Berwald stripped naked, hanging his clothes on a tree branch and jumped right into the mountain water fed river. It was freezing cold. Just like he felt inside at the moment. He used sand from the bottom of the river to scrub his skin RAW. He wanted to just wash away all that pain, all the memories, all the part of his nature he hated
(
Read more... )
"It's not that I don't trust you with my heart Tino. You're the only reason I have one at all. I just don't trust myself. I can't risk the chance of losing control around you. I'd rather die than hurt you. ANY of you. You're the only family I have." Berwald added laying his forehead against Tino, deeply breathing in the crook of Tino's neck, shuddering with the weight of his fear.
"Please Tino. I can't hurt you. I can't." His voice caught with anguish.
"I don't know how to manage this darkness inside. I can only try to cage it. I don't know how to keep this wall from cracking. So that's why I walk away, just in case I fail." He added feeling torn apart inside. Shredded in soul.
Reply
Mads, however, put his hands on his hips and smiled before coming up and messing up Berwald's wet hair... well... at least messing it up more than it was. "You can stop feelin' bad about choking me. Obviously you didn't want it bad enough because the teachers were able to get you off me. I reckon that if you really wanted my blood bad enough no one would have been able to stop you. Naw, you just hated me. I promise you Svenk Trold, if you ever freak out and go after the rest of our family I'll kick your ass. I don't underestimate you anymore after that fight we were in." In a strange way, this was the best comfort the Dane could offer. "I'd never let you get out of hand. You might be a monster, but your our little monster." He grinned toothily, his lopsided leer. It was obvious that Mads had long ago forgiven the choking he'd received from the Swede. "Tino's safe with us." He winked.
Siguard just shook his head to get his hair out of his face in a nonchalant way. "We understand better, now, your unique situation Berwald. You're not a monster despite what Mads says."
"Yeah I'm an asshole, ignore me." The Dane rolled his eyes as he gathered up Tino's soaking wet clothes.
Siguard merely continued, "You have far more control than you assume, but know that you are an incredibly good person, and a strong one for the effort you successfully exert over that other side to your personality. To anyone else it would over power and dominate their personality. I owe you my life and my brother's life. I believe, in most situations, you're not a danger to anyone, especially not Tino."
"The precious." Danes wheezed, groveling around mimicking the sniveling Golem from Lord of the Rings before chuckling and standing back up to full height. "Don't you know Svenk Trold, trolls horde and savagely defend their treasures. Things that threaten them get their noses bloodied." He pointed at his own nose, which had fortunately not been broken in his altercation with the Swede. "If anything I'm more worried about you losing control and EATING Tino for fuck's sake, now also for fuck's sake, can you put some damn clothes on so we can go back to the great hall? Your cockasaurus is intimidating the wildlife and Tino's going to catch a cold."
Tino coughed. "Did you just call it a cockasaurus!?"
"Well it's not a cockadactyl. Anyway, do you feel in control yet Svenk or do you need more time alone? If so we'll take your wife to redress him." But said wife seemed reluctant to leave Berwald to the river again. He'd promised to understand if Berwald needed it, but in his heart he prayed that his love felt comforted for now, he was surrounded by the three people who loved him the most in the world. He hoped beyond hope that the danger had passed. But he said what he knew Berwald needed to hear. "If you need the time, rakas, you take as much as you need. If you need it, you need it. I'm going to try not to force you to socialize when you need focusing time... so long as you promise not to harm yourself while you do it. I'll try to be understanding, so long as you promise no more trying to rip your skin off or hurt yourself... alright? Is that a more reasonable request?" He desperately hoped it was.
Reply
"That I can promise Askling. I'm sorry I worry you, all of you. I don't say it enough, but I love you all, even you Rovhal." Berwald said wiping the back of his hand across his cheeks to get rid of old tears. Feeling his scruffy beard on his chin.
"I'm certainly going to look like a troll before this vacation is over... no razors here." He added rubbing his chin. His damn beard grew like a weed on steroids.
Reply
Siguard smiled. "Berwald, you get to tease Mathias for his Ginger-Beard." The Norwegian offered, making the Dane glower and Tino laugh. "You have a ginger beard!?"
"Shut up, my facial hair has red highlights." He grunted. Another reason why he shaved every morning. He hated the ginger beard... he even hated his FATHER'S ginger beard! While Mads was huffing about his eventual reddish brown face-pubes Tino released a smile on his soothed troll. "You'll be a very rugged mountain troll. Your kisses are going to tickle."
"I reiterate, cockasaurus away, pudgey Finn needs to get redressed." The Dane harped, now being sick of his facial hair being the object of ridicule. Siguard indulged his lover by standing and brushing the moss and dust from the log off the rear of his trousers. "Alright, alright. Lead on oh red bearded Thor."
"... That's more like it. Come on jay birds, haul ass."
Reply
Berwald pulled on his pants and shoved his feet into his boots, putting his own socks on Tino's feet where he sat on the log. Then Berwald squatted. "Climb on my Back Askling. You're not walking in stocking feet." Berwald ordered it would be no chore to piggy back his love back to camp. Pine needles HURT on bare feet and would poke right through wool socks.
Reply
"I'm no more a Fairy Prince than you."
"Well, yeah, but you're pretty enough to be a fairy prince, like something out of Hans Christian Andersen's stories." He bent down to press his lips into Siguard's hair.
"That makes you Little Tiny you idiot." Siguard huffed, but with a small smile, as he used Thumbelina's original, canonical story name.
"And you're just the right size for me." Leered the wolfish Dane. "Come on, lets get these soaked things to a line for Tino so they can dry out. Least he's not gonna need to wash'em."
Meanwhile, Tino was fumbling in trying to pull as much of Berwald's tunic up into his belt as possible so it didn't look like he was wearing a dress, but at the failure of this mission he just let it all hang and wrapped Siguard's cloak around him. "How are you not freezing?" Tino quipped at his lover. "And to think, I spent all of December laughing at you for being afraid of the cold, but, it looks like your blood thickened right back up you bastard." He chattered, reaching up to get his arms around the giant's shoulders as he was hoisted up to the top of Mt. Ber-Bear.
Reply
He was more concerned with Tino catching a chill. He wanted Tino in front of a fire in their hut, yesterday.
Maybe a snuggle wouldn't be amiss either. He could really use a few minutes of undivided Tino attention. Just holding him close for a little while, he would enjoy that. Tino always took the final edges off his distress once he was in control again.
Once the control was back and that damn monster was shoved back into the closet again, Tino was a balm to his nerves. There was something utterly magical about Tino, something that drew Berwald in and held him a willing prisoner.
He'd never be able to truly express how much Tino meant to him. How deeply Berwald NEEDED him like he needed air to breathe. Without Tino his life would frankly not be worth living.
"Care to cuddle with me a little by the fire Ti?" Berwald asked as they walked through the quiet dense forest.
Reply
"But I just really need to warm up first, I feel like I'm cold right down to my bones." He punctuated this by a shiver. Yes, he was dressed more now, but it would be a while until his body heat could build up under the chilled wool fabric. He tried to selfishly touch as much of Berwald's hot skin as possible by pressing his face into the crook of the Swede's neck, letting the molten blood passing through warm his face.
Reply
Once back in their hut, he bolted the door, dropped Tino lightly into their furs, threw more wood on the fire, stripped off his clothes and then crawled into bed. "Come let me warm you up beautiful. Get under these furs and blankets with me."
Reply
Once they were locked safely away in their little tiny den Tino smiled softly and slipped out of the wools he'd been wrapped in so as to snuggle skin to skin and buried himself under the pile of skins and furs with Berwald. "Thank you Rakas. I'm sorry, but I'm also not. I'd have done worse to get to you. Cold river water? I'll live... though uncomfortably, voi luoja." He chuckled, pulling and tugging on the Swede in an attempt to bury himself under the heavy warmth. "Spoon me, I'm cold." He requested, digging in and pressing his face into Berwald' pectoral muscles.
Reply
"I could warm up other bits of you if you'd like." Berwald playfully leered waggling his eyebrows.
Reply
Reply
Tino jumped and squirmed and Berwald held him prisoner. "You did say to warm up my hands, not HOW." Berwald smiled, sometimes Tino was just so *EASY* to bait.
Reply
Reply
And while he was down here, it was just a short trip a little further south...
Reply
Reply
Leave a comment