(no subject)
Day One: Ten things you want to say to ten different people right now.
Day Two: Nine things about yourself.
Day Three: Eight ways to win your heart
Day Four: Seven things that cross your mind a lot.
Day Five: Six things you wish you'd never done.
This is an interesting one. As I said yesterday, I don't necessarily let the past rule my life. Obviously, things I've done have helped to shape who I am today, and major changes would have major ripples. So, I'll look at this as changes in a scenario where they do not fundamentally change the essence of "Berek".
1.Part 1- Beg off from hanging out with my Dad on Dec. 4, 2007. For all I know, he would have died in the car right next to me, or at the mall, or not. All that matters is that I blew him off when he wanted to spend time with me, and the next day I found him in his bed.
2. Part 2 - I wish I hadn't touched him. My brother and I came to the house to check on him because a friend/co-worker was worried. We both had a feeling, and when we saw the front door open, I think we both knew. But we went in, called out to him, walked to the bedroom and found him. We tried calling to him again, and then I walked up, and tried to shake him, and then I touched his face. He was cold. I will never forget this, and I really, really want to. To the point where I had actually repressed the memory of touching his cheek until my brother mentioned it, and it all hit me again.
3.Part 3 - (sensing a theme?) Gone ahead with the wedding. I'm not saying we shouldn't have gotten married. I'm saying we should have postponed. I know some people wouldn't have understood, and the money would have been a problem, but we should have waited. 3 months was not enough time, and think that it was one of the things that weighed down our marriage.
4. Allowed my brother to move in/moved into the house. This was a mistake on so many levels, not the least of which being that we compromised our privacy, to say nothing of the stress of being stuck between my brother and my fiance/wife.
5. Leaving Boston. I left all of my friends to return to the house I grew up in, and spent the last 12 years trying not to be a shut-in. I've never had as many friends here as I did when I lived back east, and I've stayed in touch with my friends from the area better than any previous group of friends in y life.
6. Most people can guess the last one. I wish I hadn't self-destructed in school. I blew it at Brandeis. I had an amazing opportunity, and I wasted it. I wasn't mature enough to be responsible for myself, and rather than face that and try to learn, I indulged myself. I half-assed my work, blew off classes, and generally behaved like a dumbass. Just about the only good thing I actually took away from Brandeis was the incredible group of friends that I made, for which I will always be grateful. But I never got back into school in a serious way, and I constantly wish I had my degree. Maybe I'd be teaching, maybe I'd still be producing video games. Who the hell knows? I wish I did.
Day Six: Five people who mean a lot (in no order whatsoever)
Day Seven: Four turn-offs.
Day Eight: Three turn-ons.
Day Nine: Two images that describe your life right now, and why.
Day Ten: One confession.
Day Two: Nine things about yourself.
Day Three: Eight ways to win your heart
Day Four: Seven things that cross your mind a lot.
Day Five: Six things you wish you'd never done.
This is an interesting one. As I said yesterday, I don't necessarily let the past rule my life. Obviously, things I've done have helped to shape who I am today, and major changes would have major ripples. So, I'll look at this as changes in a scenario where they do not fundamentally change the essence of "Berek".
1.Part 1- Beg off from hanging out with my Dad on Dec. 4, 2007. For all I know, he would have died in the car right next to me, or at the mall, or not. All that matters is that I blew him off when he wanted to spend time with me, and the next day I found him in his bed.
2. Part 2 - I wish I hadn't touched him. My brother and I came to the house to check on him because a friend/co-worker was worried. We both had a feeling, and when we saw the front door open, I think we both knew. But we went in, called out to him, walked to the bedroom and found him. We tried calling to him again, and then I walked up, and tried to shake him, and then I touched his face. He was cold. I will never forget this, and I really, really want to. To the point where I had actually repressed the memory of touching his cheek until my brother mentioned it, and it all hit me again.
3.Part 3 - (sensing a theme?) Gone ahead with the wedding. I'm not saying we shouldn't have gotten married. I'm saying we should have postponed. I know some people wouldn't have understood, and the money would have been a problem, but we should have waited. 3 months was not enough time, and think that it was one of the things that weighed down our marriage.
4. Allowed my brother to move in/moved into the house. This was a mistake on so many levels, not the least of which being that we compromised our privacy, to say nothing of the stress of being stuck between my brother and my fiance/wife.
5. Leaving Boston. I left all of my friends to return to the house I grew up in, and spent the last 12 years trying not to be a shut-in. I've never had as many friends here as I did when I lived back east, and I've stayed in touch with my friends from the area better than any previous group of friends in y life.
6. Most people can guess the last one. I wish I hadn't self-destructed in school. I blew it at Brandeis. I had an amazing opportunity, and I wasted it. I wasn't mature enough to be responsible for myself, and rather than face that and try to learn, I indulged myself. I half-assed my work, blew off classes, and generally behaved like a dumbass. Just about the only good thing I actually took away from Brandeis was the incredible group of friends that I made, for which I will always be grateful. But I never got back into school in a serious way, and I constantly wish I had my degree. Maybe I'd be teaching, maybe I'd still be producing video games. Who the hell knows? I wish I did.
Day Six: Five people who mean a lot (in no order whatsoever)
Day Seven: Four turn-offs.
Day Eight: Three turn-ons.
Day Nine: Two images that describe your life right now, and why.
Day Ten: One confession.