(no subject)
for the most part, i am having some really down times as of late, and i dont know whats up. im oblivious to my surroundings, and yet my mind is so centered on peaks of pain and solitude. it seems as though it should not be that way, i feel like i should have a lot going for me currently, at least a few things i can count on and be happy about.i just keep focusing on things that are making me feel shitty, like the world would twist the knife in my back if they could. honestly, for the past week i have been around good people, but there is this reoccuring idea that there are a good deal of people who are no good. but i guess everyone needs to have their own agenda, i assume. i just have no drive to be a part of anyones anymore. im cant keep going out of my way for people, i devote too much energy about caring for the things that will never give an inch back. i can tell for the most part, people dont even believe that is true, but i feel like it is. i cant assume i can live by this idea, but when im ready to start pushing again i will know, and in turn i will hopefully be happier with my choices. regardless, this is over for me. no turning back