(no subject)
So, the past few days I have been in Baton Rouge with Corey. Sunday my parents brought me up there since yours truely is without transportation for the next few days. That night we just hung out and I really don't remember much else.
Monday I hung out around his house all damn day and watched Ocean's Eleven and slept hah. Corey got home and we went go eat at some Mexican or burrito place with his family for his little cousins birthday. He has an adorable family. His little sister is the cutest baby I have ever seen. Almost makes me think about possibly having kids waayy later on.. almost. We hung out at his place a little bit after then went see that new Jim Scarey movie. I disliked it greatly. Wasn't as funny as it was made out to be. Quite sad, actually. We came back around 12 or something and watched The Terminal but Corey kept falling asleep and SNORING hahah. We didn't finish it though because he didn't like it. Loser. Went to bed.
Today I woke up early as heck with him before he went to work. It was wonderful =). Washed his bed stuff and made his bed and put the care bear under the covers *I took pictures hahah*. Got done with that and watched the rest of The Terminal and ended up falling asleep longer than I thought.. till 4. Hung out and got online till Corey got home. Watched him play Counter Strike FOREVER. Got a few phone calls that made me upset and cry. heh. Corey was sweet though and made me smile again. =) I felt horrible for letting him see me crying but I really needed to cry, more than I have ever needed something really before. He brought me home around 10 and it was a nice ride home. We talked about so many things. It was really nice. Even though he was an a-hole and tried to scare the shit outta me. I also hung out with Jon tonight for a while and I have to say he gives the most amazing back massages EVEr. Twas nice.
I really don't care if people judge me or anything, I want to get this out so I am. While I was having a great time in Baton Rouge, my family was falling apart for the final time. My dad has moved out completely and to Lake Charles to live with another woman. My mom is moving back to Canada after Christmas so guess who is left here by her lonesome? Me. Like always. I'll be in Houston soon enough though and then coming back for July but probally just going straight to Baton Rouge. I probally won't come back to Lafayette. I love every person here but I really need to get this part of my life over and done with. All being here has done is cause me pain and put a stress on me and my life that I have never had. Everyone is more than welcome to come visit James and I in Houston and once I get settled inot a place in B.R. EVERYONE is comin' party with me. It was a feeling I have never felt before when I walked through the back door tonight and realized I was alone. The house was torn apart from the fighting, Remy was beaten, and my home wasn't a home anymore. It was empty and cold. I walked in, put my bags down and sat on the bathroom floor with my dogs and just cried. I have never felt this alone and torn before. I say I donot care about my father and what not but in all honesty, I do more now than I ever did before. It's weird not hearing his snoring tonight, not smelling his cigerrets smoke in the morning or hearing the dogs jump around when he wakes up. It's very lonely in this house tonight. My mom is at my aunts house tonight and I miss her more than I ever have. I want to hug her and tell her I love her and tell her she will be okay and she needs to stay strong. She means everything to me and more. My brother's are all moving on without even really noticing what is happening to our family. Okay enough rambling. I'll probally be mentioning this a lot in the entries to come.
Now, I am going attempt to sleep since I have a pretty big day tomorrow. Work, psy., Park, Art Muesum. All I can think about right now is how lonely my Christmas is going to be this year, but how awesome New Year's Eve is going to be. Since Corney is coming. =)