(no subject)
DEFEATED.
i believe that is the only word that can describe me currently. (adj.) beaten or overcome; disappointingly unsuccessful. The beaten or overcome part of that definition suits me startlingly well. I have never been so physically, emotionally and mentally exhausted in my life. I have worked the past eleven days without one off. I dont know when I will see my next day off, which will be my twelfth day off all summer. I dont know if it is the hours i am putting in at work, the sleep deprivation, the malnourishment, the lack of success finding a car, my inability to treat myself, the gasleak present in the 130+ degree kitchen in which i spend a minimum of a third of my days, the overall lack of intelligence with the people that surround me at my job, or some other unsuspected factor, but i am currently smelling the defeat. That defeat smells like a combination of fryer grease, sausage and mayonnaise.
PS. I wanted to go see Hootie and the Blowfish, but i have to work for fifteen hours on saturday, so my best guess is that is a no-go, and that, more than anything in the world makes me want to cry.
i believe that is the only word that can describe me currently. (adj.) beaten or overcome; disappointingly unsuccessful. The beaten or overcome part of that definition suits me startlingly well. I have never been so physically, emotionally and mentally exhausted in my life. I have worked the past eleven days without one off. I dont know when I will see my next day off, which will be my twelfth day off all summer. I dont know if it is the hours i am putting in at work, the sleep deprivation, the malnourishment, the lack of success finding a car, my inability to treat myself, the gasleak present in the 130+ degree kitchen in which i spend a minimum of a third of my days, the overall lack of intelligence with the people that surround me at my job, or some other unsuspected factor, but i am currently smelling the defeat. That defeat smells like a combination of fryer grease, sausage and mayonnaise.
PS. I wanted to go see Hootie and the Blowfish, but i have to work for fifteen hours on saturday, so my best guess is that is a no-go, and that, more than anything in the world makes me want to cry.