(no subject)
So... long time no write... been a busy girl. School itself is going great, the work is tough and there is alot of it but somehow I manage. Met a tonne of really cool new people that seem to be totally trustworthy which is nice cuz Im am sick of wasting time on those who arent. Missing home? Yes, sometimes but its getting alot easier thanks to some people. Some things are getting easier, some more difficult. I need to find a happy medium. Why did we have to reach this stupid comfort level? I hate it, I wish that time would just stay right where it is or that it would even go back a few months to when both of us were active participants. Sometimes I feel as though everything is dying and the cemetaries are all that is left. I dont want to live on only memories, I want what we had back. The pictures of how we used to be keep my dreams from turning into nightmares when I rest my head at night. I really want you back but Im not sure if i can have you. Show me that I can, because right now I sort of feel as though I never really did. I know my love will never fade but sometimes I worry that everything else will. God I hope not, I want to keep this forever. My heart is whole because of you, but right now I fear your starting to slowly remove the little peices again. Please just leave them right where they are... I want to keep them there... inside of me forever and I want to keep you here, beside me forever. I want to hold your hand. I want you to know that my heart is missing you because, although you are still here, you have distanced yourslef from the way it used to be. Please come back.