Thorn

[benson_san]

It's a thorn in my side.
How nothing ever goes as planned.
The way that I am.
The way that I have to be.
They are not the same.
I want to die.
I want to live.
I don't know what I want.

It's a thorn in my side.
How nothing I do will ever be good enough.
For me.
For my friends.
For my parents.
I always fall one step short.
I want to fail.
I want to succeed.
I am lost.

It's a thorn in my side.
How the pain never fades.
It's still there.
It's faint.
It's sharp.
I want it to end.
I want it to continue.
I can't stop it.

It's a thorn in my side.
The way I'm supposed to be.
The way I am.
The level I have to reach.
The level I am at.
The pain that never fades.
The pain that does.

The thorn in my side is still there.
I can't see it.

But I know it's there.