(no subject)
well i still have a lot on my mind. im always worry about something, that has nothing to do with me. but i still think about it all the time. like i know i can help them some way or another. i dont know theres just a lot going on right now. i mean i try in picture me in there shoes, like they need to get high just like i do, and if they dont there pissed and irritated. anyone who actually reads like which i think is nobody, wont know what im talking about anyways. but i dont know. i wanna move so bad. i guess that i didnt change as much as i thought i did, cause im still running away from problems. i do my best with her thou, i try and make her feel quilty of herself, then she just blows it off. i try and talk about it, and she gets mad. i dont know until she stops running away then i will too. but until then theres nothing i can do for someone who doesnt want my help anymore. its pulling her in, and away from her family, and i guess im the only one who sees it i guess. im never happy where ever i am. i hate it so much. i just wanna find someone that i belong with, and just be happy with the person im with. im just blabbing about random shit of the top of my head. i think about leaving her and leaving her like this. cause eventually it will stop, with her quitting or death. and it just makes me weak thinking about it. makes me feel helpless around her, and then sometime i dont even wanna look at her. she thinks im stupid and i dont know its multiple times a day. and thats just fucking pathetic if you ask me. like what happened for you to stoop that low and then just bounce right back out of it. its fucking crazy and its driving me crazy. its like i dont have anyone to talk at all. i just wanna go back and have the amazing friendship that i used to have with my friends. talk and have fun, i havent had fun in a long time. besides that week up. i cant take this leaving and coming back all the time . i need to get a life, least start it.