You're still all gay
Dave and I stumbled into some place that has computer access so I figured I'd show up and let you all know how I'm doing. Much to my demise, they sell Ice House 40's and cases of steel reserve down here. So, I decided to let Dave and his buddies in on the lovely world of "Getting steel retarded." We all had a good laugh at the title of what happens when you get wasted off steel reserve. So we get 5 cases, and head on down to the pool at 1pm. I have to sit in the shade since I'm so pale and dont tan, which is fine with me cause I look like a badass anyway. So I start to attract some attention by some of the local females (which are all seriously boner inducing hot). Such gay drabble came out their mouth as "Hey, let me see your tattoos" and "Hey, you're pale" Anyway, they were hot so I was fine with it.
So we decide after a few hours of heavy steel reserve drinking that we're going to go to some bar that has happy hour. Seems like a good idea right? Wrong. We get there and it's two for one specials. So naturally you double fist it and try to drink as much in that hour as possible because you tell yourself "I'm saving money if I do it this way."
I'm out on the patio talking to some dude like we've been best friends for the past ten years. That's when I start to realize I must be drunk and over my limit. I say "Jonny, lets slow it down, you dont even know this guy, I think you're drunk." But then I say "Fuck it, what do you care, you joined the man have fun." I'll let you guess which voice took precidence.
So out comes too generous with his money because he's drunk Jonny. He goes to the bar, sees a very attractive girl standing all alone. He says "Hey, can I buy you a drink?" she smiles and says "Yeah that'd be great, hold on" She comes back and introduces her five friends, who are all staring at Jonny with those "please buy us a drink we're ever so thirsty and you're ever so attractive and manly" big doe eyes at him. Jonny just smiles, flexes his muscles so hard he rips his own shirt off and says "Sure ladies, money is not an option." They order drinks he's never even heard of, and as if that wasnt enough, they order about three drinks a piece he's never even heard of. Jonny hands his magic drink producing card to the bartender and has him close out the tab. Jonny signs off on a 138 dollar bar tab that litterally was open for fifteen minutes. He would be angry, but he's so drunk he says "Fuck it, I'm leaving soon" Gets a few numbers, and then at 10PM he and Dave go back to his place.
That's how I remember that segment of my life. And after that it gets a bit blurry.
I go to Daves, smoke a camel, and then stand up. Bad idea, the world comes crashing down and I hit my head on something hard. I think to myself "Man, I better go in the bathroom incase I throw up" Long story short I puked in his bath tub, he eventually comes back, gets me to his bed, stuffs my face in an empty pitcher of beer says if I have to puke to puke in that then dissappears till the morning.
Georgia is fucking awesome. Have fun in the cold faggots.
So we decide after a few hours of heavy steel reserve drinking that we're going to go to some bar that has happy hour. Seems like a good idea right? Wrong. We get there and it's two for one specials. So naturally you double fist it and try to drink as much in that hour as possible because you tell yourself "I'm saving money if I do it this way."
I'm out on the patio talking to some dude like we've been best friends for the past ten years. That's when I start to realize I must be drunk and over my limit. I say "Jonny, lets slow it down, you dont even know this guy, I think you're drunk." But then I say "Fuck it, what do you care, you joined the man have fun." I'll let you guess which voice took precidence.
So out comes too generous with his money because he's drunk Jonny. He goes to the bar, sees a very attractive girl standing all alone. He says "Hey, can I buy you a drink?" she smiles and says "Yeah that'd be great, hold on" She comes back and introduces her five friends, who are all staring at Jonny with those "please buy us a drink we're ever so thirsty and you're ever so attractive and manly" big doe eyes at him. Jonny just smiles, flexes his muscles so hard he rips his own shirt off and says "Sure ladies, money is not an option." They order drinks he's never even heard of, and as if that wasnt enough, they order about three drinks a piece he's never even heard of. Jonny hands his magic drink producing card to the bartender and has him close out the tab. Jonny signs off on a 138 dollar bar tab that litterally was open for fifteen minutes. He would be angry, but he's so drunk he says "Fuck it, I'm leaving soon" Gets a few numbers, and then at 10PM he and Dave go back to his place.
That's how I remember that segment of my life. And after that it gets a bit blurry.
I go to Daves, smoke a camel, and then stand up. Bad idea, the world comes crashing down and I hit my head on something hard. I think to myself "Man, I better go in the bathroom incase I throw up" Long story short I puked in his bath tub, he eventually comes back, gets me to his bed, stuffs my face in an empty pitcher of beer says if I have to puke to puke in that then dissappears till the morning.
Georgia is fucking awesome. Have fun in the cold faggots.