All is fair
Well this weekend offically sucked, no good parties, nothing fun to do...
On friday i went to Applebee's with Mariel, Clay and Lauren, and well who do I see after awhile..Sushi, with two sophmore girls that use to go to my school. At first yes, I was insulted. I mean he just stoped talking to me out of no where and where/who do I find him with...two trappy ass girls YOUNGER than me by far...lol i'm gonna go slash his tires
Mariel and I went to go see a play at AWC last night. It was called "Tales of the lost formicans" Its a dark comedy about aliens acting out and describing human life. It was quiet funny, and pretty good. I might want to go see more plays over there
Then we went to the bowling alley and met up with Clay. We bowled a couple of times and were having fun, somewhat. Clay and I were having fun, but Mariel was kinda distant. She still is bummed about her Ex, and was talking with Lauren on her phone outside. I got talking to Clay and he was a really nice guys. Funny, smart, and i dunno...a kinda of a attraction of formed I guess. I'm not sure if it was mutual, but i guess i'll never know. Pete and Mariel have wanted us to hook-up but i dunno it just never came up. Mariel even went so far as to say she is "gonna let me have him". WHAT THE FUCK? honestly i tried to not let is cross my mind (cause i didnt want my hopes too high, and I wasn't too sure what I thought of him)Anyways, mariel said that Lauren was going on about how competative is it between us when it comes to guys. Lets say...If there was one guy in the room, we would all fight for his attention, which honestly is true. This comes from what happened with Mike last weekend, and I know how she feels. Lauren isn't one to go around and make out with guys, so what happened with Mike was something a bit different. Something she doesn't know how to deal with like we do, cause we are use to the rejection. I mean Lauren is right, we are very competative, especially Mariel and I... She takes a more an agressive approach, while...well I dont. Not that I dont want to, I just dont like being pushy. Anyways later that night I would see how that would work.
Clay, Mariel and I went to Mariel's house and just chilled there. We were all talking and falling asleep. I fell asleep and woke up to the sounds of Mariel making out with Clay...surprize, fucking surprize. It kinda irked me so I just left the room and slept on the couch. It kinda hurt cause I sorta liked him, at least I think I did. Well when he left Mariel came back and told me to go to bed. I did and didnt say anything about. I woke up with morning at just left her house, I didnt feel like being there for much longer.
Side note: Yes my usual ranting bout something that is only interesting to me is about to begin. I still hate guys, most of them at least. The ones I like..well dont like me or end up making out with Mariel (I dont know which is worse). Then the ones that like me, i just have no interest what so ever...cause to be honest...my standards are too night for my own damn good. I'm so pissed off that only the ugly guys come my way and give me the time of day. If this is a joke God, its not funny anymore, this is just sad. The only person that fits those standards is well, Dustin. I miss him so much. I had this perfect, great guy and now i'm not gonna be with him again. It sucks and hurts all over again. I care about him more than I have with a lot of other people, in a long time. I just wish there was a chance of us at least talking again. He made me so happy, but i was always worried about me not being good enough for me. I mean if you look at him, and look at me, you'll see i'm nothing special. And that one single moment where this tall, blue eyes, blonde hair, pretty girls walks by, I may as well not exists, cause he'd leave me. History intends to repeat itself...always
On friday i went to Applebee's with Mariel, Clay and Lauren, and well who do I see after awhile..Sushi, with two sophmore girls that use to go to my school. At first yes, I was insulted. I mean he just stoped talking to me out of no where and where/who do I find him with...two trappy ass girls YOUNGER than me by far...lol i'm gonna go slash his tires
Mariel and I went to go see a play at AWC last night. It was called "Tales of the lost formicans" Its a dark comedy about aliens acting out and describing human life. It was quiet funny, and pretty good. I might want to go see more plays over there
Then we went to the bowling alley and met up with Clay. We bowled a couple of times and were having fun, somewhat. Clay and I were having fun, but Mariel was kinda distant. She still is bummed about her Ex, and was talking with Lauren on her phone outside. I got talking to Clay and he was a really nice guys. Funny, smart, and i dunno...a kinda of a attraction of formed I guess. I'm not sure if it was mutual, but i guess i'll never know. Pete and Mariel have wanted us to hook-up but i dunno it just never came up. Mariel even went so far as to say she is "gonna let me have him". WHAT THE FUCK? honestly i tried to not let is cross my mind (cause i didnt want my hopes too high, and I wasn't too sure what I thought of him)Anyways, mariel said that Lauren was going on about how competative is it between us when it comes to guys. Lets say...If there was one guy in the room, we would all fight for his attention, which honestly is true. This comes from what happened with Mike last weekend, and I know how she feels. Lauren isn't one to go around and make out with guys, so what happened with Mike was something a bit different. Something she doesn't know how to deal with like we do, cause we are use to the rejection. I mean Lauren is right, we are very competative, especially Mariel and I... She takes a more an agressive approach, while...well I dont. Not that I dont want to, I just dont like being pushy. Anyways later that night I would see how that would work.
Clay, Mariel and I went to Mariel's house and just chilled there. We were all talking and falling asleep. I fell asleep and woke up to the sounds of Mariel making out with Clay...surprize, fucking surprize. It kinda irked me so I just left the room and slept on the couch. It kinda hurt cause I sorta liked him, at least I think I did. Well when he left Mariel came back and told me to go to bed. I did and didnt say anything about. I woke up with morning at just left her house, I didnt feel like being there for much longer.
Side note: Yes my usual ranting bout something that is only interesting to me is about to begin. I still hate guys, most of them at least. The ones I like..well dont like me or end up making out with Mariel (I dont know which is worse). Then the ones that like me, i just have no interest what so ever...cause to be honest...my standards are too night for my own damn good. I'm so pissed off that only the ugly guys come my way and give me the time of day. If this is a joke God, its not funny anymore, this is just sad. The only person that fits those standards is well, Dustin. I miss him so much. I had this perfect, great guy and now i'm not gonna be with him again. It sucks and hurts all over again. I care about him more than I have with a lot of other people, in a long time. I just wish there was a chance of us at least talking again. He made me so happy, but i was always worried about me not being good enough for me. I mean if you look at him, and look at me, you'll see i'm nothing special. And that one single moment where this tall, blue eyes, blonde hair, pretty girls walks by, I may as well not exists, cause he'd leave me. History intends to repeat itself...always