Fic - Community; Found Each Other In The Murky Water
Title: Found Each Other In The Murky Water
Author: bergann
Fandom: Community
Pairing: Gen
Rating: PG
Spoilers: 1x05 "Advanced Criminal Law" and 1x08 "Home Economics". Sort of.
Word Count: 1 000
Summary: "Today is weird," he says, "Everyone's on these little non-dates."
Author's Note: I honestly don't know whether to class this as gen or pre-slash/het. It's entirely up to you. My intention was gen though. Title from a Kate Miller-Heidke song.
For picfor1000 with wine and cheese appetizer as my prompt.
"It's not that I'm not flattered," Jeff says, surveying the room. It has, by the looks of things, been cleaned with some effort. "But even in this place, I haven't quite yet reached the level where I'm willing to settle for a relationship where I'll wake up screaming in horror every morning."
"What?" Duncan says, and Jeff looks at the desk. On it are two wine-glasses. "Oh, no, Jeff -- this is not for you. No, this is for a lady friend."
"You take your dates to the school?" Jeff asks, eyebrows raised. "Classy."
"It's not a date, Jeff," Duncan chuckles, "It is merely two adults, one of whom happens to be of the female persuasion, meeting in my office for our final pool-court ordered psych appointments."
"You're still getting Britta to go to those?" Jeff says. "I figured she would've pushed you over by now."
"Sometimes, Jeffery, I wonder why we're friends."
"My name isn't Jeffery," Jeff says. "You said you had something for me."
"Oh yes," Duncan nods and starts rummaging through his desk. "I'm afraid I got a little caught up in the subtle gloating, but here -- an early birthday gift from me to you. Now, before you say that I shouldn't have, I will just say that this was my pleasure."
Jeff looks at the framed yellow piece of paper proclaiming BOOYAH! in his hands. "What is it?"
"I thought that'd be fairly obvious," Duncan says, "It's a reminder of the first lesson community college gave you."
"Wow," Jeff says, deadpan. "I don't know what to say."
Duncan smiles. "Your expression is thanks enough. Now, I think Britta will be here any moment, so if you wouldn't mind..."
"Leaving? Of course not." Jeff says, and heads out into the hall. He passes Britta a little further down. "On your way to therapy?"
"Don't joke," she says, frowning. "This is your fault. I could be home right now, taking a long bath."
Jeff nods understandingly. "I'd stay away from any drink he offers," he says, taking a step back for each word. "I once had to talk him out of an unfortunate accusation involving Rohypnol."
"What?" Britta asks, but he goes around the corner and is out of the Human Sciences building before she has the chance to follow.
*
Abed and Troy are in the library, like usual. Jeff can hear their voices, even if he can't see them from where he's standing. For a moment he thinks they're actually studying, since they have a habit of spreading out on the floor whenever they study on their own, which would be rare but not unprecedented.
He's just about to leave them to it, when there's a mechanical whirr and something blue shoots over the back of the couch and straight towards him. He hits the floor on instinct, a good call if the crash behind him is anything to go by, and Troy's head pops up over the couch. "My bad, man! I wasn't really paying attention and I should have, sorry. You alright?"
"Yeah," Jeff says, pushing himself up. Abed runs over and past, to the downed model airplane.
"It's okay," he says, with this little sigh of relief. "You really should have been looking, Troy."
"You started bad-mouthing James Bond!" Troy protests. "I got distracted!"
"You were bad-mouthing James Bond?"
"No," Abed says, looking hurt. "I merely said that it wouldn't be unheard of for James Bond to be a code name, same as M or Q, that is passed on from agent to agent, instead of James Bond being the same agent in every movie. It’d explain the agelessness and the personality changes that each actor gives the role."
"Huh," Jeff says, "You know, that actually makes sense."
Abed grins at him. Troy makes a noise of protest and moves out from behind the couch. "It's James Bond! He's like the Highlander, there can be only one!"
"You're not wearing pants," Jeff observes, "Why aren't you wearing pants?"
"It's raining outside," Troy says, ducking back behind the couch. "They got wet."
"He had to save her," Abed says, which makes no sense until Jeff looks over to see him wiggling the plane. "It looked very heroic, until he came inside and it just looked like he'd peed himself."
"Abed, I thought we agreed not to mention that."
"Sorry, I forgot," Abed says, disappearing behind the couch too. "Hey Jeff, you want some cheese?"
"What?"
"We were going have a picnic outside, but it started to rain, and now the cheese is kind of soggy. We also can't fly the plane very high because of the ceiling." Abed explains, "Indoor picnics aren't really fun."
"I think I'll just pass and leave you two to it," Jeff says, "I wouldn't want to intrude."
"It's a totally platonic picnic," Troy says, "But you tell Pierce anything about this, and I'll make you hurt, Seacrest."
Jeff snorts. "Yeah, okay. But may I just point out you're sitting on a picnic blanket, half-naked, eating cheese with another man. That's more than a little gay."
With the last word satisfyingly his, he leaves.
*
Annie's sitting on a bench outside under a roof, watching the rain come down. Jeff takes the seat next to her. "I gave Troy my grandmother's blanket again," she says.
"That's because you're an unnaturally kind person," he answers. "You need me to come with you to the hospital this time?"
She swats his arm. "No," she says, a small half-smile on her face. "I feel fine. It's Abed, after all."
"Today is weird," he says, "Everyone's on these little non-dates."
"And Shirley is trying to avoid one with Pierce," Annie agrees. "He wants to 'help' her with her rebound stage."
"Ooh," Jeff says, "That disaster should be fun."
"We're not on a non-date," Annie says after a moment.
"Well, word is there're new muffins in the cafeteria," he says, "We could be the first to check those bad boys out."
Annie smiles. "Okay."
Author: bergann
Fandom: Community
Pairing: Gen
Rating: PG
Spoilers: 1x05 "Advanced Criminal Law" and 1x08 "Home Economics". Sort of.
Word Count: 1 000
Summary: "Today is weird," he says, "Everyone's on these little non-dates."
Author's Note: I honestly don't know whether to class this as gen or pre-slash/het. It's entirely up to you. My intention was gen though. Title from a Kate Miller-Heidke song.
For picfor1000 with wine and cheese appetizer as my prompt.
"It's not that I'm not flattered," Jeff says, surveying the room. It has, by the looks of things, been cleaned with some effort. "But even in this place, I haven't quite yet reached the level where I'm willing to settle for a relationship where I'll wake up screaming in horror every morning."
"What?" Duncan says, and Jeff looks at the desk. On it are two wine-glasses. "Oh, no, Jeff -- this is not for you. No, this is for a lady friend."
"You take your dates to the school?" Jeff asks, eyebrows raised. "Classy."
"It's not a date, Jeff," Duncan chuckles, "It is merely two adults, one of whom happens to be of the female persuasion, meeting in my office for our final pool-court ordered psych appointments."
"You're still getting Britta to go to those?" Jeff says. "I figured she would've pushed you over by now."
"Sometimes, Jeffery, I wonder why we're friends."
"My name isn't Jeffery," Jeff says. "You said you had something for me."
"Oh yes," Duncan nods and starts rummaging through his desk. "I'm afraid I got a little caught up in the subtle gloating, but here -- an early birthday gift from me to you. Now, before you say that I shouldn't have, I will just say that this was my pleasure."
Jeff looks at the framed yellow piece of paper proclaiming BOOYAH! in his hands. "What is it?"
"I thought that'd be fairly obvious," Duncan says, "It's a reminder of the first lesson community college gave you."
"Wow," Jeff says, deadpan. "I don't know what to say."
Duncan smiles. "Your expression is thanks enough. Now, I think Britta will be here any moment, so if you wouldn't mind..."
"Leaving? Of course not." Jeff says, and heads out into the hall. He passes Britta a little further down. "On your way to therapy?"
"Don't joke," she says, frowning. "This is your fault. I could be home right now, taking a long bath."
Jeff nods understandingly. "I'd stay away from any drink he offers," he says, taking a step back for each word. "I once had to talk him out of an unfortunate accusation involving Rohypnol."
"What?" Britta asks, but he goes around the corner and is out of the Human Sciences building before she has the chance to follow.
*
Abed and Troy are in the library, like usual. Jeff can hear their voices, even if he can't see them from where he's standing. For a moment he thinks they're actually studying, since they have a habit of spreading out on the floor whenever they study on their own, which would be rare but not unprecedented.
He's just about to leave them to it, when there's a mechanical whirr and something blue shoots over the back of the couch and straight towards him. He hits the floor on instinct, a good call if the crash behind him is anything to go by, and Troy's head pops up over the couch. "My bad, man! I wasn't really paying attention and I should have, sorry. You alright?"
"Yeah," Jeff says, pushing himself up. Abed runs over and past, to the downed model airplane.
"It's okay," he says, with this little sigh of relief. "You really should have been looking, Troy."
"You started bad-mouthing James Bond!" Troy protests. "I got distracted!"
"You were bad-mouthing James Bond?"
"No," Abed says, looking hurt. "I merely said that it wouldn't be unheard of for James Bond to be a code name, same as M or Q, that is passed on from agent to agent, instead of James Bond being the same agent in every movie. It’d explain the agelessness and the personality changes that each actor gives the role."
"Huh," Jeff says, "You know, that actually makes sense."
Abed grins at him. Troy makes a noise of protest and moves out from behind the couch. "It's James Bond! He's like the Highlander, there can be only one!"
"You're not wearing pants," Jeff observes, "Why aren't you wearing pants?"
"It's raining outside," Troy says, ducking back behind the couch. "They got wet."
"He had to save her," Abed says, which makes no sense until Jeff looks over to see him wiggling the plane. "It looked very heroic, until he came inside and it just looked like he'd peed himself."
"Abed, I thought we agreed not to mention that."
"Sorry, I forgot," Abed says, disappearing behind the couch too. "Hey Jeff, you want some cheese?"
"What?"
"We were going have a picnic outside, but it started to rain, and now the cheese is kind of soggy. We also can't fly the plane very high because of the ceiling." Abed explains, "Indoor picnics aren't really fun."
"I think I'll just pass and leave you two to it," Jeff says, "I wouldn't want to intrude."
"It's a totally platonic picnic," Troy says, "But you tell Pierce anything about this, and I'll make you hurt, Seacrest."
Jeff snorts. "Yeah, okay. But may I just point out you're sitting on a picnic blanket, half-naked, eating cheese with another man. That's more than a little gay."
With the last word satisfyingly his, he leaves.
*
Annie's sitting on a bench outside under a roof, watching the rain come down. Jeff takes the seat next to her. "I gave Troy my grandmother's blanket again," she says.
"That's because you're an unnaturally kind person," he answers. "You need me to come with you to the hospital this time?"
She swats his arm. "No," she says, a small half-smile on her face. "I feel fine. It's Abed, after all."
"Today is weird," he says, "Everyone's on these little non-dates."
"And Shirley is trying to avoid one with Pierce," Annie agrees. "He wants to 'help' her with her rebound stage."
"Ooh," Jeff says, "That disaster should be fun."
"We're not on a non-date," Annie says after a moment.
"Well, word is there're new muffins in the cafeteria," he says, "We could be the first to check those bad boys out."
Annie smiles. "Okay."