I just don't understand what happened.....
I don't get it....there are sooo many people that are suicidal..Why? I mean I don't wanna die...I just wanna live and live the best I can..I know eventually I will die as will everyone but why do people wanna die before they have to?...What is soo terrible to want that? If you fight and try life will eventually get better! I mean im not trying to preach to people but it's just I dont understand...I mean I have to soo much in life I am looking forward to..And I have to put this because its killing me...My sister is Mormon..and she is 19 she got married 3 months ago and is also pregnant and for some reason she says she is happy..But I know her she isnt she is scared and knows that she is now in too deep...She never see's or talks to me anymore...and she was my best friend....I don't know what is happening I keep on losing friends I mean me and kyle are like barley friends anymore he care's about like no one but himself his girlfriend and his mom he never call's me and he never come's over..and if he does he just ask's me a favor! I mean and then The thing that happened with Heather really is bugging me and I don't say anything to anyone..I keep trying to work through all of this but everyone wont just leave me alone and I can't handle being bothered by things that don't matter right now..I mean not one person will just let me be but Brittney and I love her for it!! She lets me be about things that don't have to be bothered with right now...I just don't know what to do I have soo much pressure on me right now to do good in school and to do this and do that I can't take it I just wanna be left alone to tell you the truth I want to have my sister and Kyle..and Heather back..The real Tiffany and kyle.....and Especially the real Heather I miss you guys soo much..and I don't know what to do im lost!!!!! I have always thought I had the answers to everything but right now im soo lost and soo confused...I just need some time hell maybe some help but for now im gonna do it on my own....whew that felt so good to let out.......
*_Becca_*