT. SOMETIMES IT SUCKS TO BE PARTNERLESS! Happy now? Jerks.
"Hey. I didn't mean it like that..."
You did too. Now I'm going to cry into my keyboard and probably short it out and probably die of electrocution... ALONE. BECAUSE NO ONE IS MY PARTNER. ARE YOU HAPPY THAT YOU KEEP POINTING THAT OUT?!
"I didn't mean that. I'm sure..."
What? That I have a lovely personality? You know that's code for ugly, right?
"I didn't say that."
WHAT'S WRONG WITH MY PERSONALITY?
"Calm down!"
What? For a partnered person, you sure are dumb. Don't you know that calm down is like saying be a completely crazy irrational bitch?!
"Look. I don't appreciate being called 'partnered person.'"
Don't mock me. Jerk. Don't mock me with your partnered status by pretending it's not a big deal. I'm just me, all alone...
"You may be just one person... but I'm increasingly skeptical that there is only one of you in there..."
Jerk.
"What's with the name calling?"
Oh. Sorry. Jerk.
"Well then. I think we can all see why you don't have a partner."
WHAT IS THAT SUPPOSED TO MEAN?!
"Oh, I think you know."
...
"Yep. You know."
This entry was written for LJ Idol: Exhibit B Topic 3. I choose to write about "Oh, Lord, we're not talking ______ again, are we?." All the entries can be viewed at therealljidol. I encourage everyone to check out the game for some really incredible writing.
Obviously, we are supposed to be partnered for this week, but alas... It was not meant to be. So, me and my neurosis wrote this for the amusement of any who have been single in a Table for Two Kinda World.