Ramble Time
Coming from such a small town, it's awesome to be able to just hop on the ferry and go to Manhattan whenever I feel like it. I feel like a city girl and, corny as it is, I feel like I'm finally grown up. I don't understand how the majority of my friends stuck together, or how so many people decided to go to schools so far away from the city. It's so incredible to actually get out there on your own, meet new people, and explore new places. I mean, obviously it has its drawbacks -- I haven't actually met that many people I'd like to hang out with yet, and I've already been on a subway to Brooklyn instead of to Times Square and gotten lost in SoHo for a few hours -- but at the same time I can feel myself changing for the better. My first couple days here I was pretty miserable, which I think was to be expected, and I really wished that I had gone to school with at least one other person I already knew. But I stuck it out and just went with the flow, and now I'm so glad that I decided not to go somewhere with all of them. I mean, I love them all and I probably will for the rest of my life, but it's nice to just... get away. I haven't seen anyone from home, aside from my family, for almost two months, and it's something of a relief. Going to a small school comes with so many little problems and dramas, and there's no room for growth or change when people have known you since you were six. I want to go home at Christmastime and see all of my friends, and I hope they'll all see the way I've changed over the years instead of seeing the me I was in first, fifth, eigth, and tenth grades. I mean, I was always the fat girl at my small highschool, but now that I'm here with two thousand other, real, people, I realized that I'm really not that heavy after all. I was just heavier than all of my size three friends. I'm kind of rambling now, but... yeah. I just hope that I come away from college having learned a lot and having gained a lot of experience, maybe in some ways that friends who went to other places won't.
At the same time, part of me wonders if it's just me who never really experienced these things before. Like, I've always been afraid to try new things, so wandering around the city without someone familiar with it is a big deal to me. But maybe to other people it's not, because they never had a problem doing it. It's hard to explain exactly what I mean...
Eh, whatever. I don't know if any of my friends from home are actually reading this -- hey guys -- but if they are, I want them to know that I do miss them, and I can't wait to see them in December.