gay in the media, slash, and why trek fandom makes me wibble.

[betweenthebliss]

i'm quoting someone on my Dth reading page here, who said "some day i will write a post that's not about star trek, but it is not this day"-- really it's more like, some day i will not spend half my work day thinking about star trek, but it is not this day

Comments

[anonymous]

that maybe some day we'll have books, movies, tv shows and comics where "omfg, i'm gay!" isn't the issue that takes over the entire story.

I hope this day is far, far away. There need to be more stories aknowledging this, not less.

I know this gets into the way of the squee often, much like other real life issues do (for example racism), but I think it's actually important that it is aknowledged. That it isn't a lot in slash seems to be one of the biggest problems in slash. I know that many heterosexual people like to blend out how our society works, especially taking priviledge into account.

But that doesn't mean it should be done, or is better if it is. Silencing issues just isn't the way to go, and it doesn't make a story better.

[betweenthebliss]

i'm not talking about silencing the issues-- of course coming out stories are important, they're extremely important *especially* for people who struggle with their sexuality. what i mean is that, in my opinion at least, it's equally important to have stories that show that there's more to the life of a gay person than just the realization/coming out phase. that-- and again, in my opinion-- the only way being gay will stop being seen as something weird is if there are more visible, sympathetic characters who appear in stories and situations that make them accessible to people who aren't gay-- if books, movies, and other media show gay characters in roles and situations that make it easier for non-gay readers/viewers to sympathize with them and relate to them. because if the stories are always about the realization/coming out phase, it can be hard for someone who's never gone through that to relate, you know?

[azurelunatic]

I think it's equally important to gay/etc people to have characters who are dealing with phases of their life past the coming-out phase. There is more to being gay/bisexual than struggling with one's own identity and coming out; there's staying out, there's dealing with people who are going to be a creep about it, there's dealing with what happens when one's religion and one don't agree on the issue, there are the little awkwardnesses of daily life in a heteronormative world.

I think that yes, some of the stories need to be about existing in a heteronormative world, in all phases, from pre-awareness through realization and coming out to living out and sometimes even going back in. I think it's doing the community a grave disservice to say that all the stories about us must be about that. I want to see it acknowledged, and I want to see the actual plot and theme of the story be about something else.

[betweenthebliss]

YES. yes yes yes, this.

[azurelunatic]

I define myself as a writer, if I have to pick one thing. I label myself as queer/bisexual. No matter how much work I do in my daily life in the cause of LBGTQ activism, I do not wish to become limited by the rights I don't yet have.

[betweenthebliss]

YES, OMG *clings* so correct. i quote my best friend often, she says that she doesn't want to have to tell people she's gay the way straight people don't have to tell people they're straight. that is not all my life is about, and it shouldn't be all that stories about gay people are about either!

[persephasa]

Can't we distinguish between an author thinking, "okay, gay is a problem now but how would it be seen in this universe" and an author thinking, "GAY SEX GAY SEX GAY SEX SQUEE" and not caring about anything else

[lady_ganesh]

Thank you, yes. And I also think it's important to realize that different characters are at different points in their lives-- teenage boys (like in my icon) can and should have different stories than the young professionals in Star Trek or the older adults in, say, Stargate.

[betweenthebliss]

yeaaaaaaahhhh that's really important, i think especially in terms of visibility and education (in the sense of exposure, not schooling) -- the coming out stories are important at any age, but especially for teens, to teach them that it's okay to question their sexuality, not to be afraid of being gay -- and yeah, that can happen to a person at any age (i had gay friends throughout middle & high school but i didn't have my own realization/coming out til college) but for someone who has been living as a gay/bi/trans/pansexual person for months or years, it's important to show that the rest of your life isn't consumed by the fact that you're gay-- that other stuff happens, sometimes really cool stuff and sometimes really hard stuff, but there's stuff, and most of it has nothing to do with who you're attracted to or who you love.

[lady_ganesh]

Yeah, exactly. And that doesn't mean there's not a place for 'older' coming out/coming to terms with sexuality stories-- it happens! But I don't think it can or should be the only story we tell with gay/bi/trans/pansexual characters.

[betweenthebliss]

exactly, on both counts. \o/

[betweenthebliss]

i so SO hear you re: the definition thing. i still haven't found a word i really like to describe my sexuality, and the one i'm most comfortable with (pansexual) isn't one i can really throw around in conversation, because half the time people ask you what it means, which is kind of counterproductive to the idea of not making an issue or a big deal about not being straight, lol. which also is why i like the intergalactic equal opportunity slut idea, 'cause it's just nice to think that eventually we won't need to have this struggle over terminology.