Nothing stays the same.
Trying to put these last few months into words has been an utter failure...
Here I am, struggling once more, to express with the right words who I have become because of you.
Because it has come to this:
if you disappear from my life, it would destroy me...
I guess I just love you too much.
...
It hurts daily... to be just friends when we were once so much more.
It hurts constantly... that I depend so much on you... that I can't function without you.
And it hurts to know you love me, but not but the way I want you to.
It hurts. Too much.
...
You are my companion, even if no longer as lovers. And thus, I cannot lose you.
I know you depend on me as well... you don't want to lose me either.
...
But I see it in your eyes... that things have to change.
No matter how much I deny it, I'm starting to feel it in my bones...
...and all I want to do is cry.
Here I am, struggling once more, to express with the right words who I have become because of you.
Because it has come to this:
if you disappear from my life, it would destroy me...
I guess I just love you too much.
...
It hurts daily... to be just friends when we were once so much more.
It hurts constantly... that I depend so much on you... that I can't function without you.
And it hurts to know you love me, but not but the way I want you to.
It hurts. Too much.
...
You are my companion, even if no longer as lovers. And thus, I cannot lose you.
I know you depend on me as well... you don't want to lose me either.
...
But I see it in your eyes... that things have to change.
No matter how much I deny it, I'm starting to feel it in my bones...
...and all I want to do is cry.