(no subject)
I'm all moved into Smith, and am mostly settled in. It's great to see my friends (some are still coming back tomorrow and the next day), and I've met some cool first years and transfers- Meredith and Ally are HONS (heads of new students) for our house, so we get to meet all the newbies, and they're quite cool, from whom I've met so far. Tonight we played a game of Cranium, and Harper and I managed to defend our title as Reigning Champions, but not without a fight nearly to the death with Ally and Zoe, with strong resistance from Meredith/Dana and Kat/Dezirie/Ravena. All four teams were somewhere in the middle of the circle at once; it was intense!
It's been interesting to be back as a sophomore- seeing all the first years who are still getting acclimated, who barely know anyone and are making those critical first alliances and everything... it reminds me, of course, of this time last year, when I was a first year. How I was so thrilled to be at college and thought I was so grown-up, when now I realize that I wasn't, that I'm still not. And then it made me think back farther- remember when you were in seventh grade and thought you had the world figured out? I thought I finally wasn't a kid anymore and completely in tune to everything...and while I may not have been a literal "kid," I now know that I still have a LONG way to go, and I've changed so much from the person I was when I was 12 years old. It's just kind of funny because when I was 12, I thought I had reached my emotional maturity. And now I know that in no way was that the case.
So then I think, in a year or five or ten, what will I think when I think back on the Heather of fall 2005? I know from my feelings of looking back on myself at 12, or even 17, that I can never just say that I'm done growing, maturing, etc. That in ten years I might be a completely different person again. But then again...is there a time when we stop changing? I mean, I know that there isn't a time when we completely stop, that we're all constantly changing. But is there a time when we stop looking five or six years back and going, "Oh my GOD, I was like THAT?!" and instead just noticing small changes? And if so, when does that time come? It's weird to think about, and I guess the only way I'll find out will be to live it.
It's been interesting to be back as a sophomore- seeing all the first years who are still getting acclimated, who barely know anyone and are making those critical first alliances and everything... it reminds me, of course, of this time last year, when I was a first year. How I was so thrilled to be at college and thought I was so grown-up, when now I realize that I wasn't, that I'm still not. And then it made me think back farther- remember when you were in seventh grade and thought you had the world figured out? I thought I finally wasn't a kid anymore and completely in tune to everything...and while I may not have been a literal "kid," I now know that I still have a LONG way to go, and I've changed so much from the person I was when I was 12 years old. It's just kind of funny because when I was 12, I thought I had reached my emotional maturity. And now I know that in no way was that the case.
So then I think, in a year or five or ten, what will I think when I think back on the Heather of fall 2005? I know from my feelings of looking back on myself at 12, or even 17, that I can never just say that I'm done growing, maturing, etc. That in ten years I might be a completely different person again. But then again...is there a time when we stop changing? I mean, I know that there isn't a time when we completely stop, that we're all constantly changing. But is there a time when we stop looking five or six years back and going, "Oh my GOD, I was like THAT?!" and instead just noticing small changes? And if so, when does that time come? It's weird to think about, and I guess the only way I'll find out will be to live it.