Fic: It Cannot Be Undone, Tokio Hotel, Gustav/Tom, Georg/Bill, R
Title: It Cannot Be Undone
Author: Beren
Fandom: Tokio Hotel RPS
Pairing: Gustav/Tom, Georg/Bill
Rating: R (for naughty words and sexual situations)
Disclaimer: This is a work of fiction, the real people in it are used without their permission and I definitely don't own them or have any copyright to any part of any of them. I do not believe any of this happened, is likely to happen or should happen it is simply a story created around known facts about those involved.
Warnings: none
Summary: Sequel to What's Done is Done - Bill and Georg's new relationship has an effect on Tom that neither of the twins could have guessed at.
Author's Notes: Written for icarusdefiled in the charity vgift meme thingy (go check it out). A sequel to What's Done is Done with Tom/Gusti was requested and I hope this fits the bill. Thanks to Soph for the beta.
Word count: 5,145
My Fanfic Listings (LJ) | My Fanfic Listings (DreamW)
Tom woke up feeling very bizarre. He'd been dreaming most of the night; sex dreams, which weren't that unusual, but they had been odd. Usually when he dreamed about sex it was all buxom blondes with curvy figures and great legs. However, his dreams had been a lot more amorphous that night, his dream woman had been very vague, more heavily set and stronger than his fantasy females usually were. He liked to be the one in control of sex, only in his dream he definitely hadn't been and, given the state of his sheets, he'd enjoyed it one hell of a lot.
He was willing to admit he was a little off balance when he headed to breakfast. They had meetings all day, so it was an early start, which was why he probably didn't react as well as he should have.
"What the fuck?" he said very loudly when Bill and Georg appeared.
The way Bill was walking and smiling meant only one thing; Bill had got laid. With the way Bill was holding onto Georg and Georg was looking still half asleep, Tom knew exactly who Bill had been laid by. Tom knew Bill had a thing for Georg; it wasn't as if Bill tried to keep things like that a secret, but Georg was happily attached to Dana. For once Tom didn't know what to think.
Gustav looked up from where he was eating cereal and appeared half shocked and half relieved. Tom didn't have time to think about that, however; he was more focused on Bill.
"Good morning," Bill all but chirped and sat down, clearly glowing with happiness.
Tom looked over Georg again and saw the edge of something on Georg's neck under his scarf. He could not believe it, but the evidence was right there in front of him
"You didn't?" he said, even though he knew what the answer would be.
"We did," Bill replied with a bright smile.
"What about Dana?" he asked, since they liked Dana; she had been very good for Georg.
He could not believe Bill had just charged in and taken Georg from her.
"Complicated," was what Bill said and appeared momentarily sad, "and no one's fault."
When Tom looked at Georg, his friend nodded and neither Bill nor Georg appeared overly guilty, so Tom knew something extraordinary must have happened. He was, however, going to have to wait for an explanation since Gustav was already at the table and David chose then to sit down.
"Raring to go, I hope," David greeted them cheerfully.
They had a very full day ahead of them.
"Definitely," Bill replied and beamed at their manager while leaning over to grab some fruit.
It seemed to be the kiss Bill planted on Georg when sitting back in his place that caught David's attention. Tom really couldn't blame David for the astounded expression, he felt a little the same way, not that he was surprised that Bill was not hiding the new relationship.
"What?" David asked a little helplessly and looked at Georg. "Dana?"
"Over," Georg said in a perfectly calm tone, "mutually. This is how it is now."
Bill looked utterly delighted to not have to be the one to explain and rewarded Georg with another kiss.
"How it's always going to be," Georg added and Bill squealed in delight.
Breakfast went downhill from there and ended with Bill telling David exactly what was the reality from now on. Tom knew the press was going to have a field day, but he could see how devoted Bill was to Georg already and he brought a stop to the argument by growling at David to deal with it and pulling Bill off so they could have a chat.
===
After the explanation from Bill about bonds flipping and rather too much information about just how Georg and Bill had spent the night, Tom knew what was going on. However, that didn't mean he had everything worked out in his head yet. Their day from hell had passed in a bit of a blur if he was honest, as half his brain dealt with what was going on. The fact that Bill was radiantly happy helped. When Bill was happy like that, eventually everyone was happy like that and Tom couldn't begrudge his twin the simple joy.
It was just that he found himself feeling a little out of sorts. He wasn't sure if it was because Bill was so close to Georg now or what, but he was unsettled. When they had returned to the hotel, he had had the obligatory talk with Georg along the lines of, hurt Bill and I hurt you, but that hadn't helped either. He'd ended up dragging Gustav to the bar where they'd had a couple of drinks and not even the very well endowed, brunette barmaid had been able to take his mind off everything. The young woman had clearly known who they were and had basically thrown herself at him and he had said no.
Back in his room, preparing to go to sleep, he couldn't help thinking he might be losing it a little. Getting laid would have relaxed him and given him something else to think about, but as it was he fell asleep wondering if Gustav might want to hang out when they got home. Bill was going to be obsessed with Georg for a while at least and he doubted the two would be apart much until the move to L.A.
He dreamed of sex again, only this time there was nothing vague about his partner. The reason the blond in his bed was so strong was that she was a he and Tom was sure he knew the muscled body that held him down and rutted against him. It was good, very, very good as their cocks rubbed against each other. It was dream sex, so frankly it was fantastic, even though he'd never considered a male partner before. The payoff made his whole body spasm in ecstasy and only as it died away did he look his partner in the face.
The shock woke him up.
"Oh fuck!"
====
"Okay, tell me what's wrong," Bill said the moment they stepped through the door of their current home.
The dogs would be back from their parents in about an hour, but until then they were alone. Tom suspected Georg would be back in about that time as well. He was trying very hard not to resent Georg for what was going on.
"You turned me gay," he finally said bluntly.
Bill blinked at him.
"Come again?"
"You turned me gay," Tom repeated, because he was absolutely sure of his facts. He had been checking things all the way home. "And not only that; you turned me gay and I seem to be obsessed with Gustav."
There was no point in not getting it all out there.
Bill appeared stunned.
"How is that even possible?" was the very sensible question.
"I don't know," Tom replied and it sounded a little petulant, but he was going through a crisis, so he felt it was okay, "something to do with the bond and us being twins. All I know is that girls don't do it for me anymore; I checked, and Gustav does. I dreamed about him all last night and you know what I usually dream about when we're not sharing them."
"Oh."
"Yes, oh is right. I am fucked."
Bill put a gentle hand on his arm.
"It might just be a temporary thing," Bill suggested quietly, "overload from me. I know I've been a bit obsessed, but I can't help it."
Placing his fingers over Bill's, Tom looked at his twin and sighed; he didn't want Bill to feel guilty. The mating bond was the best thing that could ever happen to a vampire; Bill had every right to be deliriously happy.
"Maybe," he said eventually, "it's just confusing."
Without saying anything Bill drew him into a hug.
"When Mum gets here we'll ask her," Bill said and Tom had to agree.
====
Tom knew he was dreaming. Lucid dreaming was something he and Bill had been able to do from an early age and it was a talent their mum thought might turn into dream walking in a century or two. He didn't always try to control his dreams, but his mum had suggested he try it when they had talked. She had no explanation for what was going on and lucid dreaming was a way to help find out.
He was sitting on a tour bus with Bill and Georg, and they were laughing and joking about the last concert, but something wasn't right. The balance was off and it finally occurred to him what was missing.
"Where's Gustav?" he asked, wondering why their drummer was absent.
"He went to bed," Bill said, much more interested in Georg it seemed.
"Yeah," Georg added with a laugh, "you know the old man needs his sleep these days."
That made Bill giggle as well and for some reason Tom didn't find it funny.
"Oh, okay," he said, not really feeling okay at all, "I think I might turn is as well; leave you two love birds to it."
"Night, Tomi," was all Bill replied and he could tell his twin was already too wrapped up in Georg to really care.
Tom headed down the bus and it was like their first tour bus with all of them on the same one. On this bus he had to walk past Gustav's bunk to get to his own and he found himself stopping. Something wasn't right and before he could stop himself he was pulling back the curtain on Gustav's bunk. He froze in shock.
There was Gustav, his Gustav, only he wasn't, because he was looking at a wizened old man. He could not think and it only dawned on him slowly that he could see no signs of life from the man in the bunk. With a shaking hand he reached out and felt for a pulse. There was nothing.
"Bill!" he screamed at the top of his voice.
Bill was by his shoulder almost instantly, Georg not far behind and Bill leant in to touch Gustav as well.
"Oh no," Bill said quietly, "poor Juschtel."
"He did say this would probably be his last tour," Georg said sadly; "his heart wasn't good."
Tom could do nothing but stare as he felt his world falling apart.
Only when Bill turned away and walked back up the bus did he remember it was a dream. Taking control he forced himself to wake up, but he still came out of it shaking and sweating with the feeling of devastation in his heart. Climbing out of bed, he left the dogs and went to find Bill; this was too much for him.
====
Looking at himself in the mirror, Tom finally made his decision. If he was going to do this he was going to do it properly and he needed Bill's help. Over the last two days he had come to realise that what was happening to him was not temporary, in fact it seemed to be getting exponentially worse. He was obsessing over Gustav and they were heading to L.A. in a few days so he didn't have long to figure it out. He hated to think what his mind and body might throw at him with an ocean between himself and Gustav. With that in mind, he had realised it was time to face facts and deal with them.
Walking out of his room, he trotted down the stairs and to where Bill and Georg were curled up on the sofa together watching a movie.
"Um, Bill," he said, feeling quite unsure of himself.
His twin looked up immediately and Bill needed no more encouragement.
"Sorry, Geo," Bill said and pecked his boyfriend on the cheek, "I have to go help Tom for a little while."
Clearly Tom's anxiety was showing on his face, because Georg took one look at him and immediately released Bill from his embrace.
"Okay," was Georg's only input into the conversation and then Tom was running back up the stairs with Bill close behind.
Neither of them spoke until they were in Tom's room.
"What do you need?" Bill asked simply when Tom turned to face him.
"These gone," Tom said and pointed at his head; he knew Gustav was very much not a fan of the cornrows.
He'd only just had them redone, but he was determined.
"Tom," Bill said, walking up to him and putting a delicate hand on his shoulder, "if he's going to take you, I'm sure he'll take you, hair and all."
"I know," he replied, because he was well aware that Gustav was not that shallow, "but that's not the point."
"Oh," Bill said, catching on and nodding, "you want to make him happy without him having to ask."
Tom nodded. His instincts still felt alien, but they weren't going away and he knew he had to start adjusting. The idea of not being able to entice Gustav to him, of never completing the bond that would allow him to eventually share his immortality, of watching Gustav grow old and die, filled him with complete dread.
"Okay," Bill agreed and gave him a supportive smile, "let's sit down."
Nearly two hours and quite a lot of screeching later, Tom no longer had cornrows. In fact, Bill had washed, trimmed a tiny bit, and styled his hair for him. It was a lot different from his usual style, much less gangster, but Bill had done a good job. There was nothing too girly about it and the more Tom looked at it, he had to admit, the more he liked it.
"Thanks," he said and smiled at his twin as Bill held the mirror for him.
It was only a new hairstyle and yet he felt kind of new to go with the new feelings that were slowly taking him over. David would probably have a cow and even more people would get him and Bill mixed up, but it was worth it. He'd probably get a dye job and slowly go back to his natural colour, but he wasn't sure about that yet.
"Are you going to go over and see him now?" Bill asked, putting the mirror back on the dressing table.
Tom nodded; that was his plan, at least he thought it was. He was still a little confused about everything and nervous as hell. Bill leaned forward and hugged him.
"I'm sorry," Bill said quietly, "I never meant for this to happen, but it's worth it, I promise."
Tom hugged back; he didn't blame Bill. No one had foreseen how one twin's encounter could affect the other.
"Nothing to be sorry for," he said, and he meant it. "Did you ever think it might have been me all these years making you think you liked girls too?"
From the look on Bill's face when Tom pulled back, that idea had not crossed his twin's mind. They were so close, so completely in tune; they had just never realised quite how close.
"Good luck," was all Bill chose to say. "If all else fails, kiss him; it's what I did."
====
Tom had been rehearsing what to say all the way over to Gustav's place, but when the door opened and Gustav was right there, all words deserted him.
"Tom?" Gustav said, sounding surprised. "What had you done with your hair?"
He suddenly felt as if he was under a microscope and ran his fingers through is hair nervously.
"Looks good," Gustav said and smiled, "come on in."
Gustav was very good at ignoring people's nervous habits and Tom was very glad as he stepped inside. His brain was, frankly, blank, which meant he was playing the edge of his shirt and probably looked about thirteen.
"Want a beer?" Gustav asked and moved past him to lead him into the kitchen.
"Yeah, sure, thanks."
At least it gave him a few seconds respite, but he was still no closer to what he wanted to say when Gustav handed him a bottle.
"What's up?" Gustav asked, clearly aware that there was something on his mind.
"Um," was about all Tom could come up with to start, "it's ... y'know ... L.A. and stuff ..."
They had talked about the move to L.A. a lot over the past few months. The break-in had been the last straw and the whole band agreed it was for the best.
"Are you having second thoughts?" Gustav asked, looking concerned.
Tom really had no words. When it came to talking about unimportant things he could rattle on for hours; sometimes he was worse than Bill, but not when it came to personal things. He was actually kind of shy and this was important. Taking a deep breath, he took Bill's advice and just acted for a change.
His lips connected with Gustav's in a very ungraceful way and he drew back almost immediately, but the stunned look on Gustav's face let him know his message had been received. For a little while neither of them moved. Tom's rather panicked breathing was the only sound in the room.
"What the hell?" Gustav finally asked.
"What do you think?" Tom really didn't think he needed to explain himself.
"But you like girls," Gustav pointed out as if it was written in stone, "you..."
"Did," Tom interrupted before his friend could go on, "I did like girls."
He was abjectly terrified that Gustav was just going to throw him out or hit him or something. There was no rationale behind this mate stuff; he didn't understand it, but Bill and Georg's consummation of their bond had changed everything for him.
"Things like that don't just change," Gustav countered.
"They do when you're not human," Tom blurted out.
Gustav did not move, did not say anything; the drummer just stood there.
"What?" was the quiet question that came eventually.
Tom closed his eyes and tried to sort out his racing thoughts.
"Not human," he said, fearing what he would see when he looked back at Gustav. "Bill and I, we're not like you, we never have been. We're vampires."
It probably should have surprised him more when Gustav just accepted that and seemed to believe him.
"You knew," he said as he thought about it.
"I knew you weren't normal," Gustav replied immediately, "but I didn't know how. It never really mattered."
What that secret said about Gustav's character was huge. People didn't usually react to different quite so well.
"What happened between Georg and Bill?"
It was the kind of intelligent question that Tom knew he should have expected from his friend.
"Bill has always had a thing for Georg," he began to explain.
"I know," Gustav admitted.
Tom chalked another point up to the drummer.
"What we didn't realise is that Georg had a thing for Bill as well," he just continued to explain.
From the look on Gustav's face he hadn't know that bit either.
"Dana is a vampire as well and we were happy for them," Tom decided Gustav needed the whole story, "but something went wrong. She tried to form a bond with Georg, so that she could eventually share her immortality with him. It didn't work because of the connection between Bill and Georg, in fact it had the opposite effect of pushing them apart. Bill had to explain to Georg and they decided to go for it. Georg is going to come stay with us for a while once we're settled in in L.A."
He felt as if his soul was on display as Gustav just watched him and digested that information.
"And something about their bond has affected you," Gustav eventually said.
It wasn't a question, but Tom nodded anyway.
"I'm honestly beginning to think that Bill might have only ever liked girls because of what I was up to," he shared his reasoning, "and now that he's gone one step further than me everything has flipped on its head."
He had no other way to explain it. No one really understood the connection he had with Bill, not even his mother and she was nearly a hundred years old. Even a call to their grandparents, the real ones, not the ones who were actually family friends, had provided no ideas. Twins were rarer in vampire circles than they were in human ones.
"That doesn't explain why you've come to me."
Gustav's next point brought him back from his musings.
"I can't explain that either," he admitted with complete honesty, since he had less of an idea about that than the rest, "but it happens to be real. I think," he added, "because we don't have a lot of time, because we're going away, everything might had sped up. You're one of my three best friends, I used to love you like a brother, but that's kind of changed."
"I'd hope so," was the rather dry reply, "I'm pretty sure you and Bill aren't that close."
If Gustav was making jokes, Tom was pretty sure it couldn't be all bad.
"But why me?" Gustav asked, growing serious again.
"I've got a list if you want to hear it," he replied, since that was one thing he had thought about.
A small nod, as if Gustav didn't quite believe him, was his only response to that.
"Okay," he said, taking a swig of his beer and organising the thoughts in his head: "you're intelligent and dependable; your glasses as so incredibly sexy; you don't take shit from anyone; you have muscles that go on forever; you're incredibly strong and god your stamina; you ..."
"Okay," Gustav held up his hand and of all things, he seemed to be blushing.
Tom hadn't meant to embarrass his friend and they stared awkwardly at each other for a little while. Without his conscious consent his free hand moved back to his hair.
"You know, if you keep doing that you'll ruin the style Bill did for you."
It seemed Gustav no longer wanted to talk about himself.
"How did you know Bill did it?" Tom asked, trying to go with the flow.
That managed to raise a smile out of the drummer at least.
"Tom, you've had two hair styles since I've known you; both required very little input from you. Of course Bill did it."
The logic was irrefutable, so Tom just gave a little shrug.
"You like it though?" he couldn't help himself, he had to ask.
For a few seconds Gustav appeared very unsure, but then he nodded. "Yes, I like it."
More uncomfortable silence descended, but Tom began to hope he wasn't chasing dreams that would be broken. Gustav hadn't bodily removed him from the house yet after all.
"You changed it for me?" was the next question.
Tom nodded. "I want to prove that I mean it."
They had been friends for half their lives and yet this was so new it was as if they barely understood each other. Gustav had made it clear on several occasions that he didn't care about people's sexual orientations; it was each to their own, but Tom had only ever seen Gustav pursue girls.
"I've never ... with a guy."
It seemed his observations had been correct.
"Me either," he replied; "never wanted to until now."
"Oh, I've wanted to," was the surprising comment that came back, "but with you and Bill in the equation is didn't seem worth the risk."
"Me and Bill?" Things were definitely looking up.
"I like androgynous boys," Gustav admitted, seemingly willing to bare all now; "and you do that as well as Bill sometimes."
Suddenly his desire to drop some of the macho stuff was beginning to make sense. Vampire instincts were funny things, but they were usually right. Tom was never going to be Bill, but the little tweaks he felt like making appeared to have a reason.
"What do you want?"
It was a plain and simple question, but it had so many answers.
"I want to bite you," Tom started with the first thing that jumped into his head, "I want to kiss you; I want you to fuck me until I can't sit down; I want to ..."
He was cut off by lips on his own and Gustav might have been shorter than him, but that didn't stop who was in control. His back connected with the kitchen counter and Gustav's fingers were in his hair and he just let it all happen. He kissed back, but it was Gustav's tongue that plundered his mouth and Gustav's hands that touched him. In a way it was alien, the opposite to how he had always had these encounters before, but he was revelling in it.
"I think," Gustav said breathlessly when they finally broke apart, "that we already have the friendship part down; we should try the fucking part and make sure we both enjoy it."
That sounded like an incredibly sensible plan and Tom couldn't say yes fast enough. They shed clothes as they headed for the bedroom, never stopping touching all the way and there was more kissing and groping and then Tom found himself on his knees. He had never, ever sucked cock before, but he wanted to like his life depended on it. Just the way Gustav's fingers laced through and pulled his hair as he did his best to give the best blow job in the universe made him glad he had decided on the change. He loved it, even when Gustav forcefully pulled him off and pushed him onto the bed.
Part of him trembled at the idea of being fucked; he knew enough to know that it would probably hurt a little the first time, but part of him was also trembling with delight. The idea of being laid bare, opened and speared filled him with such need that he wanted it right then. He had prepared, just in case; he was clean, but that didn't mean he was ready.
The fact that Gustav had condoms and lube, said a lot about how prepared their drummer was for every eventuality, but Tom soon found out Gustav knew what he was doing as well. Gustav's strong, calloused fingers pushed into him with ease. All he had to do was lay back and surrender as Gustav prepared him with a skill that belied it being the first time. It was as Gustav found his prostate that a little light went on inside his head and he realised Gustav had probably done this to himself. That thought alone almost had him coming on the spot.
When Gustav finally pushed into him, that strong body looming above him, it was wonderful and it was not so wonderful all at the same time. It hurt, more than a little, and they had several false starts, but eventually his body got with the program and then it mostly just blew his mind.
Tom had honestly never had a sexual experience like it. He wanted it so damn much and who he was with mattered so completely that he had no control at all. When he came he was pretty sure he screamed Gustav's name and his orgasm seemed to go on forever. He felt Gustav come, shuddering against him after a couple more thrusts, but that was about as much sense as the world made for a while. At some point Gustav pulled out and lay down next to him and he finally came back to himself to find that he was curled over his lover's side and onto the wide, muscled chest.
As soon as he opened his eyes he knew that his vampire sense were fully online and he breathed in the scent of sex and Gustav all at once. His fangs were down and he knew what he wanted, but he wasn't sure Gustav would. He ran his hand slowly up Gustav's chest and finally lifted himself up so that he was looking into his lover's face.
"Well I enjoyed that," he said, not trying to hide the reality of what he was.
Then he waited and allowed Gustav to just look at him.
"So did I," Gustav replied eventually and reached up to touch his face.
Gustav appeared fascinated.
"Are you stronger than me?" Gustav asked in a quiet, contemplative tone.
"Yes," Tom replied; he was not about to lie, "but I like playing human for you."
He had enjoyed being dominated. It seemed to be part of who he was now and he liked that.
"Of course, we can switch sometimes if you want," he added with a smile, deliberately showing off his fangs.
That earned him a smile back.
"What happens when you bite me?"
Tom definitely took notice of the 'when' not an 'if'.
"Pleasure," he replied, "nothing else if you don't want it yet."
He wanted to bite and to form the bond, but he was well aware Gustav might not. The idea of Gustav growing old and dying flashed in his mind and he closed his eyes, trying to banish it. It was so wrong.
"Tom," Gustav's worried tone brought him back and a gentle touch made him open his eyes, "what's wrong."
It made him feel so vulnerable, but he couldn't lie. "I've been having nightmares. I keep seeing you and you ..." He didn't want to voice it. "You die without letting me stop it."
"Does this bond make me immortal?" Gustav asked in such a gentle tone that Tom felt as if he must be being a real idiot.
He shook his head.
"No, but it sets a point that I can take you back to when you're ready," he explained. "It would make it real."
For a while Gustav didn't say anything, ever the man of thought and few words.
"You're beautiful," was what the drummer decided to say in the end, "and I think I love this new you even more than I did the old one."
Tom thought his heart might beat out of his chest; Gustav loved him.
"Bite me," Gustav told him sincerely, "make me yours."
Gustav's blood was sweet and fine and like sunshine on a summer's day. It filled Tom with warmth and such a feeling of wholeness that it was the most natural thing in the world to reach out with his power and wind his essence with his lover's. Nothing had ever felt so easy or so right and he finally understood why Bill had been looking so blissfully happy over the last few days. This was how it was supposed to be.
The End
Author: Beren
Fandom: Tokio Hotel RPS
Pairing: Gustav/Tom, Georg/Bill
Rating: R (for naughty words and sexual situations)
Disclaimer: This is a work of fiction, the real people in it are used without their permission and I definitely don't own them or have any copyright to any part of any of them. I do not believe any of this happened, is likely to happen or should happen it is simply a story created around known facts about those involved.
Warnings: none
Summary: Sequel to What's Done is Done - Bill and Georg's new relationship has an effect on Tom that neither of the twins could have guessed at.
Author's Notes: Written for icarusdefiled in the charity vgift meme thingy (go check it out). A sequel to What's Done is Done with Tom/Gusti was requested and I hope this fits the bill. Thanks to Soph for the beta.
Word count: 5,145
My Fanfic Listings (LJ) | My Fanfic Listings (DreamW)
Tom woke up feeling very bizarre. He'd been dreaming most of the night; sex dreams, which weren't that unusual, but they had been odd. Usually when he dreamed about sex it was all buxom blondes with curvy figures and great legs. However, his dreams had been a lot more amorphous that night, his dream woman had been very vague, more heavily set and stronger than his fantasy females usually were. He liked to be the one in control of sex, only in his dream he definitely hadn't been and, given the state of his sheets, he'd enjoyed it one hell of a lot.
He was willing to admit he was a little off balance when he headed to breakfast. They had meetings all day, so it was an early start, which was why he probably didn't react as well as he should have.
"What the fuck?" he said very loudly when Bill and Georg appeared.
The way Bill was walking and smiling meant only one thing; Bill had got laid. With the way Bill was holding onto Georg and Georg was looking still half asleep, Tom knew exactly who Bill had been laid by. Tom knew Bill had a thing for Georg; it wasn't as if Bill tried to keep things like that a secret, but Georg was happily attached to Dana. For once Tom didn't know what to think.
Gustav looked up from where he was eating cereal and appeared half shocked and half relieved. Tom didn't have time to think about that, however; he was more focused on Bill.
"Good morning," Bill all but chirped and sat down, clearly glowing with happiness.
Tom looked over Georg again and saw the edge of something on Georg's neck under his scarf. He could not believe it, but the evidence was right there in front of him
"You didn't?" he said, even though he knew what the answer would be.
"We did," Bill replied with a bright smile.
"What about Dana?" he asked, since they liked Dana; she had been very good for Georg.
He could not believe Bill had just charged in and taken Georg from her.
"Complicated," was what Bill said and appeared momentarily sad, "and no one's fault."
When Tom looked at Georg, his friend nodded and neither Bill nor Georg appeared overly guilty, so Tom knew something extraordinary must have happened. He was, however, going to have to wait for an explanation since Gustav was already at the table and David chose then to sit down.
"Raring to go, I hope," David greeted them cheerfully.
They had a very full day ahead of them.
"Definitely," Bill replied and beamed at their manager while leaning over to grab some fruit.
It seemed to be the kiss Bill planted on Georg when sitting back in his place that caught David's attention. Tom really couldn't blame David for the astounded expression, he felt a little the same way, not that he was surprised that Bill was not hiding the new relationship.
"What?" David asked a little helplessly and looked at Georg. "Dana?"
"Over," Georg said in a perfectly calm tone, "mutually. This is how it is now."
Bill looked utterly delighted to not have to be the one to explain and rewarded Georg with another kiss.
"How it's always going to be," Georg added and Bill squealed in delight.
Breakfast went downhill from there and ended with Bill telling David exactly what was the reality from now on. Tom knew the press was going to have a field day, but he could see how devoted Bill was to Georg already and he brought a stop to the argument by growling at David to deal with it and pulling Bill off so they could have a chat.
===
After the explanation from Bill about bonds flipping and rather too much information about just how Georg and Bill had spent the night, Tom knew what was going on. However, that didn't mean he had everything worked out in his head yet. Their day from hell had passed in a bit of a blur if he was honest, as half his brain dealt with what was going on. The fact that Bill was radiantly happy helped. When Bill was happy like that, eventually everyone was happy like that and Tom couldn't begrudge his twin the simple joy.
It was just that he found himself feeling a little out of sorts. He wasn't sure if it was because Bill was so close to Georg now or what, but he was unsettled. When they had returned to the hotel, he had had the obligatory talk with Georg along the lines of, hurt Bill and I hurt you, but that hadn't helped either. He'd ended up dragging Gustav to the bar where they'd had a couple of drinks and not even the very well endowed, brunette barmaid had been able to take his mind off everything. The young woman had clearly known who they were and had basically thrown herself at him and he had said no.
Back in his room, preparing to go to sleep, he couldn't help thinking he might be losing it a little. Getting laid would have relaxed him and given him something else to think about, but as it was he fell asleep wondering if Gustav might want to hang out when they got home. Bill was going to be obsessed with Georg for a while at least and he doubted the two would be apart much until the move to L.A.
He dreamed of sex again, only this time there was nothing vague about his partner. The reason the blond in his bed was so strong was that she was a he and Tom was sure he knew the muscled body that held him down and rutted against him. It was good, very, very good as their cocks rubbed against each other. It was dream sex, so frankly it was fantastic, even though he'd never considered a male partner before. The payoff made his whole body spasm in ecstasy and only as it died away did he look his partner in the face.
The shock woke him up.
"Oh fuck!"
====
"Okay, tell me what's wrong," Bill said the moment they stepped through the door of their current home.
The dogs would be back from their parents in about an hour, but until then they were alone. Tom suspected Georg would be back in about that time as well. He was trying very hard not to resent Georg for what was going on.
"You turned me gay," he finally said bluntly.
Bill blinked at him.
"Come again?"
"You turned me gay," Tom repeated, because he was absolutely sure of his facts. He had been checking things all the way home. "And not only that; you turned me gay and I seem to be obsessed with Gustav."
There was no point in not getting it all out there.
Bill appeared stunned.
"How is that even possible?" was the very sensible question.
"I don't know," Tom replied and it sounded a little petulant, but he was going through a crisis, so he felt it was okay, "something to do with the bond and us being twins. All I know is that girls don't do it for me anymore; I checked, and Gustav does. I dreamed about him all last night and you know what I usually dream about when we're not sharing them."
"Oh."
"Yes, oh is right. I am fucked."
Bill put a gentle hand on his arm.
"It might just be a temporary thing," Bill suggested quietly, "overload from me. I know I've been a bit obsessed, but I can't help it."
Placing his fingers over Bill's, Tom looked at his twin and sighed; he didn't want Bill to feel guilty. The mating bond was the best thing that could ever happen to a vampire; Bill had every right to be deliriously happy.
"Maybe," he said eventually, "it's just confusing."
Without saying anything Bill drew him into a hug.
"When Mum gets here we'll ask her," Bill said and Tom had to agree.
====
Tom knew he was dreaming. Lucid dreaming was something he and Bill had been able to do from an early age and it was a talent their mum thought might turn into dream walking in a century or two. He didn't always try to control his dreams, but his mum had suggested he try it when they had talked. She had no explanation for what was going on and lucid dreaming was a way to help find out.
He was sitting on a tour bus with Bill and Georg, and they were laughing and joking about the last concert, but something wasn't right. The balance was off and it finally occurred to him what was missing.
"Where's Gustav?" he asked, wondering why their drummer was absent.
"He went to bed," Bill said, much more interested in Georg it seemed.
"Yeah," Georg added with a laugh, "you know the old man needs his sleep these days."
That made Bill giggle as well and for some reason Tom didn't find it funny.
"Oh, okay," he said, not really feeling okay at all, "I think I might turn is as well; leave you two love birds to it."
"Night, Tomi," was all Bill replied and he could tell his twin was already too wrapped up in Georg to really care.
Tom headed down the bus and it was like their first tour bus with all of them on the same one. On this bus he had to walk past Gustav's bunk to get to his own and he found himself stopping. Something wasn't right and before he could stop himself he was pulling back the curtain on Gustav's bunk. He froze in shock.
There was Gustav, his Gustav, only he wasn't, because he was looking at a wizened old man. He could not think and it only dawned on him slowly that he could see no signs of life from the man in the bunk. With a shaking hand he reached out and felt for a pulse. There was nothing.
"Bill!" he screamed at the top of his voice.
Bill was by his shoulder almost instantly, Georg not far behind and Bill leant in to touch Gustav as well.
"Oh no," Bill said quietly, "poor Juschtel."
"He did say this would probably be his last tour," Georg said sadly; "his heart wasn't good."
Tom could do nothing but stare as he felt his world falling apart.
Only when Bill turned away and walked back up the bus did he remember it was a dream. Taking control he forced himself to wake up, but he still came out of it shaking and sweating with the feeling of devastation in his heart. Climbing out of bed, he left the dogs and went to find Bill; this was too much for him.
====
Looking at himself in the mirror, Tom finally made his decision. If he was going to do this he was going to do it properly and he needed Bill's help. Over the last two days he had come to realise that what was happening to him was not temporary, in fact it seemed to be getting exponentially worse. He was obsessing over Gustav and they were heading to L.A. in a few days so he didn't have long to figure it out. He hated to think what his mind and body might throw at him with an ocean between himself and Gustav. With that in mind, he had realised it was time to face facts and deal with them.
Walking out of his room, he trotted down the stairs and to where Bill and Georg were curled up on the sofa together watching a movie.
"Um, Bill," he said, feeling quite unsure of himself.
His twin looked up immediately and Bill needed no more encouragement.
"Sorry, Geo," Bill said and pecked his boyfriend on the cheek, "I have to go help Tom for a little while."
Clearly Tom's anxiety was showing on his face, because Georg took one look at him and immediately released Bill from his embrace.
"Okay," was Georg's only input into the conversation and then Tom was running back up the stairs with Bill close behind.
Neither of them spoke until they were in Tom's room.
"What do you need?" Bill asked simply when Tom turned to face him.
"These gone," Tom said and pointed at his head; he knew Gustav was very much not a fan of the cornrows.
He'd only just had them redone, but he was determined.
"Tom," Bill said, walking up to him and putting a delicate hand on his shoulder, "if he's going to take you, I'm sure he'll take you, hair and all."
"I know," he replied, because he was well aware that Gustav was not that shallow, "but that's not the point."
"Oh," Bill said, catching on and nodding, "you want to make him happy without him having to ask."
Tom nodded. His instincts still felt alien, but they weren't going away and he knew he had to start adjusting. The idea of not being able to entice Gustav to him, of never completing the bond that would allow him to eventually share his immortality, of watching Gustav grow old and die, filled him with complete dread.
"Okay," Bill agreed and gave him a supportive smile, "let's sit down."
Nearly two hours and quite a lot of screeching later, Tom no longer had cornrows. In fact, Bill had washed, trimmed a tiny bit, and styled his hair for him. It was a lot different from his usual style, much less gangster, but Bill had done a good job. There was nothing too girly about it and the more Tom looked at it, he had to admit, the more he liked it.
"Thanks," he said and smiled at his twin as Bill held the mirror for him.
It was only a new hairstyle and yet he felt kind of new to go with the new feelings that were slowly taking him over. David would probably have a cow and even more people would get him and Bill mixed up, but it was worth it. He'd probably get a dye job and slowly go back to his natural colour, but he wasn't sure about that yet.
"Are you going to go over and see him now?" Bill asked, putting the mirror back on the dressing table.
Tom nodded; that was his plan, at least he thought it was. He was still a little confused about everything and nervous as hell. Bill leaned forward and hugged him.
"I'm sorry," Bill said quietly, "I never meant for this to happen, but it's worth it, I promise."
Tom hugged back; he didn't blame Bill. No one had foreseen how one twin's encounter could affect the other.
"Nothing to be sorry for," he said, and he meant it. "Did you ever think it might have been me all these years making you think you liked girls too?"
From the look on Bill's face when Tom pulled back, that idea had not crossed his twin's mind. They were so close, so completely in tune; they had just never realised quite how close.
"Good luck," was all Bill chose to say. "If all else fails, kiss him; it's what I did."
====
Tom had been rehearsing what to say all the way over to Gustav's place, but when the door opened and Gustav was right there, all words deserted him.
"Tom?" Gustav said, sounding surprised. "What had you done with your hair?"
He suddenly felt as if he was under a microscope and ran his fingers through is hair nervously.
"Looks good," Gustav said and smiled, "come on in."
Gustav was very good at ignoring people's nervous habits and Tom was very glad as he stepped inside. His brain was, frankly, blank, which meant he was playing the edge of his shirt and probably looked about thirteen.
"Want a beer?" Gustav asked and moved past him to lead him into the kitchen.
"Yeah, sure, thanks."
At least it gave him a few seconds respite, but he was still no closer to what he wanted to say when Gustav handed him a bottle.
"What's up?" Gustav asked, clearly aware that there was something on his mind.
"Um," was about all Tom could come up with to start, "it's ... y'know ... L.A. and stuff ..."
They had talked about the move to L.A. a lot over the past few months. The break-in had been the last straw and the whole band agreed it was for the best.
"Are you having second thoughts?" Gustav asked, looking concerned.
Tom really had no words. When it came to talking about unimportant things he could rattle on for hours; sometimes he was worse than Bill, but not when it came to personal things. He was actually kind of shy and this was important. Taking a deep breath, he took Bill's advice and just acted for a change.
His lips connected with Gustav's in a very ungraceful way and he drew back almost immediately, but the stunned look on Gustav's face let him know his message had been received. For a little while neither of them moved. Tom's rather panicked breathing was the only sound in the room.
"What the hell?" Gustav finally asked.
"What do you think?" Tom really didn't think he needed to explain himself.
"But you like girls," Gustav pointed out as if it was written in stone, "you..."
"Did," Tom interrupted before his friend could go on, "I did like girls."
He was abjectly terrified that Gustav was just going to throw him out or hit him or something. There was no rationale behind this mate stuff; he didn't understand it, but Bill and Georg's consummation of their bond had changed everything for him.
"Things like that don't just change," Gustav countered.
"They do when you're not human," Tom blurted out.
Gustav did not move, did not say anything; the drummer just stood there.
"What?" was the quiet question that came eventually.
Tom closed his eyes and tried to sort out his racing thoughts.
"Not human," he said, fearing what he would see when he looked back at Gustav. "Bill and I, we're not like you, we never have been. We're vampires."
It probably should have surprised him more when Gustav just accepted that and seemed to believe him.
"You knew," he said as he thought about it.
"I knew you weren't normal," Gustav replied immediately, "but I didn't know how. It never really mattered."
What that secret said about Gustav's character was huge. People didn't usually react to different quite so well.
"What happened between Georg and Bill?"
It was the kind of intelligent question that Tom knew he should have expected from his friend.
"Bill has always had a thing for Georg," he began to explain.
"I know," Gustav admitted.
Tom chalked another point up to the drummer.
"What we didn't realise is that Georg had a thing for Bill as well," he just continued to explain.
From the look on Gustav's face he hadn't know that bit either.
"Dana is a vampire as well and we were happy for them," Tom decided Gustav needed the whole story, "but something went wrong. She tried to form a bond with Georg, so that she could eventually share her immortality with him. It didn't work because of the connection between Bill and Georg, in fact it had the opposite effect of pushing them apart. Bill had to explain to Georg and they decided to go for it. Georg is going to come stay with us for a while once we're settled in in L.A."
He felt as if his soul was on display as Gustav just watched him and digested that information.
"And something about their bond has affected you," Gustav eventually said.
It wasn't a question, but Tom nodded anyway.
"I'm honestly beginning to think that Bill might have only ever liked girls because of what I was up to," he shared his reasoning, "and now that he's gone one step further than me everything has flipped on its head."
He had no other way to explain it. No one really understood the connection he had with Bill, not even his mother and she was nearly a hundred years old. Even a call to their grandparents, the real ones, not the ones who were actually family friends, had provided no ideas. Twins were rarer in vampire circles than they were in human ones.
"That doesn't explain why you've come to me."
Gustav's next point brought him back from his musings.
"I can't explain that either," he admitted with complete honesty, since he had less of an idea about that than the rest, "but it happens to be real. I think," he added, "because we don't have a lot of time, because we're going away, everything might had sped up. You're one of my three best friends, I used to love you like a brother, but that's kind of changed."
"I'd hope so," was the rather dry reply, "I'm pretty sure you and Bill aren't that close."
If Gustav was making jokes, Tom was pretty sure it couldn't be all bad.
"But why me?" Gustav asked, growing serious again.
"I've got a list if you want to hear it," he replied, since that was one thing he had thought about.
A small nod, as if Gustav didn't quite believe him, was his only response to that.
"Okay," he said, taking a swig of his beer and organising the thoughts in his head: "you're intelligent and dependable; your glasses as so incredibly sexy; you don't take shit from anyone; you have muscles that go on forever; you're incredibly strong and god your stamina; you ..."
"Okay," Gustav held up his hand and of all things, he seemed to be blushing.
Tom hadn't meant to embarrass his friend and they stared awkwardly at each other for a little while. Without his conscious consent his free hand moved back to his hair.
"You know, if you keep doing that you'll ruin the style Bill did for you."
It seemed Gustav no longer wanted to talk about himself.
"How did you know Bill did it?" Tom asked, trying to go with the flow.
That managed to raise a smile out of the drummer at least.
"Tom, you've had two hair styles since I've known you; both required very little input from you. Of course Bill did it."
The logic was irrefutable, so Tom just gave a little shrug.
"You like it though?" he couldn't help himself, he had to ask.
For a few seconds Gustav appeared very unsure, but then he nodded. "Yes, I like it."
More uncomfortable silence descended, but Tom began to hope he wasn't chasing dreams that would be broken. Gustav hadn't bodily removed him from the house yet after all.
"You changed it for me?" was the next question.
Tom nodded. "I want to prove that I mean it."
They had been friends for half their lives and yet this was so new it was as if they barely understood each other. Gustav had made it clear on several occasions that he didn't care about people's sexual orientations; it was each to their own, but Tom had only ever seen Gustav pursue girls.
"I've never ... with a guy."
It seemed his observations had been correct.
"Me either," he replied; "never wanted to until now."
"Oh, I've wanted to," was the surprising comment that came back, "but with you and Bill in the equation is didn't seem worth the risk."
"Me and Bill?" Things were definitely looking up.
"I like androgynous boys," Gustav admitted, seemingly willing to bare all now; "and you do that as well as Bill sometimes."
Suddenly his desire to drop some of the macho stuff was beginning to make sense. Vampire instincts were funny things, but they were usually right. Tom was never going to be Bill, but the little tweaks he felt like making appeared to have a reason.
"What do you want?"
It was a plain and simple question, but it had so many answers.
"I want to bite you," Tom started with the first thing that jumped into his head, "I want to kiss you; I want you to fuck me until I can't sit down; I want to ..."
He was cut off by lips on his own and Gustav might have been shorter than him, but that didn't stop who was in control. His back connected with the kitchen counter and Gustav's fingers were in his hair and he just let it all happen. He kissed back, but it was Gustav's tongue that plundered his mouth and Gustav's hands that touched him. In a way it was alien, the opposite to how he had always had these encounters before, but he was revelling in it.
"I think," Gustav said breathlessly when they finally broke apart, "that we already have the friendship part down; we should try the fucking part and make sure we both enjoy it."
That sounded like an incredibly sensible plan and Tom couldn't say yes fast enough. They shed clothes as they headed for the bedroom, never stopping touching all the way and there was more kissing and groping and then Tom found himself on his knees. He had never, ever sucked cock before, but he wanted to like his life depended on it. Just the way Gustav's fingers laced through and pulled his hair as he did his best to give the best blow job in the universe made him glad he had decided on the change. He loved it, even when Gustav forcefully pulled him off and pushed him onto the bed.
Part of him trembled at the idea of being fucked; he knew enough to know that it would probably hurt a little the first time, but part of him was also trembling with delight. The idea of being laid bare, opened and speared filled him with such need that he wanted it right then. He had prepared, just in case; he was clean, but that didn't mean he was ready.
The fact that Gustav had condoms and lube, said a lot about how prepared their drummer was for every eventuality, but Tom soon found out Gustav knew what he was doing as well. Gustav's strong, calloused fingers pushed into him with ease. All he had to do was lay back and surrender as Gustav prepared him with a skill that belied it being the first time. It was as Gustav found his prostate that a little light went on inside his head and he realised Gustav had probably done this to himself. That thought alone almost had him coming on the spot.
When Gustav finally pushed into him, that strong body looming above him, it was wonderful and it was not so wonderful all at the same time. It hurt, more than a little, and they had several false starts, but eventually his body got with the program and then it mostly just blew his mind.
Tom had honestly never had a sexual experience like it. He wanted it so damn much and who he was with mattered so completely that he had no control at all. When he came he was pretty sure he screamed Gustav's name and his orgasm seemed to go on forever. He felt Gustav come, shuddering against him after a couple more thrusts, but that was about as much sense as the world made for a while. At some point Gustav pulled out and lay down next to him and he finally came back to himself to find that he was curled over his lover's side and onto the wide, muscled chest.
As soon as he opened his eyes he knew that his vampire sense were fully online and he breathed in the scent of sex and Gustav all at once. His fangs were down and he knew what he wanted, but he wasn't sure Gustav would. He ran his hand slowly up Gustav's chest and finally lifted himself up so that he was looking into his lover's face.
"Well I enjoyed that," he said, not trying to hide the reality of what he was.
Then he waited and allowed Gustav to just look at him.
"So did I," Gustav replied eventually and reached up to touch his face.
Gustav appeared fascinated.
"Are you stronger than me?" Gustav asked in a quiet, contemplative tone.
"Yes," Tom replied; he was not about to lie, "but I like playing human for you."
He had enjoyed being dominated. It seemed to be part of who he was now and he liked that.
"Of course, we can switch sometimes if you want," he added with a smile, deliberately showing off his fangs.
That earned him a smile back.
"What happens when you bite me?"
Tom definitely took notice of the 'when' not an 'if'.
"Pleasure," he replied, "nothing else if you don't want it yet."
He wanted to bite and to form the bond, but he was well aware Gustav might not. The idea of Gustav growing old and dying flashed in his mind and he closed his eyes, trying to banish it. It was so wrong.
"Tom," Gustav's worried tone brought him back and a gentle touch made him open his eyes, "what's wrong."
It made him feel so vulnerable, but he couldn't lie. "I've been having nightmares. I keep seeing you and you ..." He didn't want to voice it. "You die without letting me stop it."
"Does this bond make me immortal?" Gustav asked in such a gentle tone that Tom felt as if he must be being a real idiot.
He shook his head.
"No, but it sets a point that I can take you back to when you're ready," he explained. "It would make it real."
For a while Gustav didn't say anything, ever the man of thought and few words.
"You're beautiful," was what the drummer decided to say in the end, "and I think I love this new you even more than I did the old one."
Tom thought his heart might beat out of his chest; Gustav loved him.
"Bite me," Gustav told him sincerely, "make me yours."
Gustav's blood was sweet and fine and like sunshine on a summer's day. It filled Tom with warmth and such a feeling of wholeness that it was the most natural thing in the world to reach out with his power and wind his essence with his lover's. Nothing had ever felt so easy or so right and he finally understood why Bill had been looking so blissfully happy over the last few days. This was how it was supposed to be.
The End