x-posted from diaryland.
i am jealous that you can write so candidly.
to be candid, it terrifies me.
these things also terrify me (since we're putting it all out there)
being alone.
the dark. i can't seem to ever get over this. i've tried.
aliens/extraterrestrials, thinking about it for even a few minutes may result in at least one sleepless night.
hurting you (collective everyone i care about you)
being hurt
yelling
loud noises
squirrels and most other rodents
birds
not being good enough
responsibility
exposing myself
hard work
being nothing
it seems i'm on a roll. this is me. spilling my guts.
i confess
i don't know how to deal with stress.
it freaks me out, often causing complete meltdown.
it happens all the time. more often than you know.
sometimes life amazes me so much it's overwhelming, and i have to pause for a minute and catch my breath.
i am just as weird and stupid as every girl.
i hate that. i want to badly to say, i am above the insecurities and idiosyncracies. i'm not.
i am mean. i get mad when people chew gum too loudly, wear pajamas in public, when strangers smile at me, when stupid boys who post pictures of themselves on myspace with their shirts off send me messages saying, "what up gurl?!",when i am told i'm wrong, when i can't make myself understood (of course it's never my problem, it's because you're stupid), when i am told what to do, when i have to wait, when people hurt people, when people waste what they have, when someone is too blind to see what they're missing.
i am really nice. sometimes too nice. i've been called a pushover and that used to be true.
i just want you to like me. i am too sensitive for my own good. the following have been known to make me cry: photographs, paintings, heartbreakingly beautiful music, genius, loud noises, happiness, thinking about what i could have done differently...what i should have done...what i did'nt do...what i did...
i feel too much. it drains me.
watching a good film is more exhausting to me than running a marathon.
i long to be someone. do something. motivate people.
that's me, in a nutshell. how embarassing.
ask me anything, we're pulling out all the stops tonight.
i find a certain degree of comfort in the impersonal nature of the internet.
thank you al gore.
sometimes i like to say FUUUUCK!
dearest mother teresa i hope you read this.
to be candid, it terrifies me.
these things also terrify me (since we're putting it all out there)
being alone.
the dark. i can't seem to ever get over this. i've tried.
aliens/extraterrestrials, thinking about it for even a few minutes may result in at least one sleepless night.
hurting you (collective everyone i care about you)
being hurt
yelling
loud noises
squirrels and most other rodents
birds
not being good enough
responsibility
exposing myself
hard work
being nothing
it seems i'm on a roll. this is me. spilling my guts.
i confess
i don't know how to deal with stress.
it freaks me out, often causing complete meltdown.
it happens all the time. more often than you know.
sometimes life amazes me so much it's overwhelming, and i have to pause for a minute and catch my breath.
i am just as weird and stupid as every girl.
i hate that. i want to badly to say, i am above the insecurities and idiosyncracies. i'm not.
i am mean. i get mad when people chew gum too loudly, wear pajamas in public, when strangers smile at me, when stupid boys who post pictures of themselves on myspace with their shirts off send me messages saying, "what up gurl?!",when i am told i'm wrong, when i can't make myself understood (of course it's never my problem, it's because you're stupid), when i am told what to do, when i have to wait, when people hurt people, when people waste what they have, when someone is too blind to see what they're missing.
i am really nice. sometimes too nice. i've been called a pushover and that used to be true.
i just want you to like me. i am too sensitive for my own good. the following have been known to make me cry: photographs, paintings, heartbreakingly beautiful music, genius, loud noises, happiness, thinking about what i could have done differently...what i should have done...what i did'nt do...what i did...
i feel too much. it drains me.
watching a good film is more exhausting to me than running a marathon.
i long to be someone. do something. motivate people.
that's me, in a nutshell. how embarassing.
ask me anything, we're pulling out all the stops tonight.
i find a certain degree of comfort in the impersonal nature of the internet.
thank you al gore.
sometimes i like to say FUUUUCK!
dearest mother teresa i hope you read this.