for my piece of mind.remember:HES GONE
I quit Levis like a week ago er so.I'm a teacher now.wooh!!! It's a challenge tho.But I now have a full time job.
fer sum reason..a specific ASSHOLE kept trying to contact me. after almost a whole month of not talkin to him,he tried lookin for me. weird,cz he's not the type to do that at all.sucks how he just wouldnt forget me when it's the one thing i wanted him to do the most.He said he didn't want me outta his life..too late for that.too late for him.I thought it was funny when he said "atleast i made you happy"..what the fuck is he talkin bout.yea maybe the first 2 months.but dammn was it hell after that.imagine cryin every single second of EVERYSINGLE daaay.im not even exagerating.imagine yrself as a dog on a leash.yea thats right.my sister and michael could explain the same too.fuck, even mikes daaaad fer jezuz chrisst!.i was misserable and i put up with so much shit.and then now he says hes sorry...
sorry for callin me a drugaddict?a slut?for sayin how he wished he could feel like the luckies guy,but he couldnt?for braking up with me every second of every day?for pushing me?for hurting my arm and leaving a bruise?for knockin my head on the window?for always sayin i could never match up to his xgf?for sayin i was a fuckup?saying he wished i had an aura...for always kicking me outta his house and ruining the day?for never letting me go out..never talk to my friends...for not letting me move upstate er else he'd leave me (at 2months).for sayin i bing'ed and had a drug problem..for never wanting to listen to me (literally)..always hangin' up the phone :/ and neveeeeeeeeeeeeeeer answering it till he wanted,which was the next day.for always yelling at me till i cried and calling me ugly names,for getting a gun pulled at me,my sister,michael and felix,when it was all his fault?? sorry can't fix this.sorry doesn't fix a broken arm.sorry doesnt bring someone back to life..for a long time i had a low self esteem bcz of him...i regret the day i met him...in October of 2005...we met at the same place where the gun insident happened...i was never meant to hangout with those ppl,but i did that day and so on...i woulda never met that piece of shit.i woulda been fine alone.
he told me all these things when he's the one at home doing nothing cz he cant keep a job..he never even graduated nor got his GED..I'v done something with my life,im not relying on my parents to support me er shit.he does.i fuckin hate him so much.I think Justin use to think i wanted sumthing to do with him...I NEVER DID...i just wanted his bud haha.but i dont even smoke ne moreee.I've said it a thousand times,and I'll say it again..i never wanted anything sexual him,nor relationship wise.he had his chances and he fukd up.the best advise he ever gave me tho was:
HOPE FOR THE BEST,EXPECT THE WORST...
i always keep it in mind now..as it's tru.
fer sum reason..a specific ASSHOLE kept trying to contact me. after almost a whole month of not talkin to him,he tried lookin for me. weird,cz he's not the type to do that at all.sucks how he just wouldnt forget me when it's the one thing i wanted him to do the most.He said he didn't want me outta his life..too late for that.too late for him.I thought it was funny when he said "atleast i made you happy"..what the fuck is he talkin bout.yea maybe the first 2 months.but dammn was it hell after that.imagine cryin every single second of EVERYSINGLE daaay.im not even exagerating.imagine yrself as a dog on a leash.yea thats right.my sister and michael could explain the same too.fuck, even mikes daaaad fer jezuz chrisst!.i was misserable and i put up with so much shit.and then now he says hes sorry...
sorry for callin me a drugaddict?a slut?for sayin how he wished he could feel like the luckies guy,but he couldnt?for braking up with me every second of every day?for pushing me?for hurting my arm and leaving a bruise?for knockin my head on the window?for always sayin i could never match up to his xgf?for sayin i was a fuckup?saying he wished i had an aura...for always kicking me outta his house and ruining the day?for never letting me go out..never talk to my friends...for not letting me move upstate er else he'd leave me (at 2months).for sayin i bing'ed and had a drug problem..for never wanting to listen to me (literally)..always hangin' up the phone :/ and neveeeeeeeeeeeeeeer answering it till he wanted,which was the next day.for always yelling at me till i cried and calling me ugly names,for getting a gun pulled at me,my sister,michael and felix,when it was all his fault?? sorry can't fix this.sorry doesn't fix a broken arm.sorry doesnt bring someone back to life..for a long time i had a low self esteem bcz of him...i regret the day i met him...in October of 2005...we met at the same place where the gun insident happened...i was never meant to hangout with those ppl,but i did that day and so on...i woulda never met that piece of shit.i woulda been fine alone.
he told me all these things when he's the one at home doing nothing cz he cant keep a job..he never even graduated nor got his GED..I'v done something with my life,im not relying on my parents to support me er shit.he does.i fuckin hate him so much.I think Justin use to think i wanted sumthing to do with him...I NEVER DID...i just wanted his bud haha.but i dont even smoke ne moreee.I've said it a thousand times,and I'll say it again..i never wanted anything sexual him,nor relationship wise.he had his chances and he fukd up.the best advise he ever gave me tho was:
HOPE FOR THE BEST,EXPECT THE WORST...
i always keep it in mind now..as it's tru.