No Catchy Shit
So this thing is dead in the water
What it meant to me was hope, what it meant to me was opinion, it meant a voice that wasnt against me. I used to read and write these things thinking i could make difference, thinking someone might read this and feel less alone, or might feel the same way i do... I have lost friends, i have been given nothing but nothing from this thing..... im quite certain this is accountable for my worst regrets. It is not satisfying anymore to write to no one.... it doesnt heal me..... it makes me more dark and less social.
Truth is i am damaged and writing, hanging out, talking, partying, drinking, empty words, time, listening to music and thinking will never heal this. its far from over, i feel as bad today as i always have.... now people dont question my distain, they simply ignore it. no one who reads this will ever ask me about it, guaranteed. it just aint like that anymore.
i dont want a job, i dont want a holiday, i dont want celebrations.... i would trade it all to find someone who simply loves me unconditionally for who i am.
and finally its out. the real truth.... i am alone and i am not getting any closer to feeling complete.
Goodbye.